♒ 6th VIDEO

[unconchonable]

[The feed turns on to show Eridan, surely his is a face everyone wants to see so soon, especially after his last post. Though, he looks really fidgety. Drumming his fingers on the desk as he starts:]

So, back when I was on my planet, Alternia, I used to do this thing. Orphanin'. Y'know, go around killin' the lusii a other trolls. I mean, it serwed a purpose, was no mindless slaughter or the like. Was actually a pretty damn honorable job to hawe. Probably the most if I'm bein' honest here. Thankless though it were.

[Is this story time with Eridan? It is possible. The finger drumming intensifies continues. His fins are even flicking here and there with notable agitation as he tries to keep up the ruse of being anything but. Stoic is the aim, but sadly Eridan's aim falls pretty far from the mark when it concerns anything that ain't a gun or wand.]

See, it was called Orphanin', 'cos unlike you pink animals who raise their young all weird an' sympathetic-like, we trolls are taken in by beasts-- [as if on cue, there's a rather large white seahorse peeking into view. Eridan spares him a glance, before shoving his head out of view. He's really a polite child, even to the creature that raised him. But hey, maybe that explains a few things! How mannerly could a guy even be when he was raised by a giant floating seahorse?]

--anyway, it was my job to lay slaughter to a good amount a them, leawin' many a troll without their lusus, like I was some kickass royal slayer or some such. Which I was, don't need you lot thinkin' different and such. The ocean was my killin' cauldron, really...


[He lets out a near dreamy sigh recalling those good memories. But honestly, it just frustrates him more than anything.]

...kinda got off track there for a sec, the whole bloody point a this is to say I'm pretty fuckin' restless as a late, an' sponge numbingly bored. I'm more used to hawin' far more... [violent] things to do.

So, I figured to myself, that I'd ask you lot if you knew a any places where there may be a influx a beasts. I think my intentions are obwious, but I mean, if I don't do somethin' and soon I may be liable to kill someone outta boredom.

[A PAUSE FOR DRAMATIC EFFECT...]

An exaggeration, a course.

HOWEWER, I suppose I could shed some consideration an' ask if you pink skinned beasts got some sorta taboo concernin' the harm a random beasts, but surely you ain't that sensitiwe of a species... right?

[See, He can totally be all sorts of considerate, nothing but consideration here! He's even aiming his pent up violent frustrations at animals and not people!! Such consideration. He's like a dog that's been in its kennel all day with no way to burn off that violent energy, so he's... trying, at least?]

Or, if any a you got any better ideas, I guess I'm willin' to listen to it. But it better not be something's stupid like "hawe you tried not bein' wiolent?" 'Cos fuck that noise.

Comments

video

[parallels]

[Wrinkliest of nose wrinkles in the history of the universe. Even Mary Poppins would have a field day with Eridan. But there's that familiar sense of pity that she feels whenever Eridan talks about his culture. Poor kid.]

Just don't bring any dead things into the house. Though, I'm just going to suggest-books, films, or video games instead? Less messy.

video

[unconchonable]

I got books. Not that big of a fan a wideo games, and I'm indifferent to mowies for the most part. But ewen then it ain't gonna scratch the itch I got goin'. This ain't idle boredom.

Besides, I don't mind messy.

video;

[warrioreidlos]

That sounds like quite the job. What were you killing them for?

[Reiner doesn't really seem to be judging either way, but then, that is mostly cause he doesn't necessarily trust all the facts he is given. It certainly sounds like a necessary evil when stated like that, but then, he had believed in a lot of senseless things when he was a kid too.]

And if you want something to do, you can always exercise, right? There's a bit of snow on the ground, but that just means you have to run quicker to stay warm.

video;

[unconchonable]

For the surwiwal a the species. If I hadn't, eweryone includin' me would be long since dead. Sponges exploded outta our cranial orifices and gorey shit suchlike that.

[He huffs]

I don't exactly work like that. I'm a seadweller, cold-blooded, so I don't particularly generate my own body heat. But I guess exercisin' wouldn't be too horrid a idea. Though less satisfyin'.

[ not here ]

[beunbroken]

[Elizabeth is just looking at the screen in abject horror. This kid has gotten even worse than the last time she spoke to him.

Seriously, he's kinda up there with Comstock and Fitzroy at this point.

Killing people (or trolls) is wrong.]

[not here ]

[unconchonable]

[Sorry Elizabeth, he's kind of horrible on a lot of levels. And he ain't even remotely sorry.]

video;

[andaway]

You did what to the other trolls? For what purpose?!

[Sorry Eridan, you kind of lost Clark there. He'd known there were creatures from a harsher environment around but killing. As a job. A job to be proud of?]

video;

[unconchonable]

Orphaned them. But don't worry, they weren't orphans long. I mean, unless you count a corpse as a orphan still.

[Those are comforting words, right?]

[fearlessherosheart]

Well, I suppose if one's skill is such that one can only handle beasts and children...

[In other words, Tazendra is bored herself and spoiling for a fight, and insulting bullies is one of her favorite methods of getting into them. That and she figures that is Eridan's goal: be enough of a jerkface so someone alleviates his boredom by challenging him.]

Bah, you are far too young for a proper duel, at least with me.

[unconchonable]

[That gets an annoyed stare.]

First off, these beasts were no flippin' joke. They'd tear most skilled warriors to shreds in the blink of a ganderbulb. That said, they still fell far below my skill lewel when it comes to combat.

