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[Gene turns on the feed and is about to speak. He opens his mouth to say something, and then, quite suddenly - there is a large amount of snow coating his hair. And half the inside of his suite. Among the snow is a vast collection of random junk, including some Angry Birds robots and other things people may recognize as once belonging to an absentee trickster god.

Also there's a bloodhound. A bloodhound which is rolling around in the snow and saying indistinct things about entrails and murder. Standard stuff, really, for a bloodhound.

Gene closes his mouth, whatever he was about to say forgotten in the wake of this new fuckery. He looks back, taking in the scene behind him for a good five seconds, and turns back to the camera, his face a mask of utter, dangerous calm.]

Loki...

[He takes a deep breath. The mask of calm shatters when he yells:]

...what the fuck?!

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These days, it seems like existing is enough.

Well, at least he gave you a nice pet. Good doggy!

You should name him Rex. Or Spot.

No way. I'm not keeping it. Once I figure out how to slip a leash on it, I'm dragging the beast right back to Loki.

Oooh, don't do that, my friend. Returning a gift to a trickster god? Means you will have seven more show up in your house tomorrow.

Keep it. Name it. Feed it. Dote on it and make it your best friend. Trust me on this one.

...good point.

I have no idea how to take care of a normal dog, let alone...that.

[In the background, Thori says something that sounds an awful lot like "FEAST UPON THEIR FLESH." Thori, no.]

Well, I think a rawhide bone or sow's ear might keep him from setting your house on fire.

Where's Cesar Millan when you need him?

[Sarcastically:] Yeah, I'll just get myself down to the local pet store.

...who?

[He doesn't understand that reference.]

[Welcome to Stiles' life on the turtle, where nobody gets his references. Except, like, Darcy.]

Never mind. Maybe you could hunt up some swizards fro him to chew on, instead.

[Don't feel bad, Stiles. He totally would, except he doesn't give a crap about pop culture except for what Pepper foisted onto him. And Game of Thrones. Which Pepper foisted onto him.]

Maybe taking it hunting might tire it out.

See? There ya go. And who knows, maybe you'll form a bond with him, and he will save your life someday.

Or maybe he'll scorch your eyebrows off, it could go either way.