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[dow]

[ The vouchers on offer have been put to good use. Witness one Vulcan wrapped up in a couple of high-neck, long-sleeved sweaters where he sits in front of the screen. There's no way of regulating the temperature as accurately as he could on the Enterprise, so the curtains are also drawn to stave off the encroaching cold and, in the comfort of his own abode, he's donned a thick cardigan that looks like a customized blanket. Winter, nngh. So while Spock looks a lot fluffier, his tone is just as businesslike as usual. ]

Many of the foreign recipes I am familiar with have little bearing on the available ingredients in the market and as such may not be employed here. I would be grateful for suggestions on supplemental dishes and am willing to provide recompense for any assistance provided. On a different note, if there are any individuals with an inclination toward telepathy, I am curious as to whether any of them know where it would be most opportune to try and establish a meld with the turtle. That said, they would be welcome to participate in a psychic foray being made. I was told that this has never been attempted by a great number of minds and find the unexplored concept fascinating.

I am familiar with the weight of a great many consciousnesses and amenable to hosting temporary mental immersion with others.

[ In other words, Spock is happy to be the Red Ranger in a group setting where other minds might need to rely on him for direction or support. He goes on, lifting a hand-written stack of notes off his lap. ]

Ellie, I have compiled more information concerning space and attached a short questionnaire to serve as your homework. Please contact me at your earliest convenience to collect your personalized astronomy file.

Comments

[backinakidflash]

Interested in pizza or mac and cheese? Or, y'know... near approximations.

[dow]

What is the mac part of "mac and cheese"?

[backinakidflash]

Macaroni? Sheesh. If you don't know that, the food must suck where you're from. What did you think it was, some Irish guy that followed you home?

[dow]

I did not. [ So much to consider! ] I have never eaten mac and cheese before, not even when I lived on Earth.

[backinakidflash]

You've never had mac and cheese? How can you be that old and never have had it? What do they eat on Earth? Please don't tell me the Atkins and Paleo people took over the world and eliminated all refined grains.

[dow]

I am Vulcan. On Earth I was provided with the appropriate supplemental dietary needs of my species.

[backinakidflash]

[Bart shakes his head slowly.]

Your poor species. Is it a gluten or lactose thing? There's got to be some kinda work-around.

[dow]

I have simply never tried the dish in question. I cannot eat sucrose or meat, but neither of these stipulations currently factor when discussing mac and cheese.

[backinakidflash]

You can't eat sugar?!?

... well, OK. I'm not exactly supposed to have it either. How come you 'can't' have sugar or meat though? Friday night is mac and cheese night, by the way. You want some?

[dow]

As a Vulcan, I would fall ill. [ But wait, this is suddenly quite interesting, ] I was not aware Friday night owned such a distinction. Is this a human tradition?

[backinakidflash]

Ugh. Yeah. Good reason to avoid it. Hey! You should get Zatanna to do that thing! [Bart ducks off camera, and there are near-comical sounds of frantic rummaging. When he returns, he's holding up a smooth, black stone that's small enough to palm.] She figured out a way to enchant a rock so it'd glow when it was near tribble meat. Maybe she can do the same for sugar, right?

A human tradition? Well. Yeah. It kinda is? I mean it's not always Friday, and it's not always mac and cheese. But when people like something, a lot of times they set it to be the same night. Tuesday is spaghetti night - which it is here at Chez Bart's - or Wednesday night is comic book night. Except there aren't any comic books here, 'cept the ones that Billy has. Thursday's pizza night, too.

[dow]

[ He gives a nod to the black stone, intrigued by the 'enchanted' aspect of it. Maybe he can scan it, sometime. ]

That is a logical system to employ. [ Yes, good, well done and now this boy has his approval. ] Regimentation of a diet is never a bad idea.

[backinakidflash]

[Bart would let him, if asked.]

That's what I keep telling people! But. Everyone's always going 'no, Bart, it's not pizza night. Let's get sushi.' But I know that it's pizza night.

[... Bart is the most illogical-seeming person ever, really.]

[dow]

You should stand by your beliefs.

[ He respects that! ]

I am Spock, I do not believe we have met.

[backinakidflash]

Always do. I'm Bart Allen. Nice to meet you. So what's a Vulcan? And don't say you. I got that much. I mean like. What's your planet like? Never heard of Vulcans. I met a Coluan once.

[dow]

What is a Coluan?

[backinakidflash]

An alien? Duh.

[dow]

Your inability to answer and subsequent sarcasm suggests that you are being defensive and know nothing in great detail about them.

[backinakidflash]

Um. No to the defensive. As far as knowing things about Coluans, I know a Coluan. Querl Dox. I'd be a huge dick if I went around giving you huge sweeping generalizations based on one guy.

[dow]

Specifications about a species do not and should not relate to interpersonal accounts if accurately given.

[backinakidflash]

Oh. I'll do my best then. They're from the planet Colu - but they call it Yod. They're bipedal humanoids, and they have green skin. Um. They're all really smart, and they live for centuries. Is that the kind of stuff you wanted to know?

[dow]

It is, yes. As the senior science officer on the Enterprise, I am curious about others from different worlds.

[backinakidflash]

Makes sense. If it helps, they're members of the United Planets, which means they speak Interlac plus their native languages.

[dow]

[ A brow quirks. ]

Fascinating. [ Almost like the United Federation of Planets. ] Interlac is a trans-world language?

[backinakidflash]

Yeah. Spoken and written. Easier than having to keep dozens of translators around. Plus it means nobody's language is the official language. One less thing for everyone to fight about. And it's easier than English. Everything follows the rules. There's no exceptions.