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Recently, I bought a personal item from one of the auctions in Markutte. In light of recent network posts of a festive Terran nature and having been exposed to Christmas before with far more ceremony, purely out of deference for a family member, I am aware that giving is very much in the spirit of the season. As purchasing gifts for a wide range of individuals would be a waste of resources and time which I must covet for my scientific studies, I am instead inclined to use the instrument in my possession.

It is a Vulcan harp.

[ Instruments, literal instrument ... Get it? ~~Whatever, his attempts at humor are golden.~~ Straight-faced, Spock leans back in his chair and settles it against his right shoulder, beginning to play. His left hand is bandaged, but he pays it no mind; after the post, green blood will have bitten through and the wraps will need changing.

Firstly, Brahms Intermezzo is played to invest people in the music he studied intently during his recreational time as a child. Shortly after that lulls to a close, you might think this stuffy Vulcan has nothing more interesting to offer but, son, you would be wrong. Music is mathematics, after all, and Spock adjusts the knobs on the instrument to alter the octaves and sounds to more of a guitar-quality. That's when he delves into an improvised piece still kicking around his memory, composed long before he set foot on the Enterprise. His final performance is a gentle carol he is very familiar with, for his own personal reasons, and he doesn't rush it into the previous natural rhythm in the slightest, almost playing for someone ... who has expressed their preferences on the matter before. (Perhaps the family member he mentioned at the start, for attentive listeners.)

The song is Silent Night. ]

( OOC: Vulcan harps/lyres are ridiculous, but these are the sound ranges, for reference. )

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[ On the one hand, this is Eridan's kinsman. On the other, Vulcan ain't give no shits after being so thoroughly insulted. Coolly, he responds, because there's no point allowing himself to care very much either way over someone so socially inept; there's a high likelihood Spock will find himself offended again, regardless. ]

Did you find the information you sought?

[ Maybe Karkat's apology is accepted and maybe it isn't. Spock overrides the topic for now. ]

Edited 2013-12-12 21:26 (UTC)

[Okay, pretty cold response, but he probably deserves it for acting the way he did. It makes sense. He sighs--not mad, more disappointed--but answers all the same.]

... Yeah. Yeah, I did. Some other people helped me out, and that file you sent was pretty good too, so thanks for that if I was too busy huffing my own nook to say it then.

You are welcome. [ Efficiency is clearly he route Spock is taking here. He's never liked bullies in any shape or form, whether they apologized or not, and so Karkat has forged one very hard nut to crack. ] Is there another way I can be of assistance?

[Well isn't this businesslike? Karkat frowns, biting at his lip a bit with his overbite.]

No. That's not why I contacted you, dude. I didn't mean to... Okay, so I did mean to at the time, but past me is consistently a dunderheaded shitstain at every opportunity he gets. Current me, as in I who am currently speaking to you, am saying on his behalf-slash-mine that I take back the shit I said and acknowledge that the attitude was unwarranted.

But if this whole asking if I need more help is a way of trying to get me to stop bothering you, just come out and say it plainly. I said it right at the start: if you want me to fuck off, I will. I'm not here to play passive aggressive guessing games of who can most politely tell the other to choke on a bulge. I am unloading upfront, transparent sincerity here, so don't feel like you have to dance around stuff for my sake. I didn't do it for you then.

Vulcans are incapable of being passive-aggressive, just as they cannot lie. I have no opinion on your conduct as you were, as you said, under a great deal of stress. Determining your true nature from one brief encounter would be liable to great inconstancy. It was inappropriate, but you are now well aware of the fact.

When you refer to your past self, are you implying you are schizophrenic?

[Vulcans? His eyebrows scrunch up. He didn't watch enough of the base video to see the green blood, or else he would have caught on. But really, what is it with people who look human but aren't? First the kedan--those in that form, anyway--and now this pointy eared weirdo.]

[That last remark has him scowling, though.]

Incapable of passive aggression, but not of blatant rudeness! No, I'm not schizophrenic, or any other psychobabble term. I have literally spoken to my own past and future selves via technological means, to say nothing of the dead alternate timeline selves populating an area I traveled through before I showed up here. It's got nothing to do with mental illness, and my verbal quirks on how I refer to myself and my past actions don't mean anything's screwed up in my lobe. Understand?

