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[rakash]

[The network gets an eyeful of weathered, gaunt and very green goblin features as the hooded creature straightens in his chair from fiddling about with the keys. There's half a toothy grin on his lined face; when he speaks his voice is like the bastard child of gravel and sandpaper.]

There we go, I'm a fuckin' natural at this. Anyway, hi, how are ya. I've had a few chats on this thing but for the benefit of the rest of you bums - and I mean that in a very caring way - the name's Styx.

First off, let's get it out of the way: yeah I'm a fuckin' goblin, yeah I fuckin' talk, yeah it's a fuckin' miracle. And if you don't have goblins in your homeland and don't know what I'm talking about, congratulations. I'll make sure someone delivers your medal.

More importantly, who's a guy gotta kill to find steady work around here? I'm not a fucking merchant's helper, you get me? But you need a scout, you need someone or something tracked down, someone's got your property and you need it fetched back quiet-like, that kind of shit, you're singin' my song. [Or, you know, spying and assassinations, that'll work too. But he'd be stupid to be too loud about that in front of too large a crowd.] Last job I took was guiding a guy through hostile territory, real nasty time but I fuckin' got him where he had to go. I don't play around.

Speaking of which, last thing. I doubt he's here or the wallpaper wouldn't be looking so pretty anymore, but I gotta mention it. Anybody runs into an orc named Arkaïl - bigger than me, greener than me, not half as charming though - you send that lunkhead my way. Guy's dogshit at diplomacy, I can't take my eyes off him for ten minutes. Orcs, am I right?

...unless he broke something or owes you money, in which case I've never met him.

Comments

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[rakash]

[His grin widens noticeably at the rebuke. Sorry, but he's a low-class creature to the core and he's not sorry at all.] Heh. Depends on your definition of "limited." [The only goblin in the world with the gift of speech and he wastes his precious talent on mastering linguistic filth. For shame, Styx.]

Anyway. Touring ain't really the kind of guide I meant, but hell, work is work. Good sense of direction, sparkling personality. I'm all set! [Light-hearted, right on the edge of rough laughter. He's damn well no sparkling anything, that's for sure. Still, it wouldn't be the worst job he ever picked up to make ends meet.]

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[alwaysmother]

Indeed. [Her definition probably has something to do with the use of profanity in nearly every statement. She would gladly help him to expound upon his use of language.]

I bring it up precisely because you might make a business of it for yourself. We have helpful individuals who fill us in on specific details when we get here, but no one has ever provided me with a real tour. [So if you ever want to go into a business for yourself it may very well be a good place to start.]

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[rakash]

And nothing reeks like being stuck in unfamiliar territory, no arguments from me. Course, I'm no good for the job 'til I know the city, but if nobody beats me to it...well, we'll see.

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[alwaysmother]

Arguably you would have to become familiar with your own surroundings at first and the newer residents might not have the means to pay you very well, both would be concerns of starting up such a business.