tushanshu | Video; In which cold weather is clearly the best!

[Everyone gets to see two familiar faces this time, with a couple of twists. Dick (the elder) is sitting down in the chair, wearing a bright red coat with white trim, a hat of the same color, and of course, a beard to match the whole thing. It’s pulled down, though, so you can see his face. And his wonderful assistant, Zatanna, is standing behind him, dressed up like the most beautiful elf there is. They’re both looking pretty happy about this.]

It’s getting cold out! And what does cold mean? Holiday fun, of course. So I, and my amazing elf assistant here, have decided that Santa Claus needs to come to the turtle. [See what he did there? See it? Okay, good.]

And so it is with pleasure that we let everyone know-- [He gets cut off as Zatanna leans forward, and he looks up at her.]

[The fifteen-year-old elf bends down until she's level with his ear, covering her mouth so she could whisper something secretively to him.]

Really?

[She nods, and offers a playful wink.] Trust me. I know a guy who knows the guy personally.

[Dick looks back at the screen, and his voice drops into a perfect, heavy Russian accent.] Is this better?

[She practically has to bite her tongue to keep from bursting out laughing. Impressive. She should've known.] It'll do.

[Dick grins.] I’d like to invite everyone to come over to the Wood sector, where we have a little holiday party going on.

[He stops, laughing and shaking his head. He has to drop the Russian accent.] Okay, I can’t keep that one up, but I tried! Anyway, we’ve got a small thing going on in a café in the Wood sector, with some cakes and gingerbread-ish things, and some hot drinks. And what would Santa be without his...

[He holds up a huge, red velvet-like bag.] Bag, yes! And it is filled with little odds and ends, so there are presents for all!

[Dick sets the bag down, and pulls the beard back up with a grin.] And to all, a good... day? Yeah, that still works. To all, a good day! Remember, café in the Wood sector, we’ll be here awhile!

[ooc: Action is absolutely welcome.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[.............]

... I'll be at the clinic getting checked out for Post-Concussion Syndrome.

[Nice to see you too, Bart.]

I've heard of people forging doctor's notes to get out of class...but a party?

I never knew you were so anti-social.

I'm not anti-social! I just didn't expect to see this.

And your first thought was that, clearly, you must be hallucinating. Because there's no way Dick or I would ever actually pull something like this.

It's kinda early for Christmas. I mean. The twelve days of Christmas, sure. But those start with Christmas. Not 5 days after Thanksgiving.

Haven you ever heard of Black Friday?

If anything, we're late to the party. Fashionably so, might I add.

Black Friday: the day when L.A. Traffic is even worse than normal. Real Christmasy. Puts you right in the mood when you move six inches a minute and Karen Carpenter's singing how "gee, the traffic is terrific."

Fortunately for us, not that many people seem to drive around here.

Not many Black Friday sales either.

Tell me about it.

I can already feel my poor wallet shaking in fear this season. One of the downsides to knowing so many people is that you have to remember to buy gifts for all of them.

[Not that she particularly minds.]

There's not anything cool enough to buy them.

Says you.

It's amazing what you can come up with if you think outside the box a little.

I still think the stores sell boring stuff. Not a Blast-o-matic 3000 to be found.

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[Oh no! Why won't you come over, Bart, come on.] But I was pretty sure you had a hard head! Has it all been a lie?

[Because Christmastime + capes = ridiculous attacks. Every year, Dick. Every. Year. He was robbed of his break from Christmas last year. Dang it, he's trying again this year.]

Nah. I've got a thick skull. But that just means something harder for the brain to slam against.

True, I will give you that one. But come on! It's not like you'll be slamming it up against anything really tough, like tinsel or something.

[Don't make him bring it up, Bart. You gave him the power.]

[Dick, noooooooo. Why would you do this to him? Don't be a dick.]

You just jinxed us all.

[It's just in his nature, to always have some dick inside him.]

I'm not unlucky! ...Well, I'm not always unlucky, but I'm feeling pretty good on this not jinxing anything deal. I think the red coat helps with that!

[.................... I can't. I can't respond to that.]

The red coat totally works.

[Don't mess with the pun bull, you'll get the awful pun horns.]

See, so long as you agree on how well the red coat works, there's no way anything can happen while this is around. [He pauses.]

We might need to make sure the coat never unravels or anything, though, it might require some thinking.

Look at your elf.

Now think about what you just said.

Which part, about the coat unraveling, or nothing happening?

The part about the coat unravelling!!

[Other people might have gone for exaggeration. Bart doesn't have time for that.]

[He's not entirely sure what he's getting at. At all.]

Is this something dirty, because there are young people present. Not very young, but younger. So still young. But I am not getting the joke?

Dick. It's not a joke. If you're serious about wanting the coat to stay in good shape, look at her and think.

[DICK GRAYSON YOU ARE STANDING NEXT TO A MAGICIAN.]

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