text;

[unfettered]

[Encrypted to castmates.]

[Erica doesn't bother with video or audio for this. She doesn't want to encourage conversation in which she has to actually speak and have people hear how she sounds when she does. It may be obvious that she's hiding behind text but considering circumstances, she doubts that anyone will blame her.]

I know what you were all hiding from me now.
I'm not mad. I get why you all did it.
But I know now so you can all breathe a sigh of relief or whatever.
If you have something to say, say it now, but I'm not interested in having any lengthy discussions after this.

[And hopefully they'll understand if she's a bit withdrawn for a while, because as much as her text says that she's not mad, it doesn't mean she's not emotional. It doesn't mean she's done coping with her now acutely uncomfortable sense of mortality.]

Comments

text; encrypted;

[unfettered]

I know. You told me before. He knows now though, doesn't he? Saw someone let something slip.

text; encrypted;

[bereavements]

Yeah. He does. Allison told him. She didn't know. We kept it from you because we didn't think you needed to know. We were protecting you.

text; encrypted;

[unfettered]

It was nice having these few months with you guys and like I said, I get the motivations but...you wouldn't have kept it from me forever, would you?

I mean, the Emperor plans on sending everyone home when this whole mess is over. Would you have waited until you all went home to say "By the way Erica, you're dead back home so we're all leaving you here where you can be alive but alone" or something?

text; encrypted;

[bereavements]

I don't know. I honestly don't know.

text; encrypted;

[unfettered]

Yeah. I guess I wouldn't either.

[And that's really all she can think to say without another topic or expansion of their current topic being introduced.]

text; encrypted;

[bereavements]

I thought about telling you. We all did. But, I didn't want to hurt you. Like, needlessly hurt you. It seemed cruel. How do you tell someone they die?

And I'm not making excuses.

text; encrypted;

[unfettered]

I get it. I should probably be glad for the time I had before I found out.

If it happens again...I don't know. I'd like to say you should set them down and try to break it as gently as possible, but they weren't kidding when they said ignorance is bliss.

There's no good outcome already so I guess the only thing you can hope for is that they don't have it dropped on them in some sort of horrible way.

text; encrypted;

[bereavements]

Was this dropped on you in a horrible way?

text; encrypted;

[unfettered]

No. Derek just...told me. Straightforward. Honest.

text; encrypted;

[bereavements]

Are you mad he told you

text; encrypted;

[unfettered]

I don't know. I was at one point, but I couldn't have been in the dark forever. So I guess not. More mad I'm dead.