1, video

[skybluejeep]

[A pair of big brown doe eyes are peering into the camera at extreme closeup, like he's trying to dive into the lens and spot people on the other side. Finally, the eyes pull back, and the video focuses on the rest of the face to go along with the eyes. It's a teenager, with a really weird and ambivalent expression on his face. In the background are his new digs, still shiny and new and clean, and obviously a suite in the Earth sector.]

Wow, okay. This Skype connection is weird, it says I'm on but it's not giving me any user names or pings or anything. It's either broken or I'm doing it wrong, either of which is possible, I guess.

Um.

Yeah, so, I'm Stiles, I'm seventeen, I'm new here and I'm apparently dead. Or something, maybe not. Gotta love that whole hot mess. I thought the afterlife was supposed to be a bit more, you know, well-defined and concrete. ...For an ethereal possibility that's never been proven, except on bad basic cable "Reality" shows.

[Oh, the sarcasm.]

Anyway. Okay, this is a long shot, but does the town name Beacon Hills mean anything to anybody here? Maybe? Beacon Hills, California? 94166? Yes? Holla at yo hometown. ...Please?

Comments

[Video]

[tactile_telekinesis]

[Hello! His reply starts with Kon sitting at his desk with a trashed room behind him in the background that looks like the awesomest treehouse ever. Both from months of living here and an earlier outburst, feel free to ignore.]

Nice starter there, very dating profile.

I thought the afterlife was gonna be blue skies and sandy beaches with mandatory topless babes playing volley ball. Not everyone's dead here. Some are. Or were.

[There's a pause as he thinks for a moment and then shakes his head.]

California, yeah. Beacon Hills, no.

[Video]

[skybluejeep]

[He barks a quick laugh at that, and rolls his eyes.]

I also like long walks on the beach and my turn-offs include smoking and not liking dogs. But...yeah! That's what I'm talking about. My heaven was supposed to involve me, a Ferrari and a mansion on the French Riviera, with my wife Lydia at my side.

So I guess I'm just gonna pretend I'm one of those "maybe" dead people, since I don't feel dead.

...Okay. No Beacon Hills. Thanks. Crap.

video;

[eye_of_isis]

Not Skype, sad to say. Nor are you dead, unless you remember dying or something because--and take it from someone who's spent far too much time in the afterlife for a living thirteen year old--this isn't the afterlife.

video;

[skybluejeep]

Okay, okay. Seriously helpful, thank you! Those people back at that...place I woke up in earlier today. They said this was "between dreaming and death" and then after my absolutely understandable freak out, they said I 'might not be' a corpse. Which, yeah, can't remember dying, think I'd remember something like that.

Un-...less I wouldn't because I died of a massive brain injury. Crud, never thought of that.

Video;

[cravats]

[Lyall smiles, showing a pair of rather pointed canines. Not quite vampire fangs, but pronounced.]

I don't believe it's broken, young man. That simply seems to be the way it functions. Welcome to Keeliai- I've heard of California, but I'm not familiar enough with it to know any smaller cities.

[He's British. And, apparently, from the reign of Queen Victoria, judging by his clothes.]

And there is a significant probability that you're not dead. Don't despair.

Video;

[skybluejeep]

Yeeeeeeah, working on the whole 'non-despair' thing. Since, like, I have no friends or family here and it's more than a little freaky to suddenly find myself living alone.

On the back of a turtle.

The size of Sri Lanka.

video;

[storm_warning]

Beacon Hills? Welcome to Turtle Hell. Population is way too many.

[Ororo's still got sass no matter that she's got half an armful of tribbles on the happen.]

And you're way wrong side of the country from me. Closest I've been is Texas.

video;

[skybluejeep]

[He peers at her through the camera, and then nods a little bit.]

Turtle Hell. Accurate name is accurate.

