[video]

[highprofilerichkid]

[A dark-haired kid who seems to be in his late teens appears on screen. He smiles, but it looks a bit forced.]

Hey. Tony Stark. [He gives a small wave.] I just... got here, I guess, and got the rundown on the whole scary death chaos monster situation. And all the giant magic turtle stuff. Sounds like a good time. [He laughs awkwardly, and rubs the back of his neck.] Better than centipede monster void dimensions, at least, [he mutters. This is not the first time he’s been suddenly yanked into a different dimension, evidently.]

Anyway, uh, if anyone needs some tech stuff or heavy lifting done, hit me up. I haven’t had a chance to take a close look at the tech here yet, but I’m sure I’ll figure it out. [He seems to brighten a little at the prospect of new alien technology to play with.

He looks like he’s about to cut the feed, but then he hesitates. There’s a couple seconds of anxious silence, and he fidgets, his cheerful demeanor faltering even more.] And, um, just out of curiosity... When they send us back home, there’s... There is something to go back to, isn’t there? [He laughs, but it’s nervous, like he’s not sure he wants to know the answer.] Nobody would really give me a straight answer, but... They’re not going to send us back if we’re just about to... Well, you know, get blown up or something. Right? I mean, that would be pretty messed up.

Comments

[skeletonenigma]

[... Ah. Yes. Whoops. The feed cuts off, and the next time Tony sees Skulduggery's face it's that of a very thin black man with high cheekbones. So ignore the icon. >_>]

Was I? The consoles must still be malfunctioning. Have you actually been to a centipede monster void dimension?

[Because people are more likely to answer your questions when you don't need to explain your entire existence to them first.]

[highprofilerichkid]

Riiiight. The consoles must have an x-ray setting. Could happen to anyone. [Ha ha, Skeleton Man, nice try. Maybe it's different where you're from, but on Tony's planet, most people have developed object permanence by the time they're 18. You're not fooling him with the console peek-a-boo.

But what does he know? Maybe in Skeleton Person Land it's rude to comment on a person's de-skinned skeleton. He'll play along. For now.]

Centipede monster void dimension? Oh, sure. I got a first-class ticket to the domain of a big ugly bug called Yogthulu -- courtesy of a guy named Doctor Doom, if you can believe it. Turns out abominations from other dimensions aren't always totally up-front when making deals with humans, though. Which is why I'm here, and Doom is trapped in the void playing patty-cake with a three-hundred-foot-long centipede.

[skeletonenigma]

Doctor Doom. [Does he sound amused? He definitely looks amused.] It sounds like he got what he deserved.

[But, like 'Tony Stark,' the name sounds familiar. Skulduggery just isn't quite sure why. It sounds like it comes out of a story somewhere.]

Alternate dimensions aren't new to you, then, I take it.

[highprofilerichkid]

I'll say. The guy was a supervillain mad scientist and a dictator. I don't think anybody's missing him.

[Tony shrugs.] I wouldn't say I'm an expert, but I've seen enough to know that they exist. [Before he got here, that is. Obviously he knows that they exist now that he's in one.] Though this one is a lot nicer than the others I know about. Our dimensional neighborhood back home seems to run to... voids. Voids with centipedes, voids without centipedes, but mostly a whole lot of empty space. And the occasional centipede.

[skeletonenigma]

[He laughs.] If anyone in my world talks about starting dimensional exploration parties, I'll be sure to let them know about the centipedes.

[And that, unfortunately, is more of a possibility than Skulduggery would like it to be.]

To answer your question, yes, our worlds will probably still be there when we return. Unless we lose this war, in which case we'll probably be stuck in an endless void broken only by the occasional centipede. [He sounds disturbingly cheerful when he says it.] Luckily, you'll have an advantage there.

[highprofilerichkid]

Don't forget to mention the eyes. There's like, fifteen of them. [Tony holds his hands up to his forehead and wiggles his fingers in a comical impression of a creepy, buggy, multi-eyed face.] I don't know what anyone needs that many eyes or that many legs for, but I bet it's nothing good.

[Tony laughs at Skeleton Guy's cheerful crack about the unbroken centipede void. Ha ha! ...He is joking, right?]

[skeletonenigma]

[No. No, not really.

Sorry, Tony.]

You have regular encounters with giant centipedes, but you still have problems with turning on your console to see a talking skeleton? [Because they're totally mutually inclusive, aren't they?]

[highprofilerichkid]

Not regular, just the once. And let me tell you, that was more than enough. [He shudders and makes a face. Giant centipedes: seriously gross.]

Anyway, giant centipedes and animate skeletons are in completely different categories of weird. Giant centipedes are "freaky alien" weird. Talking skeletons are "crazy magic bullshit" weird. Uh... No offense.

[skeletonenigma]

[He laughs.] None taken. I am kept alive through magic, as it happens.

[highprofilerichkid]

Yeah. Magic. Sure. [He says it in that "hahaha, good one, Skeleton Man!" tone again.

At this point, Tony is still operating under the paradigm of Clarke's Third Law, and he's not quite ready to believe that magic - real magic - exists, even in other universes.

For the moment, he files Skeleton Man away in the same category as the animate statues that had guarded some of the Makluan temples. Animate skeleton, animate statue: pretty much the same thing, right?]

So what's with the skin suit, then? Is that just to keep people from wigging out when they run into you at the bar?

