tushanshu | ❝ 002 ❞ v i d e o

[This post is coming from Hal’s account because someone didn’t log out after sending this message and left a baby to mess around with the keyboard. The background is definitely Hal’s place, but there’s a baby sitting on the table in front of the console. Said baby is wearing a Green Lantern onesie and has a tiny power ring on his finger and is chewing on a Flash ring.

There’s also no one else in sight. Someone is a terrible babysitter. Eventually he wanders into the frame. Hal doesn’t look that different except for the fact that his temples are grey. He’s actually a few years younger than he should be right now. This is him in his Parallax years. But he wanders in, holding a bag of groceries and walks to the baby and pulls out a small bar of chocolate and unwraps it before giving it to him before he walks off again, presumably to put things away.

The baby makes a baby noise and suddenly he’s wearing a construct of Hal’s flightjacket. Moments pass and it really doesn’t look like Hal’s coming back any time soon.]

[ooc: Said baby is Bart Allen. BARRY, COME AND TAKE YOUR GRANDSON. OR ANYONE REALLY. Also please indicate if you wish to 'converse' with Bart as well.]

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[Kyle happened to have a minor heart attack the moment Bart swallowed the ring, but he knows babies freak out if you shout, so he keeps his tone measured.]

Hal, you left him on the desk and he ate the ring!

[Bart is cold, you guys. And he's already figured out that he's only got one way to really voice displeasure. He's screaming his little lungs out.]

[...Jesus Christ.

Barry, as a thirty-some year old man, was completely unequipped to deal with small children, especially crying screaming ones. Barry, as a ten year old, is even less equipped to deal with a crying screaming small child. His face is a mask of pure panic and his ear is slowly starting to go deaf.]

Can we focus on the baby and not Hal for a minute?

[AKA how the hell does he make it stop crying.]

[Luckily for everyone, Kyle is very well-equipped. The instant Bart starts crying, he stares hard, and when Barry comes back Kyle jabs at the screen.]

Check his diaper! It's either that or he just wants to be rocked.

[The minute Kyle gives his order, Barry's off-screen again, having taken Bart to the nearest flat surface he could reach (sorry Hal, your couch might never be the same) and slowly and carefully peeled back Bart's diaper.

.............

Still off-screen:]

How do I change his diaper?

[Adult Barry probably would have figured it out and done it without fuss. Child Barry, however, is suffering still from crying baby panic as well as the strong urge of most ten year olds to not touch anything that might come out of a baby's butt ever.

Kyle help.]

[Luckily, Kyle talks him through it, enunciating carefully. He waits for Barry to respond that every step's complete before going on to the next one, and when he finally gets to disposing the old one, he exhales.]

Has he stopped crying?

[Have fun with that. Hal is going to step away from this even if he could do this without touching poop at all. But he'll give them a sterile bubble to work on.]

[Thank goodness for Kyle. His instructions are succinct, clear, and it's not too long afterwards that Barry's disposing of one soiled diaper and Bart's no longer shrieking loudly.]

For the moment. He might start up again any second.

[Or so Barry fears. He's not exactly the greatest around kids.]

[Or he might just be content to be looking back and forth between the two of them. Observing the Justice League in their not-so-natural habitats.

... actually, he just wants Hal to give him more chocolate.]

I'm coming over.

[Bossy, with the tone of a kid who's pretty much determined Hal needs to sit this one out, and possibly Barry too.]

[Barry is a-okay with sitting this one out and will be forever grateful to Kyle if he manages to magically take care of all of this.

He will just be trying vainly not to make Bart cry again while he waits for Kyle to show up.]

[A few minutes later he's tapping on the window, hovering.]

[It won't be long before Barry's at the window, carefully opening it to let Kyle in.]

Thanks for coming over.

[There's genuine relief and gratitude in his voice. As much as he hates to admit it, he's really not the best person for all of this (though he likes to think he's better than Hal at least).]

❝ 002 ❞ v i d e o

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not here;

YOU SUCK HAL

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