tushanshu | Second Guitar Solo - [Video] Eddie Riggs

I figure this isn't exactly gonna work, but- it's worth a shot. You know, for prosperities sake. Hell it worked in the last place I was at, with mixed results, but whatever.

[He takes a slow centering breath, closing his eyes as silence falls over the feed. The silence lingers for a few moments more before Eddie suddenly claps his hands together, the loud noise probably startling anyone actually watching the video. His eyes staying closed as he begins to speak.]

Oh, holy, mean green and scaly giant turtle carryin' us around. That sounds good, right? You think you could like- send us home or some shit? It'd be appreciated oh, uh mighty turtle guy- or girl. Equal turtle rights, man. No discrimination for turtles, hell no.

Like, we'll solve your problems or whatever. As long as it doesn't involve stupid shit or too much terrible death, I kinda like livin'. Just like give us some fuckin' clue to what is goin' on since everyone is intent on being vague as fuck. You're like, a giant turtle so you can be honest, right?

Yeah?

[There is just silence for a moment, but Eddie doesn't seemed deterred by it as he keeps going.]

Okay, cool. We'll- give you, the fuck do turtles eat, lettuce and carrots. Giant pieces of lettuce and carrots in return and save the day too, cause I guess we're here for that apparently. Just give us a sign. Like, a good one, not that oblique shit like turtle faces on toast. That would be kinda weird.

Uh, am-turtle-men.

[Eddie opens an eye looking around. Letting the silence go on a moment before sighing.] Okay, no earth shatterin' kaboom or sign, so probably didn't work? Damn it. So much for that.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Less confused and more aimin' for possibly gettin' us somewhere. [Eddie doesn't seem particularly bothered by Raph's tone.] Eh, even if he-she, zhe didn't have a thing like this it's worth tryin'.

Considerin' it might be a giant vaguely normal turtle, it might be tempted by vegetables. I kind doubt pot roast or burritos would appeal to a giant turtle.

[Wow. He's actually serious, isn't he?]

If you really wanna get somewhere, take it to the Emperor. She's the one at the wheel of this crazy-train. And what about a humongous turtle with a whole city on its back strikes you as "normal"?

[Also, you happen to be speaking to a giant turtle who loves burritos, thank you very much.]

Yeah, far as I've heard the Emperor is a bit choosey about what she answers. Honesty isn't exactly her policy. [Also doesn't help the last Emperor he conversed with killed his girlfriend, Eddie has some issues with royalty.] Don't mind me if I prefer askin' someone else about it.

Well, A. far as I've seen, it hasn't exactly done much beyond swim around, kind normal. Just a lot bigger.
[Eddie's noticed, he has little to really say on the matter.] B. could be weirder, could be a demon turtle or undead. That would be weird.

[He'll take this over the giant freakin' zombie turtle any day.]

Yeah, right. Let me know if you get any answers. But I still think you're gonna get way more out of the Emperor.

[Personally, he can't wait to get his hands on her.]

yeah, but I can't bribe the Emperor with lettuce. She'd probably want my soul or some shit. I kinda need my soul, I'm usin' it, somehow.

[Eddie wishes Raph luck with that, since he doesn't trust the Emperor enough to even try.]

[Too bad he'll probably fail miserably no matter what.]

Okay, maybe we shouldn't have to give away our souls, but I still say we got to do more than just sittin' around prayin' the giant turtle's gonna bail us out.

Edited 2013-01-17 08:48 (UTC)