video;

[bacondivination]

Hello there, my dear fellow captives. I've missed you all so very much, and I'm sure the feeling has been quite mutual.

[ Loki sounds positively playful and is quite cheerfully smiling as he addresses whatever audience he might gather, though there's a contrasting uncharacteristicly careworn quality to his body language. ]

Blessed with good fortune is Loki, let me tell you. Though there was a little peril to my very soul for a few days, a clever rescue cleared that all right up. It put some things in perspective here, I think. Strange how it is I find myself with most everything I could possibly desire save that aforementioned threat of what I think may have been potentially erasure from reality.

By the by, my brother is here in duplicate-- handsome, muscular fellow, likes his hammer. You'll all get along well with Thor, everyone does. That goes especially for people that don't like me, few though you may be.

So how was your week? What did I miss? Was it terribly interesting?

Comments

[unconchonable]

Yeah, achiewed. [He says it so matter of fact, like there is no other possible way that one could be a god. Nope, he knows this shit. Better sit the fuck down, Loki.]

I understand the nature just fine, I coulda become one myself, but I ain't all about that poppycock. [Honestly he would just brag more if he did, so it's just better for the collective universes he didn't.]

God a lies? What a shitty thing to claim to be the deital force of.

[bacondivination]

Pfff, it's amazing. I have mischief going for me, too. You simply don't have an ounce of creativity if you think otherwise.

[unconchonable]

I got plenty a fuckin' creatiwity, I just don't need to showcase it with a bunch a stinkin' lies. Though, I guess mischief is a bit better.

[A pause.]

So... what? Do you just go around trollin' people? [People like Eridan.]

[bacondivination]

I do not troll. That's just racist.

[unconchonable]

[A flat stare.]

Do you ewen know what that means?

[bacondivination]

To act in the manner of trolls. I am of the frost giants as I totally just said moments ago.

[unconchonable]

I am well a-fuckin'-ware a what creature's brood you belong to, an' while trollin' does pertain to what we trolls do, it ain't a act that other species are incapable of. It's fuckin' rilin' people, pissin' 'em off, gettin' a rise outta them for nothin' other than your own enjoyment. Sounds pretty fuckin' mischief-y if you ask me.

If that ain't the case, then what sorta definition a mischief do you ewen go by?

[bacondivination]

I'll have you know that in my culture, we call that gianting

[unconchonable]

Whatewer, the meanin' is the fuckin' same either way you spew it.

[bacondivination]

Uh, 'whatewer' nothing. You need to take a more multiculturally sensitive approach to your time here in Turtleland.

[unconchonable]

[GLARING. Don't you mock his accent, you cur!]

I don't need to do anythin' other than what I bloody want.

[bacondivination]

Oh, there's no need to get windictive over me pointing out your shortcomings or anything. Werily, it's admirable to improve upon your more wulgar mannerisms and I am here to help. You'd not want to be treated as if you were no more than a wapid warmint.

[unconchonable]

Piss off you scumsuckin' piece a filth! [SNARLING.]

First of all, fuck you for your lousy mockery a my accent [speech impediment] and secondly, you ain't no moirail a mine, so you got no right to hawe any say ower what I do or how I conduct myself! I didn't ask for your so called 'help', and I newer fuckin' WILL ask for it. So shut your worthless trap!

[bacondivination]

Accent? So your whole race speaks that way? That's amazing. Comedy gold!

[unconchonable]

Well--no. Not my whole race.

[Only him, really.]

I fail to see the comedy in it.

[bacondivination]

You sound hilarious, and I say this as an Asgardian!

[ Mortals love to tease him for his accent and peculiarities of dialect. It certainly doesn't stop him from finding this hilarious. ]

Ask anyone. They'll tell you.

[unconchonable]

I don't giwe a shit if you're a ass-guardian. I fail to see the humor in my accent.

[He squints.] An' they better not say a word against my accent, if they know what's good for them.

[DO YOU FEEL THREATENED LOKI? Probably not.]

[bacondivination]

[ Loki chuckles at that. Totally threatened over here. ]

Yeah, yeah. Let me know how that goes for you when someone does.

[unconchonable]

I'm sure the unrestrained horror from the humans discowerin' a lifeless sack of a body will tell you well enough.

[Humans were such dramatic things, after all. Discover a corpse, freak out, etc. Like murder what scary or something, jeez.]

[bacondivination]

Oh, spooky. I'm so scared.

[unconchonable]

As you should be.