Joint Post: The House of El Presents the Justice Tribbles

[lookedtothestars]

[OOC: For the purpose of clarity, Jor-El’s speech and his actions are in red, and Kal-El and his actions are in blue. Additionally, all of the Kryptonians are currently being especially affected by the increasingly prolific tribbles and the effects they usually have on the nervous system. ]

[Standing in front of the camera, side by side, are two Kryptonians. They’re surrounded by tribbles in an Earth Sector suite. Those who know Kal-El know he always tries to have a smile on his face, but there's obviously something different about it now.

Maybe it's the way he can't help the little chuckles, as if he was doing something terribly amusing.]

Alright so, my father here- [A chuckle because guys he has a father] Asked me about my job, about what I do. And I thought it was a good idea to explain it to y'all, to explain what the Justice League does.

So let's start!

[Jor-El, in comparison to Kal-El, seems to be normal. Visibly smiling, and paying attention to his son. No chuckling going on here. Of course, it’s not normal at all if you compare his appearance here to the responses he was giving after his initial request on the network.

Something’s going on here.]

Yes, let’s.

The justice league is what we called our society, a group of heroes that got together to protect Earth from things we cannot fight on our own. We're like super friends! And there's a lot of us.

Alright so first, there is me. [Cue a tribble wearing a cape.] I'm Superman, or Kal-El. I am strong, fast-

-Wait. [Jor-El is looking at the tribble, and then Kal-El.] It cannot represent you.

Why not? It has a cape!

You’re not a tribble. You are also right here. There’s no need for one to represent you. [He sounds completely serious.]

Well... okay. [And off goes the tribble through the window.] I am Kal-El. I save people, and I like to fly. Next is Batman! [This tribble has a mask attached at random, they couldn't find the eyes.] He is also not a tribble.

What’s a bat? [This is a perfectly reasonable question.]

It's a terran mammal! And they fly. But Batman doesn't fly, he just punches bad guys.

Do bats attack people? [Why would people keep around an animal like that.]

No. Not... Usually? Dunno, he's a weird guy. Let's move on... to Aquaman! [This tribble is inside some kind of fish tank, oh dear.] He is a king. He controls seas and oceans. And he talks to fish!

[Going from the lack of surprise, Jor-El was probably complicit in the acquisition of the aquarium. He seems to be reconsidering it, however.] Kal-El, don’t these need to breathe?

Arthur doesn't need to breathe underwater, don't be silly, Father. Next is Green Lantern! [In case you didn't guess, there’s a group of four tribbles painted green.] There are a lot of them and they fly in SPACE. [Pshooow tribble out the window again, Kal-El ignores it.] They are like the space cops.

Are they also based on Earth?

They are based on the rainbow, they have all the colors. But I like the green ones the most. [Apparently he shows his love by throwing another 'green' tribble out.

This non-answer gets a nod from Jor-El.]

Next...oooh Wooonder Woman! She is also very strong and...

[As Kal keeps on talking, a tribble falls in front of the screen. And then another, and another- and you know how it goes. When the feed ends, Kal didn't seem to have noticed or care and kept on talking.]

Comments

video;

[shorttempered]

[Have a confused, slightly confused superhero staring at you.]

...Superman? ...Uh, Superman's... dad? Are you okay?

Re: video;

[andaway]

[Kal is still chuckling when he replies.]

We're fine. Wondeful. Never been better. Why do you ask invincible?

video;

[shorttempered]

...Because you're totally acting like you're on drugs.

In fact, I think kedan children can use that video as "don't do drugs" after school special video.

STRAIGHT TO ACTION?

[relentlesstide]

[An hour later after this post goes up, Arthur shows up at the door, looking pissed off and holding his trident. He's dripping wet and holding a bag of sodden Justice Tribbles, which, from the look on his face, he plans to beat Kal to death with.]

If I find another one of these in my canals, I will make you eat it.

actionnn

[andaway]

You found the tribbles!

[Were you expecting Kal to be scared? Because he's only going to hug the hell out of you Arthur he's gonna do it.] Thank you Arthur I knew you'd love tribbles too.

