♒ 6th VIDEO

[unconchonable]

[The feed turns on to show Eridan, surely his is a face everyone wants to see so soon, especially after his last post. Though, he looks really fidgety. Drumming his fingers on the desk as he starts:]

So, back when I was on my planet, Alternia, I used to do this thing. Orphanin'. Y'know, go around killin' the lusii a other trolls. I mean, it serwed a purpose, was no mindless slaughter or the like. Was actually a pretty damn honorable job to hawe. Probably the most if I'm bein' honest here. Thankless though it were.

[Is this story time with Eridan? It is possible. The finger drumming intensifies continues. His fins are even flicking here and there with notable agitation as he tries to keep up the ruse of being anything but. Stoic is the aim, but sadly Eridan's aim falls pretty far from the mark when it concerns anything that ain't a gun or wand.]

See, it was called Orphanin', 'cos unlike you pink animals who raise their young all weird an' sympathetic-like, we trolls are taken in by beasts-- [as if on cue, there's a rather large white seahorse peeking into view. Eridan spares him a glance, before shoving his head out of view. He's really a polite child, even to the creature that raised him. But hey, maybe that explains a few things! How mannerly could a guy even be when he was raised by a giant floating seahorse?]

--anyway, it was my job to lay slaughter to a good amount a them, leawin' many a troll without their lusus, like I was some kickass royal slayer or some such. Which I was, don't need you lot thinkin' different and such. The ocean was my killin' cauldron, really...


[He lets out a near dreamy sigh recalling those good memories. But honestly, it just frustrates him more than anything.]

...kinda got off track there for a sec, the whole bloody point a this is to say I'm pretty fuckin' restless as a late, an' sponge numbingly bored. I'm more used to hawin' far more... [violent] things to do.

So, I figured to myself, that I'd ask you lot if you knew a any places where there may be a influx a beasts. I think my intentions are obwious, but I mean, if I don't do somethin' and soon I may be liable to kill someone outta boredom.

[A PAUSE FOR DRAMATIC EFFECT...]

An exaggeration, a course.

HOWEWER, I suppose I could shed some consideration an' ask if you pink skinned beasts got some sorta taboo concernin' the harm a random beasts, but surely you ain't that sensitiwe of a species... right?

[See, He can totally be all sorts of considerate, nothing but consideration here! He's even aiming his pent up violent frustrations at animals and not people!! Such consideration. He's like a dog that's been in its kennel all day with no way to burn off that violent energy, so he's... trying, at least?]

Or, if any a you got any better ideas, I guess I'm willin' to listen to it. But it better not be something's stupid like "hawe you tried not bein' wiolent?" 'Cos fuck that noise.

Comments

[parallels]

That's one of many things I'm into.

Otherwise, if you want to brave the cold, we could go turtle sliding. Or do a bit of cooking. Or all of the above.

[unconchonable]

Turtle sleddin'?

[IS THAT REALLY A THING?]

Don't got much talent for cookin'. [Which isn't a direct "no" to the offer.]

[parallels]

Dunno if you've heard, but I'm a mum to a bouncing baby turtle the size of a small tank. He likes sledding down the snow hills. Likes it even better if you're riding on his shell.

[SO YES, DEFINITELY A THING.]

I could teach you if you wanted.

[unconchonable]

Oh. Huh. I'd think it pretty damn cold for them, but I guess they ain't all that bothered. Still too cold for me, I'm afraid.

[TOO BAD SNOW IS COLD.]

Hmm. [HE'S REALLY THINKING THIS OVER, LOOK AT HIM CUPPING HIS CHIN AND EVERYTHING.] Maybe. I mean, I guess it wouldn't hurt nothin' to learn.

[parallels]

Not a fan of the cold either, but Tennyson doesn't seem to mind. And being a proper parent means entertaining the baby.

[She watches him, vaguely amused as she waits for his answer.]

Definitely wouldn't hurt. Might even be convenient if you get hungry at night while everyone else is asleep and there aren't any left overs.

[unconchonable]

You're at least warm blooded. I ain't. Also don't know shit about bein' a proper parent, so if it means you gotta suffer for that thing, then I'm certainly glad I'll newer hawe such a obligation.

[Oh, she does raise a good point.]

Okay, that's true. Fine. I guess you can teach me to cook. But don't expect me to start cookin' meals for eweryone or somethin.

[parallels]

Well, thankfully, I've always wanted to be a mum.

[She grins and gives him a nod.]

Good, because I would have been very cross if I'd been woken up at night to make dinner. Next evening you're free, let me know, I'll give you a few lessons.