Video;
[ The video begins with a dark-haired man centered in the middle of the frame. He’s got dark eyes, a precisely cut goatee, and hair that’s a little too styled to be naturally that neat. There isn’t a lot to see beyond his chin, he’s sitting too close to the camera, but what can be seen looks vaguely like a shirt of shiny red metal.
His brow knits almost immediately after the feed starts recording, his expression edging toward disbelief as his lips twist into a mild frown. ]
Look. I get it. In a time of crisis, rationing’s necessary to keep resources moving in the right direction. Perfectly understandable. You guys needed to save your turtle. What responsible citizen wouldn’t do their part for that noble cause?
[ There’s a slight hint f sarcasm creeping into his voice, as though he’s heard the whole turtle spiel already and not only hasn’t been impressed, but also doesn’t really buy it either. Not even after having spent half a day scouring the network for information about what’s really going on here before making this video. ]
But really? Twenty bucks?
[ The low, indistinct murmur of another voice can be heard, though what it’s saying and who it belongs to is anyone’s guess. Whatever it says, it’s enough to make the man roll his eyes. ]
Juulan. Whatever. Doesn’t matter. The point — [ Whether he’s talking to the camera or the unidentified voice is unclear. ] — is that it isn’t enough for a day, let alone the entire bogus adventure.
[ It isn’t so much the way he looks at the camera – his eyes have never left it – but the change of his tone, less querulous and more curious, that indicates that he’s talking to whoever’s on the other end of the console. ]
So really. Turtle propaganda aside. What’s a guy gotta do to get some decent money around here? Sell his organs? Hit the street corners? Scrub barnacles off the bottom of the turtle? What?
His brow knits almost immediately after the feed starts recording, his expression edging toward disbelief as his lips twist into a mild frown. ]
Look. I get it. In a time of crisis, rationing’s necessary to keep resources moving in the right direction. Perfectly understandable. You guys needed to save your turtle. What responsible citizen wouldn’t do their part for that noble cause?
[ There’s a slight hint f sarcasm creeping into his voice, as though he’s heard the whole turtle spiel already and not only hasn’t been impressed, but also doesn’t really buy it either. Not even after having spent half a day scouring the network for information about what’s really going on here before making this video. ]
But really? Twenty bucks?
[ The low, indistinct murmur of another voice can be heard, though what it’s saying and who it belongs to is anyone’s guess. Whatever it says, it’s enough to make the man roll his eyes. ]
Juulan. Whatever. Doesn’t matter. The point — [ Whether he’s talking to the camera or the unidentified voice is unclear. ] — is that it isn’t enough for a day, let alone the entire bogus adventure.
[ It isn’t so much the way he looks at the camera – his eyes have never left it – but the change of his tone, less querulous and more curious, that indicates that he’s talking to whoever’s on the other end of the console. ]
So really. Turtle propaganda aside. What’s a guy gotta do to get some decent money around here? Sell his organs? Hit the street corners? Scrub barnacles off the bottom of the turtle? What?
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[ Some people have shame. Tony doesn't. He's never been particularly adept at playing coy and he isn't about to start now. ]
Nothing in life worth anything's easy. Effort just makes the reward that much better. Don't worry.
[ He winks. ]
I'll figure it out.
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If you like mystery so much, would you prefer I don't introduce myself then, or explain how I know a version of you?
[Because hey, if he wants to really work for it then who is she to stop him?]
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[ He does want to know her name. In fact, he wants to know everything she'll tell him. He has a feeling he'll be working hard for everything else in this place, a few easy answers won't make him too complacent. ]
Tell me? You know who I am. It's only fair I know too. Especially since I just volunteered to wash your swizard.
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[She can't help but smirk a bit, as it's tempting to continue to withhold the information, but she knows a man of his technical skills could probably dredge it up from the network in short time.]
My name is Wanda, also known as the Scarlet Witch. In my world, we're teammates on a team called the Ultimates. In another world there's a similar team that goes by the name Avengers, if any of these names ring a bell.
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Uh, Avengers, yes. But only barely. It's a SHIELD initiative. They brought some of us together, we fought the Chitauri, then we broke up the band.
