tushanshu | text; regarding pretty much every turtle on the turtle

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text; regarding pretty much every turtle on the turtle

[Skulduggery doesn't spend quite as much time with Quintus as his fellow foster parents do, but Quintus still comes to him with the questions Hawke and Gazelle are either unwilling or unable to answer. That morning, Quintus came to Skulduggery asking if it was true that human babies 'hatched' and grew inside their mothers. He then asked if the act which created them went something like this, which Skulduggery saved him from having to demonstrate very quickly.

After a few more questions, Quintus admitted he'd been told by the other turtles, who'd been told by their foster parents. A combination of boredom and mild amusement make Skulduggery decide that it's his duty to issue a warning.]

The turtles are starting to wonder where life comes from. Apparently, one or more of them were given diagrams. I'm not sure who the perpetrator is, but I'm sure a general warning won't go unappreciated.

[OOC: This is in response to a thread where Solomon Wreath and Bakura basically give their turtles the Talk. News does travel fast, doesn't it? Feel free to have all the turtles questioning this in some fashion!]

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Quin-kun has been asking?

And demonstrating. You didn't have anything to do with it, did you?

No, we're still working on the fairy tales. I can talk to him about it if you don't want to though.

[So, so amused.]

I managed, thank you.

[The day a teenager is less inhibited about necessary explanations than a 400-year-old sorcerer...]

Un, okay! As long as he isn't confused anymore, ne?

Are you going to come to the beach with us this weekend?

He isn't. I can't say as much for the other turtles.

Do you need me there?

No, I don't think so! Quin-kun would like you to go, but he doesn't always need to get his way.

He has been rather insistent about it.

[Which is in no way saying Skulduggery will be there, but... let's be honest, Quintus is going to bug him until he is.]

So does that mean you're coming? ٩(●˙▿˙●)۶

Possibly.

[Maybe.]

There will be food and drinks! If skeletons need that sort of thing.

Edited 2014-08-11 03:05 (UTC)

We don't, but thank you for the consideration.

... Thanks for the heads-up.

It's what I'm here for.

[Half amused, half exasperated sound.]

Oh, for the love of--she managed to hold off for nearly a week, I suppose.

[Congratulations, Solomon, you managed to get Skulduggery to break out of text. He sounds resigned, yes, but mostly amused.]

I should have guessed you were to blame. Did you wait to be asked, or were you just particularly bored one day?

You say that as if I'm not a complete gentleman about the matter. She asked. She was also very alarmed by the idea that we were 'hatched' from our mothers full-grown, and demanded details to allay her fears.

Of course. You were the good Samaritan, then.

[You can hear just how much he thinks of that particular idea.]

[He shouldn't have even responded. He replies a little more coldly.]

Do forgive me. I forgot you thought you were the only one who had the right to care for children.

[Totally going to walk away from the console now please and thank-you.]

[He's leaving a message, in that case. It isn't the first time Wreath reacted so strangely to something Skulduggery meant in a somewhat good-natured fashion, and enough is enough.]

I think we need to talk.

[It takes a few hours. Actually, it takes half the day. Ordinarily Solomon would say outright 'no', but the burden of the knowledge he received from the knowledge-gate in the Dreaming has made that difficult. The part of him that wants to deny that knowledge has been winning so far--but there's another part of him that burns with curiosity for the truth.

"Why aren't you telling the other stories?", Skulduggery had asked, and Solomon hadn't even been able to answer. Nor had he wanted to. But lately he's been dreaming, and he can't tell how much is fact and how much is fiction, and even he knows there's only so long he can pretend it isn't happening at all.

[So, this time, with resignation, he replies.]

When and where?

How about tonight in the common room?

[They do live in the same building, after all.]

[He really doesn't want to be interrupted by their room-mate, but ... it's probably the wisest place.]

If Tazendra comes home I'm calling it off.

Fair.

[Have a flustered Enjolras, who found himself explaining a few things to Taraja earlier today. Specifically, explaining that sometimes humans mate for more than reproduction, and that they do not always do so in male and female pairs.]

Ah, that does clear things up a bit. Taraja had...some questions earlier. I...if any of the turtles begin asking about homosexuality, I am to blame. I did not give much INFORMATION, just that sometimes one prefers people of their own gender to the opposite one, but ah...if that...becomes an issue, I suppose you must all blame me.

[He was afraid things like this would start happening. Oh well.]

At least they won't see the need to ask Asti. Our journey could have taken quite a different route.

That WOULD be infinitely more complicated to deal with, yes. And I suppose sooner or later they'd have all begun asking as it is.

It's a miracle they haven't asked sooner.

[There's a little snort from Enjolras at that one, because, really. It is completely true.]

I quite agree with THAT. It does beg the question of how old they are now too. Do turtles have an adolescence? Mine was terrible. Mostly for my parents and my teachers. I would hope we could avoid that from them, if possible.

Better they learn it that way then walking in on someone.

[Just guess how he found things out.]

Of course. Also better that the various foster parents are prepared for having to explain, rather than dodging and misdirecting and giving them the impression they're not allowed to know.

[Because God knows they need a whole group of horse-sized turtles making it their sole mission in life to find out why no one's telling them how babies are made.]

I could always try to find a certain book that a friend of mine wrote. There were plenty of detailed descriptions in it people can use. Also some uses for tubers that make me never want to look at them again.

Let's leave that as a last resort, shall we?

I'll make sure any relevant hospital staff know to expect questions.

[From the way his voice catches and he quickly turns off the feed, he is still attempting to stifle gales of laughter--and this is after spending more than a little time trying to regain his composure.

A nightmare for a parent to actually have to answer in practice? Yes.

It's still hilarious--especially as long as it keeps happening to people not him.]

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