[handset | video] one love, one life (backdated to 3/5 or so)

[edgeoftheknife]

[The video flips on to show Erskine, gorgeous as always, and actually not looking dog-tired for once! In fact, he's smiling. This is possibly the happiest Erskine has looked on the network while sober.

...which probably has to do with the attractive redhead hovering in the background. Those who've seen Erskine's echo stone will recognize Hopeless. Those who haven't might recognize the man Erskine's been attached at the hip to for the last couple of weeks.]

Right, hello everyone. So, Hopeless had a question--

[The redhead in the background scoffs gently.]

Alright, we had a question. How old are all you Foreigners out there? We're interested in age demographics. You can be vague if you like, and you don't have to answer of course.

And in the spirit of sharing, I... missed my last birthday. It was in February. Which I suppose makes me 409 now.

Comments

[scryinghope]

[That's a long time to have been here.]

Have you gone home at all in that time? That is -- did you return to being eleven, and come back as an eleven-year-old, or return with the age you were when you left here?

[unetrustworthy]

[Very. She was, by most accounts, one of the longest residing Foreigners in the city. Only a handful of others, at most, could claim tenure over her.]

I know what you mean, and...no, I've never been back home once in all that time.

Though it's probably just as well. I'm...not entirely sure I would still be alive if I had.

[scryinghope]

I see.

[His smile turns gently sympathetic.]

Neither will I. Would you like to talk about it?

[unetrustworthy]

[She seemed unsurprised by the mutual reveal. How many others over the years had she encountered whose last chance at life was being in Keelai? Not for the first time, she thought of Eponine. The young woman Midii had very nearly come to love as an older sister figure. Knowing that when she was gone, she'd be gone.]

There isn't much to talk about.

In my world, there was a War. Worse than anything I've seen here...and that includes the battle with Malicant. Just before I'd been taken and brought here, I was left on my own in the middle of a battlefield. There were dead soldiers all around me. They'd been ambushed, and it was my fault.

[...okay, so maybe there was more of a story than she let on.]

[scryinghope]

[It always seems to come down to war. Hopeless remains intently listening, his expression still showing that gentle sympathy. But that makes him frown, ever so slightly.]

How was it your fault?

[unetrustworthy]

Because I was the one who told their attackers where they were.

[scryinghope]

[Gently:]

And you don't think their attackers would appreciate your help enough to let you live?

[unetrustworthy]

[Sometimes, it was still....almost strange to her when people reacted so calmly to one of her darkest secrets. But then, she realized that none of this was personal for them. They never had the whole story, nor a reason to choose anyone's side but hers.]

They did. They tried to.

When I was sent out, they gave me a little golden cross. It was supposed to be a transmitter, so they would be able to find me. But...I gave it to someone else. So he would be safe.

[scryinghope]

He must be special to you. You don't think you might be special enough to him, for him to send them to find you?

[unetrustworthy]

[And here is where things got complicated.]

He was my first love.

He was...also one of the soldiers in the troupe that was killed. They were like his family. He was the only survivor.

[scryinghope]

I'm sorry.

[This is less an apology for asking and more of that sympathy. He notes, also, that she didn't actually answer the question; which is, in its own way, an answer.]

Would you prefer it, if you went back and didn't have a future?

[unetrustworthy]

[Nanashii had always been pretty hard to read. Only because she'd spent so much of their time spent together watching him...noting the tiniest changes in his facial features, the tensing and relaxing of his shoulders in reaction to the events around him...was she ever able to get much out of him at all.]

[But even she had to admit a gun to the face, even if he didn't fire in the end, was a pretty big tell that her feelings weren't reciprocated. Not then.]

I used to think so.

But now...I'm thankful to be here. Keelai gave me a second chance at life, and a chance to do some good for once.

[scryinghope]

[He smiles a little, a small one no less genuine for it.]

That's great to hear. If you get sent back, I hope you get the opportunity to find one in your original world as well.

[unetrustworthy]

[You, Hopeless, were not living up to your name. And also far more optimistic than Midii.]

I doubt it.

But...it would be nice if that did happen. Even if my eleven-year-old self might not agree right away.

[scryinghope]

[It's become something of an ironically chosen name. Which is why he rather belatedly chose 'Descry' to come before it.]

You might be surprised. Some people are capable of being enormously forgiving. What makes you think your young man isn't one of them?

[unetrustworthy]

[Her honest, unfiltered opinion?]

I don't.

He could have shot me dead that day, but he didn't. Instead, he just...left.

[It was as ambiguous a reaction as she should have expected from the boy. He spared her life, but also rejected her in a different way.]

[scryinghope]

People often need some time to process things which happen. If he couldn't kill you in the moment, it says something about his potential choices in the future.

[A bit of a head-tip.]

So why do you doubt you'll get your second chance in that world?

[unetrustworthy]

Because there's a strong chance I would be dead by now.

[Left alone in the middle of nowhere, with Death all around her. It wasn't a completely unreasonable assumption to make.]

[scryinghope]

[Not completely unreasonable. But in Hopeless's experience, those who resign themselves tend to be the first to fall. And it does sound like Midii has resigned; but only back there, where Hopeless can't help, because by the time she goes back -- she won't remember. And yet.

[He hums a little.]

Second chances aren't often received by those who expect them. So I'm going to continue hoping you do get yours.

[unetrustworthy]

[You do you, Mr. hopeful Hopeless.]

If you insist.

[scryinghope]

[He manages it, most days.]

I do.

[He smiles brilliantly.]

But while you're here -- keep doing what you're doing, okay? I might not be here for long, but if you need to bend someone's ear, please feel free to let me know.

[unetrustworthy]

...why do you think you won't be here long?

[And then, just as a guess, knowing what she knew about the last time a large group of Foreigners showed up for a limited time. Some of whom returned later, but with a certain item:]

Do you...not have a soul gem?