tushanshu | oo2 ; [ video ]

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oo2 ; [ video ]

[It has almost been a month, and already Eponine looks far better than she had when she made her first appearance on the Network. Gone are her bloody rags, replaced by clothing that, while perhaps not her preferred style, actually fit her small frame and kept her covered. There's a light in her eyes that hasn't been there before.]

I had been wandering about the other night, keeping to myself- an old habit that I cannot drop, I do love to venture out at night, to see what there is, to experience a world that no one else sees because they are asleep- and I had a thought.

I have been here near a month. A month since I could feel my life leave my body. Such a long time! But already- already here I have been happier than I can recall in nine years! Only one other time can eclipse this!

Here, I have a home, clothing, a bed. There is food and I am warm. I have my beautiful brother- and mark me, I shall not leave him again, I have promised him and I will not go back on this promise. Not again- and I have friends.

I do not suppose I have ever had a true friend until I came here.

Death is by far one of the more grand things that has ever happened to me! To think-- no. I shall tell you, if you are listening, that I am happy here. Happier than I have ever deserved!

[She pauses for a moment, looking off to the side of the screen, and frowning.] Perhaps Enjolras is right. It is stupid to do these things so late at night. Forgive me. I have made a fool of myself yet again.

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No. Marius survived it, as I said, but he was in no state, at the time, to have noticed anything. The Inspector perhaps, but I do prefer not to ask him such things. I am not sure he would appreciate a reminder of what went on there.

But yes, let's think of them as that and leave it there, I think, More fitting somehow.

[Does he have wine? He's honestly not sure right now, or if that went the last time he spent with his friends, so better not to offer that exactly, but...]

We should arrange something like that perhaps, for all of us here who have had someone...one of us go before. Some sort of thanks to them perhaps if that can be arranged.

I meant my brother, but all is well.

No. [She said darkly.] I prefer not to concern myself with Javert. He is a cruel man. I have run into him before.

[She considers this for a moment.] Perhaps. I can imagine it would be an interesting affair, at the very least.

We should also, I find it only fair, to have something for those of us from the barricade. To drink to those who aren't here with us now.

I simply meant in terms of those who may have spoken to the aftermath, actually, that I know of for certain, but no, I cannot imagine that it would have been a place for Gavroche, much as he has always managed to find ways to live against what life has thrown at him.

As for Javert...

[Enjolras is not sure that he would say cruel exactly, but there is, undoubtedly, a great deal of empathy that the man lacks, and a good deal of thinking that does not apply to people as such. Perhaps it seems like a good fit for a policeman, who'll ensure that justice will be done, but in reality, it has obviously not played to Eponine's advantage, so...]

He lacks an understanding of humanity I think. One that I had to learn as well, but it seems, really, that he never did. I do not suggest that he be pitied for that, of course, there are always ways to learn if one is willing, but it makes it a bit easier, perhaps, to understand what he is like. We've worked together here, you know, not by choice, but a random draw, at a time we were divided into groups, and faced some dark things together, were tor...

[He stops there, not wanting to bring that torture up to Eponine of all people. Her life was harder still than what Malicant tossed out at them, he thinks, and well, he deserved what he was given, clearly.]

Well, we experienced some extremely difficult things, I'll say. But unlike with the others in our party, we did not draw closer together after. I think he lacks ability for that, or perhaps context. Sad, certainly, but there is more that he might have looked closer at in life...the man is complicated, let us say, and leave it there. I doubt we would get far at any rate.

I think so yes, to both of those ideas. There are so many who I would like to remember, and to honor. You have a good idea there, Eponine. I think that we can easily see it done.

Were tor...? [She looks at him, raising an eyebrow, hoping to needle him into telling her more.] You are so vague some times and yet other times tell me details! It is frustrating, m'sieur, as I will have you know.

He claims he knows what it is to suffer, but he knows not. If he did, perhaps he would not have arrested me and carted me off to Les Madelonettes. [For what crimes, she did not say.] I was only there for a short time, but what a terrible time it was! He is a cruel man, I shall remind you.

Thank you. I'm certain it shall be most appreciated.