And...Texas? I'm sorry.

video;

[zerotoawesome]

Yeah, this is kind of a terrible Skype knockoff. Then again, the "internet" [air quotes] is kind of a letdown here. No porn or anything, really.

video;

[skybluejeep]

...You are kidding me.

[He sounds genuinely upset about that. But but but the internet is for porn. Trekkie Monster said so!]

video;

[crotcharrow]

Worst thing about this place, hands down.

[Of course, the mental image of Santo getting his rocks off so to speak, not the best.]

video;

[fatedchaos]

You're only dead if you remember dying. Otherwise, you're like most of us. [Vanessa shrugs.] Alive, in another dimension. Welcome to the multiverse.

video;

[skybluejeep]

Yeah, that's what everybody's saying.

It's like, way to take a decade off some poor teenager's life, telling him he might be dead.

Video

[alpha_squad_leader]

You're not dead, just in a city on the back of a giant turtle.

And sorry but I've never heard of Beacon Hills.

Video

[skybluejeep]

Man, I know Beacon Hills is a small town, but this is ridic.

So, uh. You must be the lizard guy that rock dude was talking about.

[ozones]

Being dead is just once explanation. And not the most accurate one.

I've never heard of Beacon Hills, but California's a good starting point if you're trying to figure out how similar your world is, to other people's.

[skybluejeep]

Got that by now, yeah. It's, um. Yeah, I kinda freaked out, and can you blame me for it?

Glad to hear most everybody has heard of California. It's only the third largest state in the nation. It has a bear on its flag, and that's just too awesome to be lost.

Video;

[parallels]

Right to dead out of all three options. Cheery. But you're bet on this being the after life is only good one out of three. And I'm not sure I'd go with that being a giant turtle city.

[A pause.]

But you're definitely stuck. Away from any life you have so I dunno if that's really coming out on top.

Video;

[skybluejeep]

I have two volumes; 11 and asleep. Of course I went right to "dead," I have no middle gear.

Yeah, I got that. The stuck part. Stuck and everybody seems to have powers but me. Do you have any powers?

video

[sophos]

You're only dead if you've died back home. It's not the afterlife, either, though I'm sure you've gotten that several times by now.

The console you're using isn't exactly like the internet, but it is connected to every other console - there's one in every suite, and a recent upgrade introduced inboxes. You can track people through their console IDs, but that's about it.

video

[skybluejeep]

[He points at the lens, and has an intense look on his face.]

YES! This! This is helpful. Thank you so much. I've got names and console numbers linked, now. I appreciate it.

What's your name?

video

[crotcharrow]

Pretty sure I'm not dead and it's not the only reason you'd be here. In my world, we call waking up in an alternate dimension 'Tuesday'.

[He snorts.]

But yeah. No skype, no YouTube, not even fansites you can troll. It blows.

video

[skybluejeep]

Wow. I mean, there's Batman. Which is awesome. But there's no fun stuff to do. Maybe that's what I need, I'll just start a Batman fan site.

video;

[urbanmagic]

Nah, it's not broken. Just needs a bit of a layout tweak.

You know, people have very weird views of the Afterlife. Personally, I prefer the turtle. He's been awfully accommodating as far as limbos go. I know California, does that count?

video;

[skybluejeep]

Honestly, I was kinda hoping that if I ever ended up in some sort of 'retaining my consciousness' afterlife, I'd at least be able to see my mom. No such luck.

I'm glad you know Cali. Cali is a magical land.

[video] kind of late so feel free to ignore!

[witchnotwarlock]

If the last thing you remember is getting some kind of sword through the gut, or a bullet to the head, then you might be dead? But if not, you're probably alive! Or in a coma.

I think coma works, too. Oh, and by the way? Reality shows are hilarious to watch.

[video] i ignore nothing!

[skybluejeep]

Coma. Oh, good. Coma wasn't an option I'd considered. Damn it.

I think my favorite reality shows are the ones on The Learning Channel. Because it's not about learning in the least, it's about straight-up voyeurism. It's shameless and dirty and I love it.