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[Hello, Turtle. Here is an Enjolras who looks a bit embarrassed that he's even started this late night/very early morning post, but well. The question he wants to ask IS actually a valid one, now that he has TIME to ask it, and he finds the current most popular phrases to be incredibly awkward or childish so..The hell with it. People have asked all sorts of questions here, haven't they? He's clearing his throat, flushing a little, then glancing into the vid directly and clearing his throat.]

A question, everyone.

I find that most of the current terms for one's...romantic friend...but more than such are either juvenile or not quite accurate. 'Boyfriend' for example, makes us sound as if we were children, 'Partner' has several connotations that do not immediately state the obvious and 'Lover' sounds particularly awkward.

[And well, they have not quite gotten to the lovers stage yet. Enjolras is hardly ready for it and still accustoming himself to the kissing and cuddling things that he never let himself seek out in life.]

When others here speak of the other piece of their soul as he is to me...what terms seem to work best for you?

[He will deny this video happened later. He really will. He just...really wishes to know and can't sleep so...here it is. Have fun with it?]

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I do. Pity we have never had the chance. There is nothing to do but to hypothesize.

[Probably. But under that would be an understanding.]

It is, quite. It would have been interesting, certainly.

[Interesting. to say the least there, Enjolras.]

Well there is always hope he will return.

Perhaps so at that. There ARE things I would say to him at any rate.

[Not that Enjolras knows EXACTLY what he'd say. But he knows the GIST of them.]

I am sure you would. We all have things we would say to those that left us.

[She even had things to say to her parents, to Cosette.] Or to those that we are leaving. [Her confessions to Marius, after all, were not forgotten by her, even if he had been the one to forget.]

Like those things I would have wished to say to Marius, in those who we are leaving, yes.

[Things that have little to do with what they've fallen into here, though that's confirmed his thoughts on a few of those matters. The man's courage, which he had first seen at the barricades namely, but also the desire to tell him to live the life he wished to, even if it is not one Enjolras would agree with himself. That one, well. Better not to bring it up.]

Some of those things are far better left unsaid here somehow, though others I might manage. But yes, I have other things I would have, should have said.

If I have a major regret in our deaths, it is not letting them know what they meant to me when I had the moments. It is said that people we care for can know, but it would have been best for them to hear it. Well, those who are here know a little now at least, for all the good it does.

Yes, as we have discussed.

Some things, I agree. If I had- if I had known that I would see m'sieur Marius here, I do not believe I would have told him all I did, in my final minutes. But they are words that have been spoken, and I cannot take them back. I fear he does not remember them, but perhaps it is a blessing in disguise!

[A small smile splays across her face.] You should remind them. I know that if someone had told me how much I meant to them... Perhaps I would have have been so ready to die.

Does he not? I will not remind him of them of course, but that is...odd perhaps.

[But then, perhaps not so much. Marius did not have knowledge he'd survived at first, he remembers now, thinking of the raid and how he had needed to convince Marius to continue to be a part of it after he had learned of his survival and...]

But then, he was badly injured, perhaps badly enough so as to wish to block his memories of it entirely. We have hardly spoken of the barricades, him and I. I have had the impression that it is not a good subject so he may avoid it in his mind himself. There are some things like that, but if it is a blessing, let us leave it.

[And he finds himself returning that, and nodding]

Perhaps I should. It's been some time after all.

[There is only one thing that Enjolras says that Eponine clues into, all other words meaning nothing to her. Her mouth dry, her lower lip trembles for a moment.] He... was only badly injured?

He did not fall, do you mean to say?

[She inhales sharply, not sure what it means, or how, if it's true, to take this information. Perhaps it isn't. Perhaps he died. But if he survived... No. He would not have his Cosette. She had left by then. Eponine had made sure of it.

Her nose stings.]

If what he said that he learned here is true at least he managed, after quite some time to make a recovery. That is most of what I've heard of it at least.

He was overjoyed at the idea of it at the time, but since, we have not really spoken of that. It seems to be a subject best left behind in that world for him and I cannot say that I blame him so much for it.

He would have been the only one of us to walk from there, and well, there is no easy way to do such things, I can imagine.