[a beat]

I could take you. Age don't mean a damn bloody thing.

video

[mightythinice]

[oh hell no, he wasn't about to move in on her hunting territory. Ellie was having absolutely none of that, especially since his explanation just fell on deaf ears]

Your culture is still really fucked up, you know that?

Tch. [she rubs her nose, annoyed]

That said, I'm not telling you where all the animals are, 'cause some of us make a living hunting them.

video

[unconchonable]

Don't see how it is, but whatewer.

[He raises an eyebrow at her, looking amused more than anything.]

What's the matter, 'fraid I'm gonna stomp you in huntin' ability? At least you got the sense to recognize your better.

[supremefaith]

Depending on what you consider beasts, you just called...what I think you're referring to as humans...beasts. If you can't make the distinction you might want to hold tight.

[unconchonable]

I can make the distinction between those that are feral and those that aren't as feral. You're all animals compared to me and my kind, at least.

[Video]

[tony_redgrave]

[Now isn't that an interesting idea?]

Nice story, Points.

[No he is seriously never using your real name. Not until you've earned it, anyway. Buuuut.]

So what you're tryin' to say is you haven't had a good workout in a while, and you're lookin' to play.

[Is that what you're saying because that's the best thing he's heard out of your yap trap yet. This place is way too tame, not any good parties to be had anywhere. Dante would know, he's looked.

He totally agrees with the 'not being violent' not being an option though, one thing they can agree on.]

[Video]

[unconchonable]

I wouldn't guess you got somethin' to offer in this case, hmm?

[Eridan looks rather doubtful of that. He's fairly convinced this tool is all talk.]

video;

[imaginate]

[So here he is, in uniform, chewing an apple while on lunch break.]

I dunno, another job? You're doing pretty well being a total moron.

video;

[unconchonable]

Oh it's you.

[SIGH]

An' how exactly am I bein' a moron, hmm?

Video

[ixis]

One must question the presumed superiority of a being who cannot contain himself. An apex predator is not inherently better than the rest of the chain; it is simply more savage.

Though I admire your self-awareness if nothing else, boy.

video

[unconchonable]

Sawagery ain't really frowned upon where I'm from.

[A thoughtful pause]

Though I ain't one to rely on such baser actions if I can help it. I'm just a little frustrated is all. Nothin' to get all antsy about. Or to question my superiority ower. It's this natural wiolent streak my race has that has lead us to wictory ower countless planets, so you best watch yourself before I giwe you a prime example as to why we're a feared fuckin' race a conquerors.

video.

[bolthead]

[Congratulations, Eridan, Barry doesn't even know where to start. His expression and tone are decidedly horrified, but there's an undercurrent of anger.]

You orphaned children for fun?

video.

[unconchonable]

Did I say it was for fun? No the fuck I didn't.

[EYE ROLL]

If you MUST know, if I didn't do it, ewery last one a them would be dead includin' me. My job was fuckin' necessary.

... don't mean I didn't enjoy the burden of it, though.

permanon text;

[denyamenti]

A dog incapable of being trained should be put down.

text;

[unconchonable]

and a opinion from someone wwho has to hide themselvves like a cowward goes completely ignored

video;

[crabmunicator]

['Sup Eridan? Because that's Karkat right there, gawking, looking uncomprehending as heck.]

How the hell is your lusus alive and here?

video;

[unconchonable]

Oh. He's been aliwe for a while now.

[Wow Eridan, that certainly answered the question!]

Not sure how, but I found him last landfall. He was up for sale at some auction, was insultin' to be honest. As if such a noble lusus should ewer be sold like he's some possession.

video;

[candystriped]

[ looooooong judging look ]

video;

[unconchonable]

[He stares right back at her.]




What?

video;

[loquaciouslyfeline]

[Ah, that certainly does explain a lot about Eridan's appalling response to the death of the Emperor. Not that it excuses it, in Amelia's mind, but it gives insight on how horribly twisted this boy's life must have been.]

While I can't say I care much for the... duties demanded by your culture, I may have an idea of how to redirect your urges in a more productive direction. You had mentioned, I believe, an interest in joining your own people's forces when you had come of age, though that did not come to pass.

[A short pause, only for presentation's sake.]

With the advent of recent events, there has been an initiative to form a military organization of our own, so as to protect Keeliai from outside threats. The Keeliai Aerial Corps, as proposed by one Temeraire.

[Amelia is too proper to listen in on other's conversations, and remains unaware of the roaring incident between the dragon and the troll. This won't end badly at all!]

I should hope it would go without saying that your potential involvement in such an organization will require a greater attentiveness to cultural sensitivities on your part. That is to say, homicidal rampages will not be tolerated.

[A good structured stint will do good for him, she believes. Make a better person of him. She's seen it happen before, and though Eridan is much worse than Jim ever was, he's still young.

Good luck with that, Amelia!]

video;

[unconchonable]

[It certainly does! He levels a stare at her, curious of what she's going on about. He certainly looks interested.]

Interestin' concept, but I dunno if I'd be cut out for it.

[a beat]

Not that I ain't cut out for military things, I certainly am, don't let a fuckin' fool tell you otherwise, but I dunno if I could play subordinate to someone who ain't my equal. But I'll consider it.

[He dutifully ignores that comment about cultural sensitivities, because fuck that, he does what he wants!!]