005: [Video]

[alpha_squad_leader]

[Victor isn't a happy lizard right now. He looks tired and annoyed but he offers a wave to the camera before he starts talking.]

The rationing is bad enough but on top of that, my boss seems like he's trying to be as irritable as Wolverine usually is. All this mold that showed up is getting on my nerves too. Cleaning it up at work and the coming home to clean it up here is just too much. [He shakes his head.] Add in the cracks showing up all over the place and this annoying fog that's been showing up for the past few nights and I'm ready to get out of here.

Is there anyone out there that's got some extra room and wouldn't mind if Santo and I crashed with them for awhile? [He's worried about Santo and his big rocky self.] At least until whatever is going on stops?

Comments

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[zerotoawesome]

[Okay, Santo definitely didn't know anything about that, at least the blood part.] Blood... Slides? Okay, you're going to have to explain this to me and tell me that it wasn't like a waterpark slide. [He knows it's not, but that's chilling even to him, and this is just how he deals with this kind of stuff.]

If I eat just enough to keep me from feeling hungry [And they that, he really means just a tiny piece of bread], will you promise to take the rest?

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[alpha_squad_leader]

[Victor sighs.] Slides are what you put things on so you can look at them under a microscope. We found some with blood on them.

That was the plan all along, Santo.

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[zerotoawesome]

Oh yeah... I knew that. [He's not sure if he's relieved or disappointed that he was wrong.] Do you know anything about the blood on it? Like, is it different from normal or something?

[He sighs.] Okay, cool... But I get to decide how much is enough for me.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

No you didn't. [He shakes his head.] Not yet. There's a science guy looking at it.

And if I notice you're lying about it being enough, I'm going to make you eat more.

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[zerotoawesome]

Then I just won't let you catch me when I lie to you about it.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

It's more likely that Johnny Storm, Wonder Man, and Iron Fist would all propose to me before you'd be able to fool me like that.

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[zerotoawesome]

Dude, it's more likely that I would propose to you before even one of them did.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

[Victor just gives Santo a mildly annoyed look.]

The point is that you won't be able to fool me so don't try to starve yourself.

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[zerotoawesome]

Are you sure about that? I fool you all the time, Vic. I could even be fooling you right now.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

What're you talking about? Since when do you ever fool me?

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[zerotoawesome]

Like all the time, bro. I'm all up in your head.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

The only thing you're all up in is being nuts, bro.

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[zerotoawesome]

Yeah, your nuts!

[...]

Wait, that didn't come out right.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

Yeah, that sounds wrong on a lot of levels.

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[zerotoawesome]

And yet you still loved it. [Santo teases, pulling Victor into a loose side-hug as he starts walking again.]

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[alpha_squad_leader]

Not in the least bit. [Victor sighs but doesn't pull away.]

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[zerotoawesome]

[Santo just chuckles softly, knowing Victor all too well. He falls into silence for a few minutes though.]

Hey... We're gonna be alright, right?

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[alpha_squad_leader]

We got through rationing on Utopia, we'll get through it here.

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[zerotoawesome]

Yeah... But on Utopia we had Iceman for clean water and Namor to punch dolphins for dinner.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

Namor would punch you if you suggested he punch a dolphin. And we can fish here just fine. We've got Atlanteans around too. And some kind of ocean demi-god.

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[zerotoawesome]

Please, like Namor could even handle someone like me. And I'll bet you ten dollars he's punched a dolphin before, and over something stupid like it disrespected his authority.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

Santo, Namor would pound you into gravel. [He rolls his eyes.] Punching a dolphin in the past does not me he wouldn't punch you before he punched another one.

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[zerotoawesome]

Not if I used the dolphin as a shield. The point is that even on Utopia, we still ate better than we are now.

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[alpha_squad_leader]

No using helpless sea mammals as shields! [And a punch for Santo.] Barely.

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[zerotoawesome]

What if it was an evil sea mammal? [He sighs at the punch.] My point is that it's harder here, and they might get worse... So let be responsible and manly for once by taking care of you.