tushanshu | seven : a scary conversation [AUDIO]

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seven : a scary conversation [AUDIO]

[Hayley sighs a little, then sounds mostly disappointed. Those paying close attention can probably tell it masks a level of anger.]

Seriously? Is no one talking about the whole people getting murdered thing?

[ooc: Action for Superman is in first thread]

[100% Trek encrypted to: Clark]
[There's the longest pause before she speaks, extremely quiet and definitely scared.]

So I, uh.. was dead.

[100% Trek encrypted to: Lois]
[Her voice is mostly level when she messages Lois, but clearly hiding something less neutral.]

I know you and Clark tell each other everything, so whatever. I need some time off from the radio.

[100% Trek encrypted to: Bruce Banner]
You need to see something. Can you come over later?

[100% Trek encrypted to: Dick Grayson (comics)]
You know, you never actually told me who your family members are.

[100% Trek encrypted to: Jason Todd]
Tell me you're not too busy for a drink.

[100% Trek encrypted to: Maxwell Lord]
[There's a pause, then Hayley sounds more pleasant.]
Hey.

[100% Trek encrypted to: Chekov]
Will you help teach me how to encrypt things? I want to learn.

[100% Trek encrypted to: Loki]
What makes a soul any different from just like, memories and neurons and whatever?

[100% Trek encrypted to: Jor-El] - (added a short while later)
You have all the same powers Superman does, right?

[100% Trek encrypted to: Bruce Wayne] - (added a short while later)
I'm sorry, about work. I just need a few more days off and then I'll come back. Please?

[Assume she hasn't shown up the last week or so.]

[100% Trek encrypted to: Sabriel] - (added a short while later)
I want to learn magic.

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What?

[It's like his heart stops for a moment and he has to frantically search for stability again when it comes back, rather than letting it just lurch in his chest. Bruce isn't truly responsible for Hayley-- but no one else is, either, and no one knows her secrets as well as he does, he's sure.

That makes him more responsible than anyone else here. That makes him protective, an emotion that is both fierce and riotous in him, but doubly so when for a girl her age.]

Was it the same person? [he asks in a low, dark voice, abruptly conscious not to spill that Tony had died if she doesn't already know.] Who killed everyone. Do you know who it was?

[The cloning is interesting, undeniably. But it's taking a second seat to the pressing restlessness thrumming through his veins.]

I don't.. know who "everyone" is. [Bruce's swift and profound interest in the matter makes her more quiet and passive, compensating. Hayley sounds weary and, as one of the few who knows her well, Bruce can probably hear just how destroyed she is right now. Her tone is still meant to be dismissive and apathetic, but given their history, she feels less need to hide the fear than with most.]

I only know one other person who died and I don't know who killed him. Or me.

[Hayley knows Bruce and Tony are friends. That makes her more hesitant to reveal Tony as the other party if he hasn't told Bruce himself, a bit like being the one to let slip details of an affair. An awkwardness she would much rather avoid.]

You and-- someone else that I know. [He falters briefly, then recovers; Bruce is struggling to keep a lid on his reaction, the burning desire to storm out and not stop until he finds answers. It's uncomfortably close to how the Hulk feels, that mindless determination to keep smashing and smashing. It's disconcerting, and he doesn't like it, but for once he's agreeing with it.

No one's allowed to hurt someone under his protection. Not anymore. And here he's failed twice.]

So that's two, maybe three if we're not talking about the same person. There might be more. I know this isn't-- [He regains some of his normal acumen, enough to take a breath.] You don't have to talk about it, but I want to find who did this. I need to find who did this. So they can't do it again.

[There's unbending steel in his voice.]

Whatever you remember that you want to tell, I want to hear.

[There's a short silence as Hayley considers his reply, the slight hitch and his own pause. Fairly confident in her response, she corrects him.] Two, that we know of.

[Then she lets out a soft sigh. It's a little bit like being in the Dream all over again, Bruce catching snippets of nightmares better left compartmentalized and stored away. She knows he's trying to help, but thinking about her own death is just too difficult right now, too fresh.]