We were taken captive by a being of shadows who comes to this island on occasion, and he toyed with each of us in our turn. I do not know what happened to the others exactly, we all experienced those things alone but one would think our shared weakness would bring us closer to an understanding of each other. Sadly, that was not the case, though if he felt close to what I did there, he has certainly suffered somewhat.

I agree that the degrees are different, and he did not, perhaps, need to be so harsh as that.

[Enjolras is not going to ask about the charge. If he does not ask, they do not need to discuss the things girls often go there for.]

I have only been jailed in the extremely short term, myself. The longest was a week, so I have not seen much of life there but I do know the conditions are...One should not send one in need of help to a prison, surely. I think that the Inspector fails to see,when he sees crime, the circumstances for it, or that the law makes those circumstances worse with what criminals are subjected to.

The law itself is often cruel, but as he serves that law and thinks it just, I do believe that he will never understand. There is a danger when it comes to men like him, surely.

That's... It sounds terrible. I wish both of you hadn't had to experience that. No one should have to.

[She'd tell him, of course, but she's sure he's already figured it all out.]

I was there for two months- my father even longer. But he was not released as I was. I believe he escaped with the help of Patron-Minette. When I last saw him I did not have time to ask. My mother even longer still. Prison did not suit her, and as such, has surely found herself in one of the unmarked graves of prisoners.

There are those who commit crime for their own enjoyment, of course. But the fish rots from the head.

Etienne was there as well, and Temeraire and his Captain. Have you had the chance to meet our dragon brother yet? He shares most of L'ABC's goals, and he and Marius differ when it comes to Buonoparte, which is amusing actually. We were rather lucky but I think that the experience left a few things awkward for a time. I'd rather hoped it might bridge something of the gap between us and the inspector. There can never be trust or friendship there after so much, but respect would have been nice, I think, perhaps somewhat lessened suspicion, but alas, that seems that it was not to be.

[He does have rather a good idea of it, yes. And well, unless she'd been directly caught in something, it would be an easier charge to pin onto a young woman if one wanted to keep her jailed for a time.

After all she's told him, Enjolras is not naive enough to think that it does not have to do with the 'work' she had been forced into but still, the charge itself is rather easy, when it comes to it.

As for the rest of her story? He's nodding as she speaks, his eyes sympathetic as she mentions her family, and her mother, though the rest of his face does not noticeably change much. ]

That does sound likely, I am afraid. What is it about men or women being prisoners that means that they do not still have the right to be treated as living beings with decent conditions? I can certainly understand locking away the genuinely dangerous, but the law is too quick to label many as such and toss them away to rot.

[And that disturbs him, from the little hint of disgust and disdain there in his voice.]

Sentences are too harsh by far and it becomes less about teaching lessons than about pure loss of dignity and torture there, and of those who are allowed to leave...they are set up again for much more crime because it is all that they might do in order to survive.

I think you are right, over all. If we wish for crime to change, then we must change the law itself, and the ways that we are governed. It is the only way to ensure cases like your family's do not occur again. Until that comes, there is little we can do at home but push that change. I wish it may be otherwise.

Temer- a dragon? No, Enjolras, I fear I have not! I have never seen a dragon here. I should like to meet him! I've only ever known dragons to be fairy tale creatures!

No, he shall always be suspicious. I cannot bring myself to respect that man. Not when he has forced so many hardships on my family. Without him, perhaps my mother would be alive. [Though she really can't mourn her. Her relationship with her family had become so much less than it had once been. Her father viewed her as a pawn. And while she was loyal to him to an extent, all of that had disappeared the day outside of Rue Plumet. They were all just a way to make sure they all ate. It was hard to love a man who forced her into such positions, who beat her.

It was much clearer now, that she was away from such an environment.]

I could not tell you. I find humanity in even the most dangerous, as I am one of them. Housebreakers, murderers, those were the sorts I spent my time with in Paris. Most often, they were kind to me...

And a life such as mine does not afford dignity, as tragic as it is. I wore rags that barely covered me. My father would see us beg. But I hate such things. Left on my own devices I will never accept charity.

You were a lawyer, like the rest, were you not?

There is also Iskierka, who comes from the same world that he does. Temeraire shares more of the particular worldview I am familiar with but Iskierka...

[There's a note of admiration in Enjolras's voice that is hardly present when he talks about most human beings besides the amis as he mentions her.]

