[Video]

[meanandgreen]

[Things just kept gettin’ better and better. Last thing he remembers is getting attacked on that rooftop by a bunch of Pinocchio wannabes pretending to be ninja. And now? Now he’s stuck in another dimension in some city that’s supposedly floating on a giant freakin’ turtle.

Needless to say, Raph was Not Happy. He had no idea where his brothers were, and he was starting to wonder if this was like the thing with Draco and the Daimyo’s son. Constantly getting hurled into other dimensions was really starting to tick him off.

At least those kedan guys seemed all right. They took it pretty well when he’d given one of them the shakedown while he was trying to figure out what the shell happened. The guy didn’t even fight back, and Raph felt kind of bad about it in retrospect, but there was nothing he could do about that now.

The best part was that most of these guys around here looked just as weird as him. Some of them were even uglier. You never knew if the guy next to you was gonna have tentacles or gills or an extra arm. He liked it. Kinda felt like walking around the Battle Nexus. Even the buildings looked kinda similar.

That was the only reason why Raph even thought of getting on that computer. Since nobody's screamed or tried to dissect him yet, the way he looked obviously wasn't a factor, and if he was gonna find his brothers, it was the quickest and the easiest way to do it. Not to say it still didn't make him nervous, but finding his bros was all he cared about. He'd just have to suck it up and be careful, because the sooner he found them, the sooner he could get his hands on whoever the heck was responsible for this mess.

And if he couldn't find them, then he'd just have to do it alone.

So, here goes nothin'.]

Bet you think you're real funny, puttin' me on a giant turtle. People seriously gotta work on their sense of humor.

[Raph's not even sure if whoever's responsible for this little unexpected vacation can hear him, but he's mad, okay? So what if he vents a little?

He glowers into the camera, cracking his knuckles]

Any of you people know how the heck we got here? 'Cause I'm about this close to marchin' into that palace and showin' little miss Emperor exactly what I think about her business.

[All right. Enough of that. Gotta keep it together. He folds his arms over his chest, getting down to the real reason he posted this.]

And I'm lookin' for my brothers. They look a lot like me, so you'd know it if you saw 'em.

[He's kinda dreading the answer to that last one. Wouldn't be the first time he wound up in another dimension alone, but after that crazy fight back home, he just needed to know they were okay.]

Comments

[zerotoawesome]

[Yeah, sorry, but this guy just ignored everything you were saying.]

Dude, do you speak turtle?

[meanandgreen]

[What. The shell. Who is this clown?]

Yeah. I speak butt-kickin' too. And if I hear any more turtle jokes I'll really start talking.

[zerotoawesome]

[Oh jeez, cranky turtle guy. Santo cracks his knuckles, since he has to represent.]

Oh yeah? I'm pretty fluent in that myself. Freaking bilingual, even.

[meanandgreen]

Now you're speakin' my language.

[He may be cranky, but after his initial freakout with the kedan, he's got his head together enough not to pick random fights with guys that look like they're made of solid rock. But man is it tempting.]

Ever try goin' against the emperor?

[zerotoawesome]

Just make sure I don't have to give you a vocab lesson, bro.

[He's joking, really. He doesn't really want to fight a turtle guy if he doesn't have to. Raph must be some kind of endangered species or something.]

I've only been here for a few days. I haven't even seen an emperor, much less tried to kick their ass. Why're you interested in some spoiled rich guy anyway?

[meanandgreen]

[He grits his teeth at that threat, but he really needs to keep his temper in check. Save it for the Emperor and her goons.]

Girl. I guess she's the one that brought us here, and I'm the one that's gonna make her put us back.

[zerotoawesome]

[It's not so much a threat as it is Santo needing to look tough forever.]

Wait, it's a girl emperor? Dude, you can't just go around beating up girls. I mean, not unless they're evil.

Is she?

[meanandgreen]

She kidnapped us from our homes and is keepin' people captive for who knows what. So yeah, she seems pretty evil to me.

[zerotoawesome]

Dude, and believe me this is weird coming from me, but I'm not so sure it was her. I mean, considering we're supposed to be dead or whatever.

And if she could send us home, I think people would have made her by now.

[meanandgreen]

[Dead. Stuck somewhere between life, death, and dreaming. Probably not dead, the kedan guys said. Probably not, but that didn't mean it wasn't a possibility.

But there's no way he would've let those wooden ninja off him. No freakin' way! Whatever he was, he was not dead, and he's in no way prepared to think otherwise.]

I'm not dead! Nobody around here is dead, got it!?

[He screams way louder than necessary, but he really could care less. He's tried hard to keep his temper in check so far, but this guy's attitude has gotten on his last nerve.]

If you wanna sit around on your butt thinkin' that, Boulder Boy, you go right ahead. But I'm findin' my brothers and blowin' this popsicle stand with or without anybody's help.

[zerotoawesome]

Okay, okay! Nobody here is dead. Cool.

[Not that he thought they actually were, but he's not putting a lot of thought into how or why they were here. He wasn't smart enough to deal with this kind of stuff.]

First of all, it's Rockslide. Don't forget that. [Pointing at the camera as if it would intimidate anybody.] And I don't want to sit around here either, but I'm pretty sure this is one of those moments that someone is supposed to tell people like me that we need to know what's actually going on here first.

[meanandgreen]

[Yeah, you're trying to intimidate the wrong guy, here. Raph just crosses his arms and scowls, stubborn as ever.]

You don't think I know that? [Okay, well, not like he gave the impression that he's actually using his head, but he does do that sometime. The rest is pretty much just venting with a heavy dose of machismo.] All I know is this Emperor chick abducted us and is plannin' on keepin' us here like her little pets.

I know she's gotta be powerful, and I know I ain't gonna be able to just stroll up there and punch her in the face like I want to. But that's not gonna keep me from trying.

I'll find my bros and we'll get a plan. We've broken out of stuff way worse than this like a hundred times before.

[zerotoawesome]

No, I don't think you do know it, especially if I'm the one having to tell it to you. [Seriously, what's up with that?]

So what are you anyway? You talk big, but you better be pretty badass if you're gonna back it up.

[meanandgreen]

I'm a ninja.

[Which is about as badass as they come, in his opinion.]

[zerotoawesome]

Uh... No. You're a turtle.

[meanandgreen]

I'm a ninja and a turtle.

[zerotoawesome]

Okay, I guess that's kind of cool, even if it still doesn't make a whole lot of sense. You look like a mutant, dude.

[meanandgreen]

Probably 'cause I am a mutant. And I could say the same thing about you.

[Specifically, you look a heck of a lot like those humans turned monsters by the Shredder's goons they ran into in the Underground a few years ago. Even got the name to go with the looks.]

[zerotoawesome]

That's because I'm a mutant too. That's how I knew that you were one too.

[You know, besides the whole green and shelled part.]

[meanandgreen]

[Yeah, the shell does tend to give it away.]

So the lady's got a thing for mutants. [Which... doesn't sound too good to him. Considering the freakshow going on with the kedan, he figured he wouldn't have to be worried, but jeez. Maybe she started up a collection.] Great.