tushanshu | oo1

[ It's a little too late to adhere to that whole non-interference clause of the Prime Directive, being the subject of an alien-napping and all, so here is Spock in all his pointy-eared glory. Looking as straight-faced as possible. Unlike Kirk, he didn't part from their meeting and then drink himself under a table, he stayed up all night watching network conversations and Sciencing. It would be illogical to... wallow, and he refuses to acknowledge that he even has the urge. ] ... Fascinating.

[ For such ancient technology, this thing appears remarkably serviceable. ] Greetings. I am Commander Spock, of the United Federation of Planets. If I understand correctly, then you are my fellow... detainees. [ There, that's politic enough. ] I would like to request information on what is being done with the crashed satellite debris. In return, I may be of some assistance in constructing something useful from it, as I am familiar with this level of technology.

In addition, any information on the turtle itself would be appreciated; the scans I have taken of the creature only tell me so much, and the indigenous people seem... disinclined to reply to my queries.

[ Aaaand he'll just give a sharp nod and the Vulcan Salute on his way out. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

What hypothesis would you be testing, exactly?

[ spock is still looking at his life and looking at his choices ]

[Uhhh...] The elasticity of pointy Vulcan ears versus non-pointy human ears, and its potential effects on one's hearing accuracy.

Such things have already been tested and proven, I can send you the relevant data if you would like.

[ Leo no, Spock was a teacher, he can smell bullshit coming from a mile away. ]

[LE SIGH] Fine, I just wanted to—wait, seriously; they have?

[ it takes a practiced ear to hear it but omg Spock is so smug rn ] Of course. Biological differences between all Federation species are well cataloged for medical purposes.

Right. [look at his face look at how much he believes you] So do you like, have those things—papers, whatever—here? Can I take a look?

Certainly. I will send you the relevant documentation shortly. [ And he does!! And it's a text file with a super long, super, super dry medical dissertation on the differences between Vulcan and human hearing inside I'm so sorry Leo.

PS he expects you to read the entire thing. ]

[O M G

Three sentences in and he already wants to kill himself from boredom

Not to mention he's getting a little cross-eyed because LOL DYSLEXIA

Also not sure if you are still just really into all this cosplay/LARPing shit or if you are Actual Spock???]

Dude. Ever tried writing with a little bit more humor in it?

[ HOW CAN HE GET YOU TO BELIEVE HIM LEO ]

Medical dissertations are not the place for "humor."

[ the way he says it makes it clear he thinks there is no place for humor anywhere

FUN IS ILLOGICAL ]

[Spock lbr here is this actually you]

You've never tried having fun once, like, ever, have you? Or has someone told you a super terrible joke that made you swear off jokes forever?

Edited 2013-06-15 02:18 (UTC)

[ OH GOD IT'S SO ACCURATE ]

I do not see how that is relevant, here.

[I KNOW RIGHT

also S I G H.]

Man, come on, unless your intent is to put every single one of your readers to sleep, you gotta do something to keep them attentive. Jokes are always a good way to liven up your essay a little, you know, keep them from not wanting to punch you in the face for being so boring.

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