He survived. [Again, it was all she heard. The stinging in her nose is sharper now, turning the end of it red, and she shuts her eyes, swallowing with some difficulty.]

Marius Pontmercy survived the barricade.

[And then there's that sharp laugh that she has, trailing off into something tragically bubbly at the end.] Marius survived! Of course he should! Why should he have fallen with the rest of us? Why, out of everyone, would he not be the one to walk! Oh he is a fine man, that Marius. Worthy of of the life I gave for him! [On her side of the screen, something can be heard crashing to the ground and breaking.]

[She laughs again, refusing to open her eyes. To do so would be to ease open the flood gates.] Why would he not survive. So that he can have the happy ending he wanted. So that I can pretend I had mine, but it has continued and it's lost! All of it! Lost and gone and wasted and useless! Such a funny thing, is it not, m'sieur? Some should have everything while I am reduced to nothing. Not even my dreams are untouched from the darkness that I live in!

I can have him here, but if he leaves then I will not have him any longer. It will be one of those dreams, stained dark with ashes! Oh, no! He is not mine, he has never been mine, I shall never have him! I should have let that bullet take him!

[Her small shoulders hunch forward and she drops her head, wrapping her frail arms around herself as she shakes from the force of her sobs.]

[A few things register to Enjolras as this starts. Eponine is upset. Eponine is a Girl. A Girl Is Upset And Crying. He made a girl cry. And it's vaguely terrifying. Crying woman. What do? He has honestly no clue, aside the fact that probably she should not be alone right now. She is also close enough that he can make his way over to her suite at once, despite the hour, where he's hoping that she will answer the door if he knocks.

Not that he has any idea WHAT he is doing but he has to try to repair this somehow, at any rate.

So he's disconnecting the call and making his way over to her suite and knocking.]

Eponine? Eponine, may I come in?

Edited 2013-10-08 05:50 (UTC)

[When the knock sounds, Eponine hasn't even realized that the call has been disconnected, far too consumed with emotions she couldn't dare to name or feel otherwise. Her bottle is broken at her feet.

At the knock she looks up, then to the screen and slowly rises, stepping over the glass to answer the door.

Her eyes are red when she opens the door in nothing more than a nightgown. It was more than she had worn in Paris but nothing polite to answer the door in. Oops. She gazes at Enjolras, and suddenly she straightens up, wiping her eyes on the back of her hand. She had not been crying, of course not.] Enjolras?

Eponine.

[If it helps at all, Enjolras is wearing only a shirt with his breeches and has not bothered to grab waiscoat or coat before making his way over here. He does avert his eyes up to her face to focus his gaze there.]

It seems as though you may have needed...someone just this moment and I am not so far I could not come to you. What may I do?

[If she weren't, y'know, trying not to keep crying, she would totally be pleased with this images. What? Enjolras was cute.]

Oh. I am... [She frowns, considering this before stepping aside so he can come in.] I do not need anyone, m'sieur. I have never needed anyone. So much is better when I am on my own.

[Might I add that this shirt is slightly unbuttoned a bit more than is proper because Enjolras was not exactly thinking about such things at the time? Not that he would notice anyone being pleased with the image he's presenting right now, or if he did, he would think it was extremely odd. At any rate...]

Some things perhaps. But a friend in distress is someone I must check on myself. And as I appear to be the cause, it would be wrong to allow you to simply be alone just now.

[Good thing she in no way is sexually attracted to him. On her side, her night gown is a simple white shift, and is far more revealing than it should be for a girl of her time- that is to say, it's to her knees, and the sleeves are short.]

It is not your fault. It is the fault of my mind. But if you must stay, then fetch us whiskey. It is in the cabinet. [She waves a tired hand over towards the cabinet, before she moves to sit down on her couch, very much a ghost in her own suite.]

[Somehow that manages, still, to be FAR less disturbing than Courfeyrac's breasts. Marius may say otherwise but Enjolras is at least not AS bad as all of that. Okay, so he's not looking at her knees or anywhere but...]

Whiskey can be done.

[And he's moving to do that almost at once, knowing that, yes, as much as he personally dislikes it, the fact is that people do relax with drinking, and he will not stop anyone else from doing that so...Yes. He avoids pouring one for himself of course but is handing Eponine a glass shortly after, and then, well. He may as well come out and say it since it seems that Marius's Cosette is part of the problem here.]

