tushanshu | [video]

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[video]

[Brandon looks, for all intents and purposes, bored as hell.]

You know what this place really needs?

[Bit of a pause. Purely for dramatic effect, you understand. He is an actor.]

Twitter.

And if you have to ask me what that is, you're seriously dead to me. Like. Don't even try.

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Your pot can call my kettle black when you've written exposés on unethical and illegal experimentation, taken down major crime rings, and challenged a sitting president on possibly treasonous acts while in office.

And not until you've won a Pulitzer for them. Once you have, then we'll talk.

And you can talk after you've been brainwashed and tortured and experimented on like all my friends back home. I don't care about what you write. You don't get to sit there and spout self-righteous hyperbole at me until you've actually been in the goddamned trenches, lady!

Sorry to hear you get to live through hell too. I know what kind of scars it can leave on a kid.

I gotta ask, though: what part of your self-righteous anger at other people has anything to do with my professionalism?

I didn't say I lived through it.

You aren't being professional. You're bragging. There's a difference.

You call watching that happen to your friends not living through hell? Odd standards you have there.

If you hadn't questioned my professionalism, you wouldn't have gotten my CV.

I didn't watch any of it. Stop trying to cram your fake sympathy down my throat for something that didn't affect me at all.

[He hates that. More than anything, he hates pity.]

Yeah? And? Nowhere in there did you manage to convince me you wouldn't sell out for a story.

Sympathy isn't in the same galaxy as what I'd like to cram down your throat right now.

[Especially not now.]

Luckily your sophomoric pretensions of cynicism have convinced me not to care. I know I won't. You can think whatever you damn well want.

Threatening a minor? There's some journalistic integrity for you. Bravo.

[SLOW CLAP.]

Breaking out the real ten cent words now. Guess that means I hit a sore spot.

You do not get to pull that shit, in so many different ways.

[And she just went from angry to downright furious.]

Just because I'd like to introduce my fist to your face doesn't mean I have any intention of wasting the time, much less the bones I'd probably break on your incredibly thick skull.

Also, I am exerting no pressure for or against a story, nor am I doing so on the clock. Between them, this has nothing to do with compromising myself for a story.

Groundless ad hominem is utterly clichéd for juvenile attacks. Get new material.

Classy.

Whatever, babe. I'm out. This got boring real fast.

[A mocking little salute, and then he disconnects.]

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