It is not rude to ask after the mental health of someone when they appear to be at odds with themselves. As it is, it is fortunate you are healthy in that regard. [ Tilting his head. ] How did you travel temporally, if I may ask?

[His eyebrows scrunch further. He... wasn't trying to be rude? What??]

[Karkat Vantas: emphatically does not get Vulcans.]

... No, I didn't mean like that. There was no actual time travel involved on my part. I'm not the Time person on my team. There was a chat client that had transtime capabilities; if you made a memo, people from the future or past could interject into the conversation as it was being written, including your own past and future selves. Which is what I'm saying - they're all me, this me, right here speaking to you, just from different points on the timeline.

Fascinating. Could you build one with the correct materials? A transtime chat client.

[Now frowning. His eyebrow scrunch eases up a little, though!]

No. I'm not a programmer; my specialty is coding viruses. Maybe if my friend were here he could replicate it, but as it happens he's nowhere near here.

Which methods do you use to create these viruses?

It's called coding, what do you think? With ~ATH, specifically.

[The way he pronounces it sounds like "til death".]

Fascinating. Those methods are somewhat dated from my viewpoint. Would you be willing to implant a virus into a localized unit for my perusal, if I delivered one into your hands?

[Up go his eyebrows at that.]

What for? I mean sure, I'll do it, but why do you want me to? And how the hell are they dated?

Is it highly possible our universes' respective technological advancement is not equal. As such, I wish to learn from yours. Initiating a virus implicates a heightened skill-level.

Heightened...

Do you fucking realize my species is highly advanced? We're space-faring conquerors, and before we went near-extinct we had planets all across the galaxy under our control. The Emperor here is like a fly next to our Empress. Did Eridan tell you nothing?

Regarding advancement, that is what I said, though evidently your greatest achievement to date has been finding offense where none has been offered.

You disingenuous prick. What do you call that right there? You got acting all superior like we're technologically behind you when I have yet to meet a single human who comes from an Earth where they've made it past their own moon. You don't know half what we've done. You don't know one single thing about what I, personally, have done.

Who cares that I led a team to victory in a game that all others I've heard of have failed spectacularly at playing, even over a time span over - [Give him a sec.] - six years? Who cares that I literally had part in creating a universe? Not just a species, not a planet, not a solar system or a galaxy, but an entire fucking universe?

Or does that not matter in to your judgement just because I happened to get mad at a thing?

I did not say your universe was technologically behind. The comment was left open to interpretation as neither of us can know which of our realities is more advanced and how they would align their accomplishments if a baseline were to be found. Your personal life is of no interest to me, as I have inferred mine is of none to you. As such, you are creating dissent in furthering your misunderstanding of my intentions by attempting to draw me into an altercation.

[His eyebrows drawn in, nose wrinkling up as he listens to what he says. It's not the way he says it; he's spoken enough to others with fondness for big words and odd word choices that it rolls off his back. It's more the content.]

Okay, first off? Don't complain about me talking about my personal life when you're the one who presumed my greatest accomplishment was such a piece of shit. You don't get to turn around and say "I don't care" when I prove you that solidly wrong, assmunch.

And if your society is that great in the technology department, try telling me how.

I did not presume, I inferred from our previous interactions. Seventy-eight point two percent of the time during our conversations, you have exhibited unprovoked hostile reactions. As a Vulcan, I am unable to "care" in the sense you are implying.

I am bound by the Prime Directive not to share information that may prove detrimental to another culture. Unless you are sworn to the same rule, logically I suggest you begin.

... What?

[Karkat outright gawks at him. None of that made sense.]

What the hell is a Vulcan? And what you mean, you can't care?

Vulcans eschew emotion for logic. I am one.

[Karkat stares a good while longer. His confusion shifts gradually, slipping from confusion to frustration, and finally mixing with reluctant resignation.]

You don't even look that different from humans. Pointy ears and... and what? I guess your eyebrows are weird, but so what? Is that it?

And why would you give up emotion? Emotion isn't just some frivolous social add-on to toss away at will. No wonder you come off like a condescending jackass half the time.

[ Not about to defend his entire culture's decision to alter their worldly perceptions to one disrespectful teenage alien, he arches one of those weird brows. ]

I believe we are done here. Eridan will no doubt gladly assist you in clarifying your misconceptions.

[ And he hangs up. ]

[--]

crabmunicator - 2013-12-18 04:13 (UTC) - Expand

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