[Console] Video;

[lasergrenades]

[When the screen comes on there is a face just a little too close to the camera; it’s got freckles and red hair. The figure scoots back a bit, and a young woman in her late teens appears, grinning nervously.]

Uh, hiiii. I’m Pepper. Pepper Potts. I come from a city called New York which some of you have probably heard of and if you haven’t you should because its awesome. Or, it was awesome before a bunch of aliens came and tried to destroy the planet, which they might still do, I got here before we blew up the ship when I got teleported, so it might not be so awesome when you go visit. [She pauses, catching herself.] Er. If, I guess. Sorry, I talk a lot when I’m nervous, apparently, that’s what everyone always tells me. Actually they say I talk too much all the time, not just when I'm nervous. Especially Tony and Rhodey and Gene. Oh! Yeah, I'm from the same place as Tony and Gene. Well, not exactly, we came here from different places, or something, which I don't really understand yet.

[She takes a deep breath and tries to slow down the torrent of words.] Anyway. I hear there’s some big bad running around and since I’m kind of used to fighting supervillains I’m totally there if you need someone to help with butt-kicking. Probably.

[Pepper sags a little bit.]

I could use some help figuring out what to do here. I’m supposed to get a job and all I ever wanted to be is a SHIELD agent. I could help...organize...things? Unless someone needs a personal shopper, in which case I am so there.

Comments

[valevectorian]

That other trouble would be cultists who apparently gave a damn about "Mr. Bad Singer."

[At the mention of the 'necklace,' though, his face scrunches up in displeasure. The 'necklace' in question is tight around his neck. It's hard to tell without taking a good look, but there is a black box connected to the left side of it; that's where the wires connect to.]

It's not a necklace, and no, I didn't.

[lasergrenades]

So he's got a fan club. Great. I never could understand why bad guys need roadies. Like, seriously, if you're not bad enough to do it yourself you need to go back to supervillain school, or whatever.

[She's dissociating a little bit, like she always does. It helps her to handle scary situations with a bit of humor.]

Oh, sorry. [Touchy subject apparently. Rein it in, Potts.] Um, I guess I should have asked your name first.

[valevectorian]

Because religious fanatics always flock to that type, I suppose. It's not the first time I've seen them follow world-destroying entities.

[Very good, Pepper, you got it in one.]

Yeah, you probably should have. [Especially since he usually doesn't care to introduce himself first without a good reason.] It's Accelerator.

[lasergrenades]

[Pepper shrugs.] That or they just really like the uniforms.

[She raises her eyebrows slightly at Accelerator. Usually she's the rude blunt one in a conversation.]

Well, you could have said it first, too. Does it mean anything, where you're from? Where are you from?

[valevectorian]

Somehow I doubt it's the uniforms.

[he raises his brows right back at her. Meet Accelerator: Rudeness Made Flesh!]

I could have. I just usually don't care. [pauses] Yes, it does, and from Academy City. It's right next to Tokyo.

[He skips explaining the meaning of his name for the time being.]

[lasergrenades]

Makes a lot more sense than religious adoration, if you ask me.

[Wow, Accelerator is almost as bad as Whitney. They're going to get along juuuust fine.]

Last I checked they still had manners in Japan. Does everybody have science-y names there?

[valevectorian]

After some of the religious terrorist magicians I've come across, I'll have to beg to differ.

[shrugs]

There's always exceptions to the rule. No, they don't. Mine is a codename.

[lasergrenades]

Whoa! Like, actual magicians with actual magic? What was that like?

[This place is way more exciting than Pepper thought. Now you'll never be rid of her, Accelerator. She's gonna be stuck on you like glue until you tell her everything. In detail. No matter how rude you are.]

Ooh, so are you like a spy, or something? That is so cool! I have another name too, but it's not a code or anything, I just made it up. Gotta keep secret identity secret, you probably know how it is.

[valevectorian]

Extremely annoying. They caused World War III. [Just let that sink in, Pepper. Annoying? That's an understatement.] Let me guess, you're from someplace where magic is just make-believe bullshit found only in fiction.

No, I'm not a spy. Even if I was, I'd be a piss poor spy to admit that somewhere in public.

[lasergrenades]

Oh. [Beat.] That sucks. Ours usually just tried to blow up the world or take over New York. [And then there was the Mandarin, who did both but in reverse.] We don't have magic, no, but we've got portals and mutants that can control metal or read minds, oh and then there's the Hulk, and Mr. Fix, and Whiplash, and the Living Laser, and Dr. Doom who we thought was doing magic but just turned out to be science again. [She's counting them off on her fingers.] Stuff that other people might call magic if they didn't spend their free time flying around in a suit of armor. Can other people do magic, too? I mean not the bad guys.

[Pepper grins at Accelerator with her perpetual cheerfulness, as if to say 'C'mon, tell me more'.]

Well, duh, if you were still at home. It wouldn't matter now that you're on the back of a turtle in a different dimension.

[She's getting remarkably comfortable now that she can inflict her curiosity on people who aren't used to it by now.]

[valevectorian]

Ugh. Do you ever shut up?

Yes, yes some can. No, I don't know much about it.

xD /dying over here

[lasergrenades]

Not usually. I did say that I talk a lot, so it's not like I didn't warn you. You could always be nice and ask me to stop talking instead of being such a jerk about it.

[She's still smiling, but she's raised an eyebrow in minor annoyance.

Well, tell me what you do know, then.

[valevectorian]

Yeah, I don't really do 'nice.'

I don't recall being under any obligation to tell you anything. I only bother with what I feel like telling people.

[lasergrenades]

If you're not nice and you weren't prepared to tell me something, which you have already, then why did you respond in the first place? Talking to me is a pretty nice thing to do, you know.

[valevectorian]

To kill time. And like I said, I only bother with what I feel like telling people.

You're not taking this shit personally, are you?

[lasergrenades]

What, am I your entertainment now?

[She's a little irritated, but not so much that she's going to end the feed.]

And I won't now that I figured out you're just a giant grumpmuffin.

[valevectorian]

...Grumpmuffin?

[lasergrenades]

What? You are grumpy. Don't take it personally. [Pepper smiles again.] I'd bet you'd be all right over coffee, too, hence the muffin.

[valevectorian]

No one over the age of ten would use the term 'grumpmuffin' if they wanted to be taken seriously.

[lasergrenades]

Oh, lighten up. It was supposed to be a joke. They have to have those in Academy City.

[valevectorian]

Sure. But my sense of humor's been largely dead for years.

[lasergrenades]

No wonder you're so grumpy. You must still find something funny.

[valevectorian]

And if I say I don't?

[lasergrenades]

I probably won't believe you. [ She shrugs.] Everyone finds something funny, even if no one else understands why.

[valevectorian]

You go on and think that, then. I stand by my statement, and I don't see much of a point of wasting effort on convincing a random person I just met.