003 || [video]
Hello, again. For those who may not know me, my name is Sharon Carter. Back home, I was a government agent. I know everyone's busy with the cold and the disappearances, so I'll try not to take as little of your time as possible.
In short, if you know anything about the killings in recent months, I'd like to speak with you.
In short, if you know anything about the killings in recent months, I'd like to speak with you.
[video]
Do you have these rules written down where anyone interested in not being your victim can read them?
[video]
'Course not, it ain't my job to educate you slack-jawed knuckle-draggers, now is it? Ain't nothin' to worry about so long as you show proper respect.
[video]
[ She ignores the rest. He's already educating her about his philosophy as it is. She wonders if it's real; he doesn't seem to be lying, but it still seems incredible. ]
[video]
[It's a rainbow of a caste system more or less.]
[video]
[ Good lord. He seems to be serious. ]
And where do trolls live?
[ Please say under bridges. Please say under bridges. ]
[video]
[He gives her a flat look.]
On our planet?
[Sorry to disappoint.]
[video]
So you have an entire planet of trolls who think it's all right to murder other people for inconsequential reasons?
[video]
Actually [He sounds so smarmy] we hawe taken ower most a the surroundin' galaxy, subjugatin' the other species and their planets. We're quite the opposin' force. So, not just a entire planet.
[He's just going to leave out the fact that he should have said 'we were quite the opposin' force' considering that there's only, oh, 10 trolls left alive out of their whole species. Technicalities.]
Are you surprised, though? Where the fuck else would we be if not our own planet?
[video]
That depends. Did you live under bridges on your own planet?
[ Deep breath. That isn't the way to gather intel, Sharon. And just because you don't think he's worth gathering intel from doesn't mean he has nothing to say. ]
Do trolls ever join up with others to murder people?
[video]
[He's honestly baffled by the question. He really doesn't understand why she'd ask such a thing, so he can't even be entirely insulted.] No. We liwe in self made hiwes--at least until we are recruited into space once we're a proper militant age. Then we're shipbound.
[The second question, however, is a bit better.]
Depends, really. We ain't apt to trust just anyone. But if they prowe themselwes useful, an' easily disposable if the need arises, then we could. I mean, my ol' kismesis an' I joined forces and killed probably... [He trails off thinking, looking like he may be mentally counting] fuck, probably thousands by the end a our arrangement.
[He sounds very proud.]
[video]
She clears her throat and tries to think this through. He isn't a suspect, but he's willing to team up with the killer under the right circumstances. If he's telling the truth, of course. ]
But you wouldn't keep your killings a secret like this person is doing. Say, if you two did find one another and decide to paint the town red.
[video]
Usually you try to hide somethin' if you're ashamed a it, or you'll garner some sort a consequence. Me bein' who I am, I'we not reason to cower whatewer bloody trails I'll be leawin'. As far as I'm concerned, ain't no one on this damn shellbeast that could take me down anyway.
[He quirks a brow.]
But you don't need to worry about her an' me, we'we parted ways a long time ago. If anythin', this would be a solo act. Hypothetically speakin', a course.
[video]
Don't let me hear about you killing or even trying to kill anyone, or we'll see if anyone here could take you down.
Now if you'll excuse me, you aren't a suspect in this matter, and I need to focus on people who are.
[video]
[Eridan looks utterly amused.] But sure, go do your business. I ain't got much else to discuss with you anyway.
[He offers her a little farewell wiggle of his fingers before cutting off the feed.]