tushanshu | (no subject)

[The feed clicks on to reveal a red-headed teen with yellow eyes, who's currently peering at the device like it's going to explode.]

Okay, power button. Check. I thought this could be like that episode of The Twilight Zone where they execute people by blowing up in their rooms and that maybe someone was clever for a change and made the self-destruct button look like the on/off. But! Obviously not, because I'm still here.

I think I'm getting paranoid. It's like there's this voice in my head going -

[Bart holds two fingers up to either side of his head, so they stick up through his hair like ears.]

"Trust nothing."

[He puts his arms down, and he really drops them. They're just suddenly gone, and the camera picks up maybe two frames of the action, but even that's a little lost in a yellow flash. Bart only laughs with relief.]

Hey! Look at that, they weren't lying about that either. Now, if it would just hurry up and work all the time.

So, uh. Hi. Bart Allen. Anyone know where to find the games on this thing? I gotta pass the time until the rest of you slow down.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Don't worry. You'll only need to stage an intervention if I stop telling jokes.

Is that something you guys need a lot?

I don't know. I'm the only one in danger of it back home.

So, anything your source left out that I might be able to answer for you?

Yeah, he left out the part where you're younger than we are. But I'm gonna say you're sick of having that one pointed out. This place is crazy, but everyone else seems chill about it so I'm gonna go with the flow for now. I figure I'll either pick up enough that it'll make sense or, you know, the nonsensical nature of living on a giant turtle will drive me insane like the rest of you.

Any nosy questions to prove who I am?

Hey, I'm perfectly sane. [Sort of.]

No, not really. I don't know you, so I wouldn't know what to ask anyway. Being a speedster is proof enough anyway. They're not exactly common.

Normally? Yeah.

Huh. I guess not, but it's like we're crawling out of the woodwork at home.

Crawling out of the woodwork in the good way or the bad way?

[An army of evil speedsters? No thanks.]

The good way. Mostly.

[The good still outnumber the bad.]

I'll definitely take "mostly."