Where Temeraire is calmer and perhaps more deliberate, Iskierka is fire and emotion and exciting. She can set things on fire among other things, and we are due to go flying soon. I think that she might well like to meet you too. She is friendly enough for all that she is quick to action.

[The conversation shifts again to Javert, and Enjolras can understand where she is coming from, and nods. He was only a spy at their barricade, which, while bad enough, cannot compare at all to the relationship that he and Eponine must have.]

A good deal of hardships, yes. I cannot say I blame you for wishing to stay away from the law now that you have the chance to actually avoid it. Smarter than most, I would say.

I was reading the law, slowly, but nowhere near sitting the bar to actually complete the degree. It was...

[Enjolras eyedarts a little here.]

Well,something of an excuse to stay in Paris as long as I could. To see the revolution through. Being a law student provided an excellent chance, but had the choice been left to me, I would have done far differently.

I must meet them! Iskierka sounds... I was recently told I burn. So perhaps I shall feel a strange sort of kinship to this dragon. I would like to meet them both, and the rest of your amis. Though I believe I have, since I've arrived, spoken with all of them.

You will find me a very smart girl. Had I had the money the rest of you had, perhaps you would have found me in your lecture halls. [Extremely unlikely. It was rare that she could read. But to have become a lawyer? No, she was always destined for the street. The street, or working at the Sergent at Waterloo.]

How lucky you are! To have the money needed to remain in Paris as long as you wished! To still study all the while and never work! [That's really all she can focus on at this moment.] You must look at how amazing your life is, for someone like me. Do not have taken it for granted! To be educated and come from money! I would have done far worse things than I did to have that sort of life.

You may then, at that. I think that is why the two of us get along so well. There is something in me still that wishes to burn, at times. She seems to bring it out in me a bit.

[It occurs to Enjolras actually, that, Iskierka and Eponine, together, could be a little horrifying. Three of them may push it over the top. There is something in him, when it comes to that, that he can hardly wait to see.]

I do believe you are that, yes. There was talk of creating a program to study the law here when...some months ago, a few people were going to create a school. I would like to do something with what I've learned at any rate, and well, of course I would not take it for granted, merely...I suppose the law was never where my heart was, if it had a choice. I should have finished it eventually, but I had hoped that the laws that I were studying would one day change before I was through with it.

I do not mean to take it for granted, and the choice was...well, I could hardly have become a doctor, and there was not so much room there at the end of the degree to do my work, but had the option, and the choice been more likely, I would have written for Le National.

There is nothing wrong with the law, and I would have done it well enough, and not resented it.

[Enjolras is firm on that point too. While he may not have found himself a natural fit as a lawyer, it is something that he knew enough of, still knows enough of to be of some use.]

It always seemed as though, well, as a friend pointed out, the lawyer does not do so much to help people so much as himself. Even though I would have taken on defense work, well...I do not think that I would have managed to get far had the world stayed the way it did. Helping one is better than none at all, but I wonder, would I have even managed that at times.

Here, where there are things that we could change, that we should change in the way of foreigners, and the way the empress treats them in their coming here, along with information being kept from us, where we might actually have some impact on those things...the law becomes something much more important. I suppose because there is a chance to fix things here. I would hope that we can.

[As he speaks, Eponine remains silent, reflecting on everything he has to say. He's a very smart man, that much is abundantly clear, capable of looking at the larger pictures in life, something that she herself failed at quite miserably. Eponine had never been able to afford thinking past the end of the day. Tomorrow wasn't promised to her, the way it was to other. As such, she wanted immediate results. Why should she do something that would hurt her currently, but help her in the present? It made no sense to her, and that much was extremely visible in her actions.]

You have given this much thought, Enjolras. I am quite impressed! I have little knowledge of the government here, or the way things are run in terms of us foreigners. If nothing else, I am happy that the Kedan have given us money and places to stay. But I am sure my opinion on this will change, in due time.

What I know, for the most part is very little, admittedly. Mostly I have been present enough to know that some things are hidden from us, and was here for a brief time when the kedan themselves were not so welcoming toward many of us.

And well, that the Empress does not like sharing information when she has a means to avoid it.

[So long here, and Enjolras still cannot with the gender neutral titles, sorry, Ma'am. It's not that he regards you with any less respect than he would an Emperor; he would disrespect a man equally. The titles thing though is just odd to him.]