[ Is that good enough? He really doesn't want to talk about New York. He doesn't want to think about New York. ]
So but you're a—You do the superhero gig?
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There's no reason to dredge it all back up, blow for blow.]
I do, have been for a couple years now or so, along with my brother.
[Though they weren't always part of the Ultimates. They hadn't been recruited so much as fallen on the mercy of SHIELD when their father had come after them. Discussing anything to do with the man or how they'd joined the team appealed to Wanda as much as talking about New York appealed to Tony.]
We've been through a great deal in a short period of time but we work well together. None of them are here now, unfortunately, unless you count alternate versions of course.
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[ He's just guessing there, his experience with family so minor that it might as well be non-existent. In theory, it sounds like it would be a benefit, working with someone one knows one can trust. In practice, family's usually a lot more fucked up than TV would have people believe. ]
The one I know, the Avengers, it's kind of a crap shoot. I mean, we did all right. Saved the day. But it's—It took a long time.
This whole alternate reality thing, does that happen a lot here? Is it always like, "hey guy I talked to yesterday who isn't really the guy I know?" Or do we eventually meet people from our world and our time?
no subject
She focuses on the rest of what he says instead.]
More or less, I'm afraid. There are some worlds more represented by those present than others, though with the shifts in timelines or points from which everyone is taken, it's more likely you'll find yourself from a unique time and place than the same as someone else.
[She pauses briefly.]
As a version of you has already been here before, I imagine that complicates matters even more for you.
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Everything's always complicated for me. I think it's my real middle name. The Edward's just a cover for Complicated.
[ But since she's addressed the elephant in the room... ]
I saw him. On the network. It's a little weird seeing someone who looks so much like me, but the possibilities are endless, right? All the other iterations of Tony Stark can't have tentacles and blue skin and antlers, can they?
[ Really, he hopes that none of them do. That would be disturbing. But the point, however exaggerated, stands. That other Tony Stark isn't him, and the sooner everyone accepts that, the easier it will be for all of them. ]
no subject
Well no, not blue skin or antlers...or tentacles. Not really, but...well. The Tony Stark of my world does have a vestigial tail.
[How she says that with an entirely straight face, she doesn't know. Further more she speaks slowly, quietly as if she is trying to break this news gently.]
It's actually prehensile so he's built it an armored covering for his suit so that he can make use of it when we are in battle.
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[ The look he gives her borders on disbelief and a kind of resigned disgust that says that try though he might, he really can't be that surprised. The stupid shit always happens to him.
Rolling his eyes, he shakes his head and sighs. It could be worse. It could totally be worse. He's just going to keep telling himself that. ]
Guess it could be worse. He could be a mandrill.
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But the mention of mandrills makes her choke on a laugh. She coughs to cover it.]
Yes, that would be rather unsettling, considering all things. If only for the contrast to how I'm used to seeing him, of course.
[Leaning back in her seat, she attempts a smile, one entirely free of mischief.]
I expect it's safe to say you have no such unexpected oddities?
no subject
[ If Tony had shame, he would be ashamed of himself right now. Luckily for him, he doesn't. ]
Sorry to say — [ For her sake if she's into tails, not for Tony's. ] — I'm tail free. You can check to make sure though, if you want.
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There is no tail showing or swizard washing between us, thank you.
[What has she gotten herself into?]
And I think for now I'll take your word for it you're tail free. After all, we've only just met.
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[ He shrugs easily, not perturbed. What happens between the man she knows and herself isn't really something he's all that interested in. ]
No offense. Just making conversation.
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[With a quirk of a smile still on her lips, she leans in again, resting a her chin on her hand, elbow on the console ledge itself.]
I don't mean to imply we can't get to know each other more, of course.
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[ And he doesn't just mean that in the sexual sense. ]
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[Because he's Tony Stark, and Wanda knows that there was another one here before. He's bound to be mobbed right now by people glad to see him, trying to figure out what he knows, if he knows them, and so forth.]
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[ He nods, flashing a smile. ]
It's a date. I'm going to hold you to it.
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By all means. Until then, Tony.
[She disconnects.]