I can't.. I don't remember, Bruce. [Her voice breaks at the end and she has to fight to surprise the desperation again. When she resumes, the fear in her tone is stronger in spite of her efforts.] I can't remember anything.

[He silently accepts the correction without verifying it, too good at playing that game. But he agrees with her. He doesn't know how Hayley and Tony would know each other, but if there's a third person that's been killed, that's even worse. He'd rather not assume it without direct evidence, though he isn't discarding it.

The way her voice breaks, even if she recovers afterward, immediately makes him rein it in. He can't take it out on her. His ire had never been directed at her, and letting it out even tangentially, in a conversation with her, is unbearable to him. Bruce won't inflict that on her.]

No, it's okay, [he says immediately, voice softening and gentling. His settles himself, breathing, pushing away the anger. It's easier now that he's let it out a little. It's almost addictive with how much easier it is.]

I just don't want this to happen again. I'm sorry that you-- [Despite his effort to regain calm, he has to fight against frustration.] That should never have happened to you.

Stop. [She nearly cuts him off with the word.] Do not apologize.

[Hayley's tone is immediately more angry. If Bruce is angry on her behalf, it gives her the excuse to idle in her misery. It's the kindness she can't stand; the feigned sympathies and boarish displays of ignorant pity. She can't help the blurring of lines, recalling the same way people expressed their regrets after her father's murder.

It's not Bruce's fault, but she's an angry teenager with no outlet and lacking the wisdom and experience to reign her hurt in. While the best thing for her is to be pushed into talking about it or accepting others' concern, it's the last thing she wants.]

It's not your fault, I'm fine, and I'm sure you have better things to do right now than to coddle me.

[He's refused sympathy so many times himself that he doesn't take it personally here. But he also can't stop himself from the response he wants to give, the kneejerk desire to make her situation different from what his had always been.]

No. [It's quiet, firm-- soft but implacable.] I don't have anything better to do than make sure you're alright, Hayley.

[There's a short silence. Then Hayley clicks over to video. She's pale, with dark circles under her eyes, looking exhausted and still nervous and afraid. There's a weariness there beyond the physical, a fatigue of just being alive and social.]

I'm not alright. [She replies quietly, clearly exasperated with admitting even that much.] That's pretty obvious. But there's nothing to do about it. Don't you get that? I don't remember anything and no one else knew, except you and Tony, and nothing's happening. Of course I'll do something, but..

[She grimaces, too tired to hide the expression entirely.] I was powerless.

[Hayley knows that's all she needs to say for him to understand. Powerless to prevent it from happening again, powerless to make it stop. It's one thing to be powerless as a child, but another to be powerless again as an adolescent.]

[Bruce switches when she does, though he's composed, as unflappable as ever. There's an edge of honest tension to him, however, that's new-- he's not strained but he is poised, hints of ruthless anger lapping at the edges of his demeanor.

He does know what it means to be made powerless, and how devastating that is to feel again. It only deepens his anger, and the resulting determination to never allow this to happen again. Whatever that took.

There's not much he can do for her right now-- she's correct on that much. Hayley doesn't have a Hulk, can't tell herself she's invulnerable. Bruce wouldn't wish that on her anyway, but he can't deny, after how far he's come in the past few months, that the Hulk is his own desire to never be made powerless again. And it'd worked. He can at least use it for what it's meant for.]

My couch is open. If you think it'd be easier to sleep with... someone there. [Someone who's invulnerable, and protective.] I wouldn't let anything happen to you-- neither of us would.

[He believes, has to believe, that for all of his mindless destruction, the Hulk is capable of protecting those who deserve it. Bruce has had that proven to him.]

[She can sense the difference in him, but is too distracted and tired to be able to put her finger on what exactly has changed. Hayley can feel the anger after a little while, though, knows both that it's there and not directed at her. It's a skill she's honed for many years and one she doesn't readily admit to.