I do not think that it is as bad here as it could be, and several of them have been kind, but there is the principle at work as well. I AM grateful to have another chance at life, to come to know myself. I had forgotten who that man was, but well, I resent that we were not consulted, and I suspect that some of the law would er on the side of the Kedan should a foreigner be charged by one of them, though the code that we were given does not specify...

[And that is a small shrug, and inelegant.]

Well. there is much more that we must all learn of them before doing much of anything, but I do mean to learn it if that makes sense, and to find infomation even if I must go to different lengths to find it. There are a few of us who feel the same, including Marius, upon occasion.

[Enjolras is a clever man, mentioning Marius here and there. It certainly kept her attention up.]

Of course it would. The law always ers to those in power, to think otherwise is naive. Even I know that, Enjolras. It seems wrong, to come in to their home and demand change to favor us. If anything, work with them to come to some sort of compromise. We owe them much. Particularly us, who had been dead before here.

As you said, I, too, am happy to have another chance at life. To set things straight. To try to do right. Though my habits are hard to break. But all the same, I understand the need for information. The need to learn.

Certainly we must find a balance, yes. I do not mean to propose we charge in and obliterate everything in sight. Merely...some unfairness was happening to other foreigners at first, simply because they were foreigners and I fear that there may be a hold over from that should the law be called upon here.

There must be some sort of an equality, particularly as we have been brought here to fight and die for the Empress and have begun to do much work to better things here regardless. I think that if we are here to fight for another world, then we are owed a similar respect mostly. We are not owed more than that, of course, but should also not accept less.

[Does that go too far? Perhaps it does, but Enjolras has never been one to strive for only half of the equation when something he holds important is at stake, or when he wishes to achieve it.]

It has been good for me here, yes, but even so...So much is missing that if we are to be here for the rest of...well, I suppose that is rather open ended in a place where I have heard that even death may not quite last, well, if we are to be here for the duration, there is much that we must know. But yes, to do things better here. I HAVE been trying.

[Once more, she's ruminating on his words, taking them into consideration.] But you, Enjolras, will always hold more respect than me. I am a woman.

[He may or may not be fully aware of that. She doesn't have large breasts, but they're there. Reproductive organs? Not exactly healthy enough to work the way they're meant to, but she gets some fun out of them.]

I would not fight. Not for something that excludes me. That views me as less than, I suppose in this case, sentient. If that means I must not fight, I shall not fight. I have no desire to pick up arms again. I shall fight with my voice and fists if I must. I have always seen more success with them. [Remember that time she made a whole group of grown men run for the hills? Yeah, she does, too.]

Here that has begun to change. Our sole ruler, the arm of absolute power in this place is a woman. It is different in this case, when it comes to respect. As it should be, though I do not particularly like this one, I do like the larger principles associated with that. Women work as well in the same jobs among the kedan and...they have something of a better way of it, where relations are concerned.

[Sure, women. They're the half of the population, or roughly half, or whatever it is, who wear skirts at home, and can bear babies, and such. Of course Eponine is one, and of course tld not hat would have mattered, socially, at home, though he remains mystified as to why. Does the lack of a penis make one so different from all of that? Only society has made it so. ]

We can say that we would not, and fight with voices and fists, but I do think it may not be so simple as a matter of our survival on this island. If the forces coming at us are dangerous enough, there will be no choice but to cast aside the most important of ideals. I worry.

I worked in the same jobs as my father and his compatriots. [Y'know, thieving.] But there were some, as I have told you, that I did as he could not. In the underworld, there is little room for lines to remain uncrossed.

Perhaps. Hopefully it will not come to that. I have no desire to return to any sort of combat situation. I believe you understand me better than most.

Indeed.

[And Enjolras is nodding at that part, understanding where, well, there would be the necessity in such a life.] I think that here though, there is at least a bit more chance of that being different. I will not say that I know yet, but I would suspect it.

I have met Ma...[And he stops himself from using the name again, knowing well what occurred when people DID mention Malicant's name and what occurred. He cannot do that to the turtle eggs, to Temeraire or any of the others caring for them as to allow him to get close.]

