tushanshu | [video]

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[Brandon looks, for all intents and purposes, bored as hell.]

You know what this place really needs?

[Bit of a pause. Purely for dramatic effect, you understand. He is an actor.]

Twitter.

And if you have to ask me what that is, you're seriously dead to me. Like. Don't even try.

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[And so he does. Awkwardly.]

... So was this a bad idea or am I actually helping?

Dude, if I couldn't deal with guys being idiots who don't think, I'd've snapped a long time ago.

[Have you heard of Namor? You know, anything whatsoever about him?]

I mean, Rich is--was--oh, dammit.

[She digs the heel of her hand into her eye as the tears threaten to start again.]

You're the first person here I've told about all of this.

Is that a bad thing? I mean. It... sounds like it's probably something you need to talk about.

[pot, kettle. varying shades of obsidian.]

I didn't want to bug anybody, you know? None of my friends are here, and even if they were, they probably wouldn't be the people I remember.

[She flops down on a couch and hugs her knees to her chest.]

Even Rich--Nova. One minute he was this guy who just couldn't get his act together, the next he's running Nova Corps and I find out it's been years for him and he commanded the United Front during the Annihilation War. The Kree Empire and Galactus's Heralds were taking orders from him! He ended the war by ripping Annihilus's heart out through his throat! This was my loser boyfriend who couldn't even keep a job at a burger place!

[One wonders what Nita saw in the guy at the time--but apparently she's an excellent judge of potential.]

Hey. It's not bugging other people. I promise. You're... you're allowed to have problems, and no one can tell you how to deal with them but you, you know?

[Brandon: startlingly self-aware sometimes.]

And hey, for the record, jobs at burger places suck. Just saying.

[Nita half-smiles up at him.]

Careful, I might start thinking you're not a jerk.

[She gets a meditative look at his comment about minimum-wage jobs.]

I wouldn't know. I've never actually had a job, not like what people mean when they talk about jobs.

Don't pass it around.

[because really tho.]

Well what's a 'job' for you? Being royalty?

[Nita pantomimes zipping her lips. After a pause to indicate she's serious, she goes on to answer his question.]

Yeah, I guess you could say that? I'm close enough to the throne that I need to know how to rule if it comes to that. I'm on the King's Council, and the board of the Oracle Corporation...but I think Namor sold that after I...left.

[Time travel.]

Plus I was in school, and the New Warriors.

Sounds busy.

[... after a moment, and almost as if he's prompted by some outside force (otherwise known as his brain) he speaks again,]

I never had one either. A real job. Like. Same thing.

[He waves a hand.]

I guess it was? I never really noticed.

[Superhuman endurance and the world's most indefatigable personality. It's a lot easier not to get overwhelmed when next to nothing tires you out, physically or emotionally.]

But you're, like, 16. A lot of surface teenagers don't work.

[They go to school like on Welcome Back, Kotter!]

[He grimaces.]

Seventeen. And I mean-- I've been in showbiz since I was, I dunno, like a toddler or something. But I've never flipped... you know, burgers.

[Her mistake.]

That helps explain the attitude.

[She's actual royalty and she's not as much of a diva as you are, dude.]

What, the age or the occupation?

[... he's actually a little hurt by her comment but like hell is he showing it because Reasons.]

[He's lucky he's an actor or Nita would catch him.

And then apologize for hurting his feelings.

Brandon, you are really only screwing yourself here.]

The job. That whole [she waves one hand around] Johnny Storm vibe you've got.

[A future version of her dated Johnny, so it's a compliment. Mostly.]

I am way cooler than Johnny Storm, thanks. The Fantastic Four are so last year, anyway.

[... wait she's really overprotective of Richards, does that extend to the rest of them, too?]

-- I mean, they're cool I guess. But not my crowd.

[She sees what you did there, Brandon. And appreciates the non-jerk effort you're putting into this.]

Apparently in a couple years I'm gonna date him. ...Except not anymore.

[Time travel.

Also come on Johnny Storm is a total hunk, Brandon.]

The Four have been my friends since way back. I'm pretty sure Namor asked Doc Richards to check up on me when I was living on the surface.

[He wrinkles his nose.]

Time travel, huh? It's a bitch.

[But also: nbd. Because comics.

And he might be a hunk but Brandon is so far in the closet he's not even going to remotely come close to admitting it thanks.]

I thought they didn't get along? Or was that just the Sue thing?

It's a little more complicated than that. But basically.

[Moving on, 'cause who cares beyond the inconvenience, right? Nita makes a face because Namor your conduct is unbecoming.]

Uh, they've been mostly okay with each other for a while now, unless things changed while I was gone. Namor never really disliked Dr. Richards. He's just...stubborn.

[Understatement of the millennium.]

I don't even want to hear it.

[No really. The world is complicated enough as it is.]

Namor. The first mutant. Stubborn? You don't say.

People are shocked when I tell them, I know.

[She can do sarcasm, too.]

I feel like you should write a dramatic exposé on this topic. For strictly educational purposes.

[Namor probably wouldn't maroon her on an island for it or anything, right? Is that even a punishment to an Atlantean? What would be a punishment to an Atlantean?]

[Banishment, usually. It stings less when you can just move into the Baxter Building if you ask. In Nita's case, it would take approximately a day until Namor started feeling guilty, and a week until he swallowed his pride and reversed the edict. (Less if Sue called and yelled at him.)]

I am loyal to the throne, you know. I don't want to just give away sensitive information like that.

That's what pseudonyms are for, duh.

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