At the offer, she gives a weak and forced smile momentarily, then lets her lips collapse back into exhaustion again.]

How can I trust it? [That she trusts Bruce is implied, but he's taught her that the Hulk is a mindless danger and something to be avoided and hated. There's a small pause as she debates telling him before she adds:] I'm going to stay with Jor-El.

[She's torn about the decision. As much as she likes Jor-El and is confident he has the powers Superman possesses, there's still some part of the back of her mind that insists there's something off about it. Nowhere is entirely safe.]

[It's a good question-- one Bruce has been asking himself daily for the past ten years. The answer has, very gradually, been changing lately. He takes mental note that she'll be staying with Jor-El, though he doesn't know who that is, and merely nods in acknowledgement. It's good to know where she'll be, simply out of a kneejerk protective sense.]

Trust is the wrong word. [Bruce is far from using that yet.] But he's... protected people before. People I would have wanted him to protect, specifically. [Betty, more than once. Then Tony.] If it's a stranger then I can't-- I wouldn't expect anything. But someone I know...

[Someone he wants to protect, consciously. That seems to be different.]

[She blinks.]

And you really want to protect me that much? [It's a mixture of shock and suspicion. Hayley wants to be protected and wants people to want to protect her, sure, but it's not something she expects. It's also not something she plans to admit to wanting, beyond the purely practical, reasonable part of the idea.]

[Answering this requires drawing a tie between them, allowing himself to be anchored to the world. Bruce is as reluctant to do that as ever. But as before, he obeys his policy of honesty with Hayley.]

Why wouldn't I? [he asks reflexively, voice going a little hoarse.] Who else is going to do it? You deserve to not... feel threatened sometimes.

[All those chances he'd never had, that are what feels like too late for him, Bruce wants to try to give to her.]

Edited 2013-10-22 12:20 (UTC)

I have other.. people, Bruce. [Because 'friends' isn't the right word.] They can protect me too. You don't have to.

[Of course she wants the protection, but she can sense that anchor too and it makes her nearly as nervous as it makes Bruce, if not more so. Relying on anyone too much is a vulnerability and a risk she can't take.]

That's supposed to be it now? [he asks quietly.] That's what... makes someone not a monster? Protection just when it's necessary.

You know a person can do better than that.

[It's too late, he knows. Too late to stay independent and without any ties whatsoever. That hadn't worked, and it would be the height of stupidity for him to keep repeating an experiment that had yielded negative results, hoping that this time would do it.

Ten years of the same experiment-- isolation-- hadn't done it. Bruce wasn't willing to let go of it that easily, but he has been at last forced to try other things. Hayley is, in his opinion, more deserving of that anchor than any other candidate he knows. She's someone that's owed protection, as an apology from the world for all the rest it's done to her. Bruce wants to play his part in that.]

[Hayley shakes her head. Even Bruce's caring and desire to protect her doesn't entirely make him not a monster. There's still some part of him that always will be, that will never stop being a monster. But she can't tell him that, not now. She knows he's trying and, until they come up with something better, what he's doing now will have to be enough.]

And you should do better than that. But not for me.

[It's stated with the same tone as before, nothing threatening or afraid. Hayley's only scared of letting him too close and, while it might be obvious when so many of his own behaviors reflect hers, she's unwilling to admit as much even entirely to herself. He knows too much about her. It would be stupid to trust him with anything more.]

[He's never, for one day in his life, thought it was possible for him to stop being a monster completely. There's always that part of him passed down from his father, lurking, waiting for its chance if he relaxes his vigilance too far. No logic or comforting words has ever managed to persuade Bruce otherwise.

Yet that's a weak excuse, a pathetic one, for acting like a monster. There is a palpable, distinct difference between being and acting, and Bruce knows it.]

You're the exception? [Bruce smiles wryly, shakes his head a little.] Sorry. I'm not really good at special treatment.

[It's light, playing off the real message here. That Bruce doesn't see any reason she should be treated differently.]

[Hayley frowns, unwilling to let him get off that easily.]