...She was here for a time, Marius says. But has disappeared and not returned. I do not know if that is any hope but it is something?

Thank you.

[Eponine brings her knees up to her chest on the sofa. She sniffles, trying to make herself small. When Enjolras hands her the whiskey, she eagerly accepts, taking a long drink, enjoying the burn it gives her down her throat.

After she finishes the glass she hands it to him, desperate for more.]

It does not matter. When he returns home he shall have her. He has never noticed me, always in favor of her. I was nothing but a way to meet her, to help him and I did it like the fool I am all for a glance and a kind word! I should have let him die first. But to live without him- and now! Now I shall!

You may not as such.

[Enjolras is hesitant about touching people who are not les amis, or being touched but he finds himself reaching to steady her with a hand on her shoulder, as he might Jehan or Courfeyrac. While he does think there is nothing, truly, to keep Marius from Cosette if he returns to the same world, or if she comes here, well, for the moment, Cosette is not a factor, certainly. If that should make Eponine feel any comfort, well...]

I cannot think it likely that he will return anywhere. Marius has been here for a long time. So long, I think it is unlike he'll be returning anywhere. I do not know if it is any comfort or not but even so...

[The hand on her shoulder is rare and strange, stirring her out of her hunched over position, drawing her eyes up towards him, wide with wonder. No one touched her when she cried. If she cried, they did not speak of it. She didn't let anyone see her cry. But here she was, and the hand on her shoulder is enough to cause her to turn her entire body, curling up against Enjolras, her arms wrapped around him, crying freely again.]

But if he does! All things are possible, Enjolras. If he leaves, when he leaves, he shall be with her. The girl who took everything from me! She will leave me nothing! No happiness in the world!

[This is the part where Enjolras freezes a bit, automatically, and it is not because of Eponine herself, though the fact that a woman is hugging him is sort of bizarre, it's the idea of being touched in such a way by someone not of les amis that strikes him as...he is not sure, and for a moment, there is something in him that is overloaded.

If it provides her comfort now though, he reminds himself, he can surely grant that and awkwardly, with his arms quite tense, he attempts to arrange them like he has seen before when others comfort someone. What would Combeferre do, he wonders, then wonders why he did not think to simply GET Combeferre to fix this problem in the first place. But he is hardly going to leave her alone to contact him now.]

I am sorry then, Eponine, but surely there are happinesses to be found outside of Marius, and happiness to be had with him here while you both remain.

[She is not used to comfort, either. But now she craves it so desperately. It's as though her last moments in Marius' arms have awakened that desire, and here Enjolras will give it to her. She sobs into his chest, holding on for dear life. If he is awkward, she does not recognize it. She's too wrapped up in her emotions.]

I do not care! Not now! I am happy to be his friend, more than anything. I have never had friends, and have always considered him one. But- I had no happiness. It is what brought me to your barricade that night. I knew I would not survive. And I did not wish to! I longed to die there in his arms and I did! I knew he would perish with me. But he did not. That is why I gave him the letter at last. If he has her to go back to, he will never care for me here. She will always be there. A ghost haunting me since we were children!

[And Enjolras...stands there trying to think of what to do or something he might say, though nothing comes to mind. He's thankful that she doesn't SEEM to notice he is having issues with this at the moment, though. That would be terrible, and he does care about her and does not want her to think otherwise for a moment. So...he awkwardly begins to pat her head, in what is probably not entirely a soothing way.]

Perhaps not all is settled as that, Eponine. And here we find ourselves in the midst of possibility. I had never thought, there, to have what I do here, and we have all of us changed. Including Marius, I think.

Of course you did not! We did not know this place existed. But I? I dreamed of such things. Having him, being with him, letting him look at me and smile. It is all I wished for! Do you know why I came to your barricade? I care not for France or patria or liberty! I went to die, m'sieur. I knew there was nothing left for me. Death was the choice I made. And now I am here, and all is lost!

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he wanted to take this to action. this okay?

Of course!

:D or not so :D cause poor Epiny but..

I understand <3

Re: I understand <3

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