[relentlesstide]

[Arthur manages to look only a little disgruntled as Kal hugs him tight and he starts squirming away, thankful he's a goddamn Atlantean and used to a lot of crushing pressure.] Let go, I don't love these things. They're invasive and they scare the fish. [Also the wet tribbles in the bag are probably dead. They're not making that godawful noise, anyway.]

video;

[urbanmagic]

Superman? [She really wants to ask about the whole dad thing because what. But that can wait. Man, and she thought Kon was high. Though Justice League tribbles do sound kind of cut--- Traci. Focus.]

I'm pretty sure tossing them out like that is either animal abuse or breaking a special kind of littering law. Please stop that. [She doesn't want more of those things spreading to who knows where.]

Re: video;

[andaway]

I'm not tossing them out! I'm making them fly. Like me.

I can fly, you know?

video;

[urbanmagic]

[This was not how she wanted to see her childhood idol again. Kal, stop.]

You are so out of it. I don't think they think they're flying. Where did you even get these?

[notdreaming]

Kal, Kaaal, my tribbles want to meet your tribbles!

[ Kara holds three tribbles in her arms, though more are behind her. She's only half in view of the camera, giggling madly as she tries to keep them under control. ]

[andaway]

[Have Kal's best :0 face] Are they lonely? Maybe that's why they breed so much! Come here Kara we will make them a party.

->>action;

[notdreaming]

Of course they're lonely, they've only got each other to play with! I named them after all of my friends and mom and dad and you have to meet them. Let me grab a cape and I'll be right over there like right now.

[ And so it is. She flies over with a pile of tribbles held in a white cape she picked out just for this purpose. ]

Video;

[backinakidflash]

[He shouldn't be doing this. He knows that he shouldn't be doing this. They don't need any encouragement, but he also knows that he may never get another chance at this and so cannot help it, and Bart is trying so very hard to keep a straight face that he is vibrating with the effort.]

You forgot the Flash. Unforgiveable.

Video;

[lookedtothestars]

[Jor-El is presenting a tribble to the screen. It's painted red. There's even an unpainted little bit of blond fur to make the lightning bolt, too.]

He had not.

[The worst part about this is that he's saying this completely seriously.]

Video;

[backinakidflash]

[Bart has to duck offscreen to hide a break in composure. When he sits back up, he gives Jor-El a serious nod.]

I expect him to use baby Tribbles for another demonstration later.

video;

[everylittlegirl]

[Hayley's just going to.. stare. She drops her chin onto her good hand, her 'bad' arm down by her side now as it's mostly better.]

Aren't you-..

[...]

You're a..

[...]

Shouldn't you be saving someone.. or.. something?

[She's mostly just confused to see a superhero playing with tribbles. And that his dad is helping out is just that much worse.]

video;

[notdreaming]

[ Kara can't resist poking her head in whenever the mood strikes her with permission of the original posters, even as she pets a tribble that purrs loudly in her arms. ]

Why, is somebody in trouble?

video;

[everylittlegirl]

Is there ever someone not in trouble here?

video

[justlittle]

[The single tribble Bean had found is now three, but even he is confounded by the sight before him.]

I do not think they make for good reenactments.

video

[andaway]

Well, I admit bat-tribble was a challenge. It's hard to be Batman when you don't have eyes, you know?

but I think they came out pretty nice. Do you want one?

video

[escarabajo]

[The Kryptonians have all gone loopy. And didn't Superman's planet get blown up, or something? Why is his father here? Why is this happening.]

We're screwed.

video

[andaway]

No, we're not! Weren't you listening? The Justice League is here to save us!

Video;

[raptorcanaria]

[Leaving out that they didn't mention her...]

And I say to you what I said elsewhere.

What.

Video;

[lookedtothestars]

[Kal-El is visible in the background, squishing what can only be a Black Canary tribble and a Green Arrow tribble together while making kissy faces.]

Yes?

[Sorry, you're going to have to be clearer.]

there and gone actionspam

[cowled]

[SCREECH HIS LIFE IS AWFUL BRUCE HATES EVERYTHING EVER CLARK WHY.

This is the story of how, an appropriate amount of time after Dinah's visit, Bruce drops by to give Lois half a dozen small, noise-cancelling devices rather like Dinah's Canary Cry bombs that can keep a sphere of influence of up to twenty metres.

Because bloody Kryptonians. He isn't even going to try to talk to Clark when he's like this, honestly.]