You know what I mean, Bruce. I don't want to be your charity case and you can't say you would be inviting everyone else to stay and having the thing protect them and whatever. You're making me special and you really shouldn't.

[It is special treatment for him to look after her like he is and that's the problem. If he was a generally nice, social, and giving guy, she wouldn't mind so much. But he's not. He isolates and enjoys his privacy. For him to break both those preferences for her is an exception, not the rule.]

[It's not more than a small exception. Everything Bruce has given up in the past has been to protect others-- or so he's told himself, denying the underlying selfish motives. But from his perspective, it's the goal of protection that has driven all of his actions. Protecting others from him, but protecting them from anyone else, too, if necessary.]

How would you be my charity case? [Bruce sighs softly, giving up on his short lived attempt to divert her.] If you don't want it, then don't... don't take it. I've told you that before.

But if I thought anyone else would be protected, yeah. I'd invite them, too. And I have. [The Hulk doesn't protect just anyone, but those few he has, Bruce has to acknowledge.]

[As much as she wants to continue to deny it, Hayley's not keen on being terrible just for the sake of driving Bruce away, not when the practical part of her knows that his offer is a good one and will probably come in use.]

I don't trust it. [She sighs a little with the honesty.] I haven't even seen it, and I don't really want to. I think- [She hesitates, then continues again.] I know you would protect me if I asked you to. But do you know- know that it would do the same?

[He's not taking it personally, in any case. He's pushed people away enough to know that it has nothing to do with them and everything to do with him-- or in this case, with her.

The honest answer is that no, he doesn't know. But Bruce hasn't made this conclusion lightly. Far from it. So he lays out his reasoning as if it were an experiment whose method he's recounting, letting her draw her own conclusion or argue against his hypothesis.]

The evidence isn't consistent. The... first time it happened, the very first time, he hurt someone I care about. But he didn't kill her. And I think-- I've wondered, recently, if he wasn't as confused at what was happening as I was.

[Moving on quickly,] The next time he saw her, the next two times, he saved her life. She said he was-- almost kind to her. In my future, he saves Tony's life. He's made a friend here. [Bruce isn't sanguine about the Hulk's relationship with the Archive, but he accepts it.]

He's as terrible as I told you he is. He's killed, destroyed countless lives. But it's... not always. So no, I don't know for sure. You'd have to ask him. We don't consult.

[Hayley thinks on it for a moment.] The woman in the lab and your best friend. Those are pretty substantial relationships.

[Meaning that their relationship is not. They're not friends and Hayley certainly isn't any kind of peace for Bruce. Besides, Jeff could be nice too. So could her father. That didn't make them any less of monsters.]

Every monster has a public face. You know that. But sure, maybe I'll ask him myself sometime.

[She's right about this, too, but Bruce doesn't know how to say what he's thinking without delving deeper into a subject he has no intention of going. He thinks the Hulk won't attack her because she's young, female, and someone Bruce explicitly thinks of as someone that needs protection from abusers.

The way he'd always thought of his mother, of Betty, needing protection. It's not that he liked Hayley all that much-- not that he trusted her, not that he was that intent on helping her. But he couldn't let himself be the kind of person that would ignore her, and there's a faint, strangely certain suspicion that the Hulk would feel the same way.]

A public face? [Bruce has to laugh a little, incredulously.] He's... everything I'm not. There's no facade. Nothing faked. It's all-- raw.

You'll know exactly what he thinks about you when he looks at you.

Whatever.

[She doesn't really believe that the Hulk can't have its own public face, but she isn't about to enter a fight right now. Not about that. Bruce is completely biased and she'll never know until she faces the monster herself. But that won't be for some time.]

I'll talk to you later, okay?

[Bruce honestly hopes she never has to find out for herself what the Hulk is like. Bruce is incredibly biased, but not in the way she thinks.]

Keep safe, [he says seriously, letting her go the moment she wants to go.]

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seven : a scary conversation [AUDIO]

audio 100% Trek encryption

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