[CONSOLE] video; BACKDATED to 8 JUNE

[gistful]

[When Anton turns on the video he looks a little ruffled. His tie is gone, jacket off, sleeves rolled up, and there's blood on his vest, for the observant. His expression is flat but with an edge of exasperation, and behind him ... Behind him is Skulduggery and Erskine. They're bound together with a five-foot length of chain, Erskine with a manacle on his wrist and Skulduggery with a manacle around his neck-bones.

[Skulduggery is missing his hat, and his suit is tattered. Erskine's in obviously clean clothes, but he's missing a jacket, he's limping slightly, his arm is in a sling and he has a spray-bottle. And they're arguing. Loudly. Anton's voice is raised to be heard over them and, perhaps notably, he keeps his hands out of view of the camera.]

Let it be publicly known that these two reprobates are grounded.

[He jerks his head at them without looking around.]

If anyone sees them on the streets while Erskine, that's the ridiculously pretty one, is not wearing a dog-collar, please punch them both and return them to the Midnight Hotel. If anyone finds them not in the company of each other, please, again, punch them and return them to the Midnight Hotel.

Rest assured that the damages they caused will be repaired at their expense and any loss of revenue reimbursed. We'll be by in the next few days to arrange this.

[Pause.]

Ah. Yes. Skulduggery, that's the idiot who's forgotten his skin, has lost his hat privileges. No hats for Skulduggery. Thank you.

[This broadcast is also available as action, for those staying at the Midnight Hotel.]

Comments

THREADJACK if that's ok >>;

[edgeoftheknife]

[Someone overheard this, and is raising his voice to be heard from behind Anton.]

Can I glue hair clips to his skull?

action;

[gistful]

No.

[Without even looking over his shoulder.]

[edgeoftheknife]

A sparkly headband, then?

[gistful]

Only if you wear its twin.

[edgeoftheknife]

I don't do sparkles. The 1970's notwithstanding.

[skeletonenigma]

[He could be absolutely terrible right now.

But, for once in his life, he's not going to be.]

I realise I'm dead, but could we at least make an effort to remember that I can still hear you?

[edgeoftheknife]

Oh, you are still there. I didn't recognize you without your hat.

[skeletonenigma]

Good. Maybe you can help me convince Anton withholding hats is a cruel and unusual punishment.

[edgeoftheknife]

What, like refusing to completely heal the only one of us with flesh?

[skeletonenigma]

Flesh wounds heal. Good style, on the other hand, is irreplaceable.

[gistful]

Then you do, in fact, do sparkles, don't you?

[edgeoftheknife]

It was New York in the seventies. You couldn't breathe without inhaling glitter. Not my fault.

[gistful]

Methinks ye doth protest too much.

[edgeoftheknife]

Okay, fine. Whatever. I may have briefly done sparkles.

But it was so worth it.

[gistful]

But it wouldn't be again?

[edgeoftheknife]

If you manage to re-create Studio 54, let me know. I could perhaps be persuaded to reconsider my stance on sparkles for that.

always okay!

[unetrustworthy]

[...now there was a mental image.]

I'm certainly not going to do it.

[edgeoftheknife]

Yeah, I... probably won't either. I enjoy my skin in the shape that it's in now--

[Glancing down at the sling on his arm]

--well, more or less. I'd prefer not to lose any more of it. Although maybe if it's that cheap school paste that comes off right away? He can't get too sore about that, can he?

[unetrustworthy]

[She couldn't help noticing the arm, since he did draw attention to it.]

What happened?

[edgeoftheknife]

What, this? I, ah... may have gone through a plate glass window.

[unetrustworthy]

[May have?]

[People were usually far more sure of that sort of thing.]

Were you aware the glass window was there when you went through it? ...or did somebody "help" you?

[edgeoftheknife]

Somebody helped me. [sideways glare at Skulduggery] And I'd prefer to avoid any more help for the foreseeable future. Which I suppose rules out the paste and the hair clips.

[unetrustworthy]

[What great friends you have.]

But not publicly antagonizing him over the Network?

[edgeoftheknife]

[The best, clearly!]

He did throw me through a plate glass window. And shoot me. I think I deserve at least a little retribution, don't you?

[unetrustworthy]

...he shot you?

[It honestly took more self restraint than she thought possible to resist the urge to ask what did you do? in response.]

Why?

[A compromise.]