[video]

[bacondivination]

[ Loki is leaning a bit too close to the terminal screen when he starts to record his little post. He seems a little too bright-eyed given the circumstances, and there’s an odd rapidity to his speech when he starts talking. ]

I have to admit, I am disappointed. [ He holds up a touchscreen phone so his audience can get a look at it. ] These Starkphones are simply not designed for the rigor of interdimensional travel, and the lack of service is a failure I cannot abide. How will I chronicle my doings without the aid of Instagram and Facebook? Nor can I go on to spread knowledge of this failing with a review!

At least the natives of this realm are accommodating, though I don’t think this makes for an adequate replacement of my phone.

[ He pauses only briefly before switching gears. ] Now, moving onto more important matters… I have a few questions about the quality of native cuisine and where the best breakfast can be found.

Comments

[crotcharrow]

[This isn't sitting well with him at all.]

Like we'd ever trust you enough to--I mean, you're Loki.

[A pause as he looks him up and down.] Since when were you like six?

[bacondivination]

I am not so young as that!

[ There's a faint, distinctly pubescent crack in his voice that is just outright awkward. He definitely hadn't meant for that to occur. ]

My brother allowed me to be reincarnated when I died. It came with side-effects, like not being the Loki you're familiar with.

[crotcharrow]

So what, just because you're a kid now, means we can trust you? I don't trust kids, they sell you out the moment they get offered candy.

[bacondivination]

Yes, well, that could make for a tempting bargain if you keep haranguing me.

[crotcharrow]

I bet you're small enough that I could kick you across the turtle shell.

[bacondivination]

Am not.

[ His eyes narrow. ]

You wouldn't dare try kicking me.

[crotcharrow]

Wanna bet I can't move faster than it takes you to say some magic words?

[bacondivination]

[ There's a moment where he scrunches his face up in distaste, but he doesn't offer any banter in turn. ]

You have made your point. You can cease threatening me now.

[crotcharrow]

Yeah, I guess it's not fun when you look like a kid because then I look like the asshole.

[bacondivination]

If it makes you feel better, you hardly need any help looking like an asshole.

[crotcharrow]

You're lucky I wear it good, kid.

[witchnotwarlock]

Not trusting him, Tommy, but we should get to know him, at least.

[bacondivination]

That would work! Even my own brother doesn't trust me entirely.

[ Or at all. Which is totally helping his case here.

But let's be real, it has never been the smart option. He knows this. ]

[witchnotwarlock]

Well, I mean, you are Loki. Even if you're younger, you're still the god of mischief, so there's that to remember!

[crotcharrow]

[He's making a pissy cat noise.]

I don't like this.

[witchnotwarlock]

[Billy shrugs and looks off to the side.] He's here. And he knows us. Do we have a choice?

[crotcharrow]

Uh, yeah? It's call ignore and hope it goes back to whatever hole it crawled out of. But you're not gonna let this go, are you?

[witchnotwarlock]

[Tommy. See that look on his face? The look of 'did you even need to ask that?'.]

No, I'm not.

[crotcharrow]

[He rolls his eyes rather dramatically.]

Fine. Just don't come crying to me when it blows up in your face.

[witchnotwarlock]

Don't worry, I won't come crying to you. I'll just drag you into it.

[crotcharrow]

Oy, I hate you.

[He's joking, of course.]

[witchnotwarlock]

[Time to grin cheekily.]

Yeah, I know. [He's fond of you, too.]

[crotcharrow]

[He sticks out his tongue because he's a mature adult.]