I have met the being who we would likely be carrying out a fight just now. I suspect that the fighting may need to be different from the traditional combat, but yes, I would avoid it too.

I disliked the barricades in 1830 though I knew that they were needed and we had successes there. I liked them less in 1832, though their time had more than come again, and it was no time to be less than resolved. I cannot blame you for wishing to avoid it if you might or there was any other way. I would have chosen the same then and I would choose it now.

I like listening to you speak, Enjolras. I believe you are a much different man from the one I saw in brief on the barricade that night. It makes me sorry that I do not have as much to contribute to our conversation, as I wish I could. But I laid low, and avoided such things until I no longer could. It was not my fight. My fight was to remain alive.

[But even that was a fight she had not wanted.]

I hope it does not come to that.

The barricades brought forth the best and worst of us, I think.

[His thoughts turn to earlier in that day, the man he'd executed for one, how he had stood there after, covered in gore proclaiming love as the path to the future in what had looked like hypocrisy, considers how his speeches dealing with the glory of peace were intercepted with bursts of violence, and well...He can understand that, certainly.]

You managed to catch us at, yes, a terrible moment. I am not surprised that you may think otherwise of me right then. I do not dismiss my potential to be terrible when I must, but it would seem quite...offputting to say the least, at times like that.

You contribute quite enough already, Eponine. You were already in the longer, harder fight, and forced to it at that. There is much that I have learned and can learn from you there.

And I, too, can be terrible. I am terrible. The things I have done and will do. [She can recognize now that there are things wrong in her. Deeply ingrained that are nothing like those around her. She can try and she can pretend, but at the end of the day, she was still very much a nymph of the streets, to borrow a phrase, and in modern times, would very well have some sort of diagnosed condition.]

I know you do not believe me. But I could tell you stories of what I have done. I shall not- I have shared much with you already in terms of my life, but with what you know, I am sure you can imagine.

[She looks at him curiously, pausing for a few moments before she speaks her next words very carefully.] ...Thank you, Apollon. Perhaps we all have much to learn from each other.

[And his nod there is serious. That is something Enjolras cannot doubt, somehow.It makes sense to him that it is the case, and while what she is saying is quite different from his general inability to relate to people, he knows the feeling that something is wrong inside of you quite well enough. ]

I do believe you, and that you could. I believe that you have lived in darkness for far longer than any of us strayed from the light, and that darkness, and what one may have to do in it, causes a harm even if one is not actually hurt.

Long before the July Revolution, I thought it would be easy to repair such things if we simply could change the world. I had not counted on such injury being permanent.

[And he's shaking his head in disgust here. Not at Eponine, never at Eponine, but at his much younger self.]

I was so naive and stupid then. I think some things cannot be healed, though perhaps they can be helped a little if someone knows the way. We are both far from being healed, and your darkness is different, but perhaps here, there is some way.

Thank you for all that you've shown me. I believe we do at that.

To some of us, to me, the injury is permanent. It's a scar across my heart, over my soul. I do not believe it shall ever go away, and if it does? Then what is it that I should do? How to live without such a thing when I have never done so before? It would be too easy to fall back on to old habits. To take further relish in them.

[She sighs, pursing her lips slightly as she regards Enjolras.] I do not believe I can be healed, Enjolras. Deep down, I am not sure I want to be. [If only for Marius, would she want to wash herself clean of everything that came before.]

What is it that I have shown you? I appreciate your gratitude, but I do not believe I am worthy of such praise.

How to live without that is the thing. When there is something which defines us so much as that did you, being without it feels uncertain and what ground that we are left to stand on is shaky at best and there is little of it. What I thought then...I have no idea. I was stupid when we were getting started, and I still had much to learn when I came here.

Perhaps not healed, no. [Too much has happened for that. For Eponine to have escaped that life unscathed, it would have needed to happen a very long time ago, when they were both too young to have done it themselves. The thought of it is painful, perhaps more than it would have been once because she is now a friend.] But perhaps helped enough that it must not harm you any more than it has, or even enough that it does not take your future.

You have shown me greater realities than those I knew. That when I think something has reached its worst, the path can still continue downward, but in spite of that, one can survive, that there is still an ember and it glows at least, if it does not burn. As long as it glows, and one goes on, there is still something in this world, in people themselves. It is something to keep in mind, I think.

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