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[Gene turns on the feed and is about to speak. He opens his mouth to say something, and then, quite suddenly - there is a large amount of snow coating his hair. And half the inside of his suite. Among the snow is a vast collection of random junk, including some Angry Birds robots and other things people may recognize as once belonging to an absentee trickster god.

Also there's a bloodhound. A bloodhound which is rolling around in the snow and saying indistinct things about entrails and murder. Standard stuff, really, for a bloodhound.

Gene closes his mouth, whatever he was about to say forgotten in the wake of this new fuckery. He looks back, taking in the scene behind him for a good five seconds, and turns back to the camera, his face a mask of utter, dangerous calm.]

Loki...

[He takes a deep breath. The mask of calm shatters when he yells:]

...what the fuck?!

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[Aaaand now it's trying to set a table aflame. Wonderful. Gene scoops some snow over the flaming area, bare-handed, before turning back to the camera.]

What did I do in my life to deserve this?

[You know exactly what you did, Temujin. Don't even play.]

Maybe someone told the dog you're a cat person.

[Not that the Parker household was much one for pets.]

Do you want any help with Torchy there before you run out of furniture?

Yeah, I could probably use the help. As much as I enjoy the Fire Sector, this isn't what I had in mind when I chose to live here.

I don't think I know anyone who would want to have a swearing, fire-breathing pet dog...

[In or out of costume.]

What's your suite address? I can get over there pretty quick.

FI-1C. Hopefully you can get here before this thing commits any more arson.

[Watching something else go up with a 'FWOOSH' of fire on the other side of the screen...]

I think it's too late for that, but I'll be there as fast as I can. See you in a few!

[There she ends the feed.

With the help of a little bit of going from rooftop to rooftop in a few places, she makes it to the building Gene's suite is in in pretty good time- fast enough to not completely be useless, but not too fast for him to be suspicious of how she got there so quickly.

It's not too hard to find the right door, what with the smoke from the fire, and she knocks.]

Hey, are you still alive in there?

[Gene answers the door, and a billowing cloud of smoke accompanies him. Thori has decided that burning the drapes is a fine idea.]

Yeah, I'm still alive, [he says, coughing a little,] though not for lack of this thing trying.

I'd say I'm surprised, but considering what Loki's done in my universe... [Up to and including killing Captain America in front of plenty of heroes in New York.]

Have you tried spraying him with water or anything? [That's what you do with bad dogs, right?]

The fact that people seem to react to him with horror rather than annoyance means I clearly have great taste in friends. [Clearly.]

Well...I threw some snowballs at him. It kind of worked. Until he decided that melting them in midair was a fun game to try.

[This does not exactly sound like he's got a handle on the situation.]

I think you're going to need help from someone who knows how to put their foot down.

And hey, you're not that badly off. Even if you made friends with the god of lies. [Seriously, who does that? Apparently Gene.] You made friends with me, afer all.

[That was a declaration, Gene. Just roll with it and you won't get hurt.]

Edited 2014-02-25 04:43 (UTC)

I really don't know how to deal with dogs. [Aside from Tony.] Especially not...this kind of dog.

I--what? [PEOPLE NEED TO STOP MAKING FRIENDS WITH HIM. It's getting weird and unsettling. May's Pepper Quotient is increasing by the minute.]

Friends. You know, that thing where people who share things in common, like each other to some extent, and hang out willingly?

[It counts!]

I don't think anyone knows how to deal with this kind of dog.

Yeah, no, I just--

I'm not used to people walking up to me and saying we're friends now.

[He's really not.]

I'm not even sure Loki knows how...anyway, come on in, and please, try and dodge the flaming furniture.

Sounds like people are losing out.

And before we go in there, just to make sure: do you have a fire extinguisher or anything?

No, I don't. Got lots of snow, though, which seems to be doing the trick so far.

[Losing out??? With him??? May clearly doesn't know him very well, and for that he's glad.]

[You say that now, but if she knew she'd just try harder.]

Well, I hope it keeps working.

[And into the fray? The fire? The hot burning desire of an evil dog to conquer everything with flame? Yeah, that.]

You and me both.

[Aaaannddd things are aflame. Thori is happily rolling around in the melting snow.]

This looks way worse in person.

[She's beginning to regret saying she'd come over, because now that May thinks about it, she has no idea what to do in case of anything on fire that's bigger than an oven mitt except get everyone out of the building.]

Okay- I have no idea what to do next.

Oh good, [Gene says, far too calmly,] neither do I.

[He actually does have an idea, and rips some singed curtains down from the wall. He hands one to May.]

Crazy idea. Let's round it up.

[She grabs hold of the curtains handed to her, and looks at Gene, just to make sure.]

The dog?

[Gene stares at her, almost as if he's questioning his choice of assistant hellhound-wranglers.]

Yes. The dog.

[Considering that there's still stuff on fire she isn't sure what his priorities are, okay?]

Okay, this shouldn't be too hard, right? I mean-

Whoa!

[Jet of flame! Bad dog!

And that's also an excellently done front flip to get out of the way on her part.]

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