[skeletonenigma]

In a manner of speaking.

[There's a small symbol carved into the collarbone underneath Skulduggery's shirt collar. He reaches up to touch it, and the facade flows back off his skull like water - or like a projection being switched off. He tilts his head, and then touches it again, and a completely new face flows back up, snapping into place with the relatively recent smoothness of prolonged use.]

It's not a skin suit. It's more of an illusion. A very tangible and realistic illusion.

[highprofilerichkid]

Oh, that is so creepy, [Tony says, but he's grinning.] Illusion, huh? I got my ass handed to me a couple times by somebody who could make solid light holograms. Good tech. [He examines the new face that Skeleton Man is now wearing.] So do you have a whole bunch of different face templates to choose from?

[skeletonenigma]

I do, but I can't choose from them. They're random.

[He's wearing a small smile now, one that's one part amusement and one part curious confusion. He can't claim to know much about technology - or to care very much about it at all, in fact - but he's proud of his facade faces. He'd like to avoid giving out the wrong impression, particularly if that impression is that he's cheating.] Solid light holograms?

[highprofilerichkid]

Random? So what, you might wake up one morning looking like George Clooney and the next looking like Steve Buscemi, and you don't have any control over it at all? That must be exciting for your friends.

[Sounds like a design flaw, if you ask Tony, but he has a hunch that saying so might be considered rude.

He's not sure how to answer Skeleton Man's query about solograms.] Hard light holograms... They're... well, they're holograms you can touch. Light acting like matter. It's pretty advanced stuff. [He's not sure he'll be able to explain hard light to a layman. It gets into some pretty esoteric branches of physics.]

[skeletonenigma]

[Dryly:] Very exciting, I imagine.

[Valkyrie's mentioned something of the sort several times, anyway.]

I'll bet. I can guarantee you, though, that this - [he points to his own false face] - is not a hard light hologram. [And he knows for a fact that the magic's creator would take very hard offence to the suggestion that she had used anything but pure magic. Especially technology of any kind. Artists were strange that way.] It's magic.

[highprofilerichkid]

Sure. Same principle, though. [Hard light is hard light, no matter how it's generated. Whether you call it a sologram or a tangible illusion, the end result is the same.

But Skeleton Man is very insistent about the magic. Is he actually serious...? People keep mentioning magic in this offhand way, like Harry Potter wand-waving is a fact of everyday life here.

He's going to ask Aya about this. She seems to be the tech-savviest foreigner he's met so far. Surely she'll be able to tell him how much of this "magic" is just very advanced technology and how much of it is... something else.]

[skeletonenigma]

Same principle? [His head tilts.] Are you trying to claim that solid light holograms and magic are the same thing?

[highprofilerichkid]

[Tony shrugs.] Different mechanisms, maybe. But light behaving a certain way is what it is, even if you can get it to act that way through a bunch of different methods. A holographic projector and... magic are still producing the same image, right? It's not like you're using an entirely different kind of photon or something.

[Magic. It's going to be very frustrating if people around here wave their hands and say "magic!" at anything unusual or unexplained. That sounds way too much like, "it's too complicated, you wouldn't understand." Whenever anybody had said that to Tony in the past, they'd invariably been wrong.]

[skeletonenigma]

[He inclines his head, visibly impressed. Skulduggery doesn't know very much about physics in general, but he knows enough to understand what Tony is talking about - particularly since sorcerers have become more and more interested lately in trying to answer those very same questions.]

True. There's a very good chance the sort of magic I use has a firm basis in what we know about the natural world. [He clicks his fingers to summon a flame into his palm.] Magic provides the energy, but I can't do this from nothing. I need heat, or a spark.

[highprofilerichkid]

Unless you're in a universe without causality or physical constants, everything has to follow natural laws. If something doesn't seem like it's following the rules, it just means you don't know all the rules yet.

[Tony's eyes widen at the fireball, and he gets a thoughtful look on his face.] "Magic" must just be a different way to naturally manipulate physical forces. There are people in my universe who can do things like that without technology because of their biology, so... maybe in some universes that's easier, or there are different ways to access that type of ability.

[Okay, magic's not so hard to wrap his head around when he frames it like that.]

[skeletonenigma]

[He shrugs.] I don't claim to know all the rules. I only know what I'm capable of doing, and that if a scientist were to get a hold of it back in my world, I'd be locked away for study.

[At least until his friends broke him out.]

Do you have an explanation for my being dead, then?

[highprofilerichkid]

Man, [Tony chuckles,] I still don't have an explanation for how a skeleton can have a consciousness without a brain. Don't ask me how death works in your crazy skeleton universe. There are enough wacky rules about death in this universe that I still have to figure out. Get back to me in a few weeks and maybe I'll have some theories for you.

[skeletonenigma]

[He's a young and slightly less crotchety version of Kenspeckle Grouse. It's almost adorable. It certainly makes Skulduggery chuckle.] In that case, I'll get back to you in a few weeks. Glad I could be of service.

[highprofilerichkid]

['Scuze u Skul, he is an eighteen-year old billionaire genius superhero adult, he is not "adorable." Yes he is, he's such an adorkable little nerd boy, bless him.]

Sure thing, Skeleton Man. Thanks for the, uh... "Magic 101" lesson. I guess I'll see you around. [It's not a very big city, and a dapper-suited animate skeleton isn't exactly easy to overlook.]