tushanshu | Verse 04 -- Video

[Compared to Jehan's last post a week or so ago, he looks much better. He's slept, he's eaten, and he's up for trying to interact with people again. He smiles a bit shyly when the feed clicks on, blushing as he usually is]

I wanted to apologize if my...behavior last month upset anyone. I was not feeling well and wasn't thinking clearly. I hope that anyone I upset or worried can forgive me. Ah...and I wanted to thank everyone who offered assistance. I am--it was greatly appreciated.

[Understatement of the centuries. This is followed by some private messages, all of which are absurdly easy to crack. The guy's from 1832. He's just happy he can make the private.]

[Original Amis sans Marius]

[The smile's gone, and Jehan is serious]

I wanted to...to remind everyone that should you feel as I did last month I am here to listen or talk or simply keep you company. I know what happens when you shut yourself away, now. I do not want that to happen to any of you.

[Dorian Gray]

[Shyly:]

Is it too late to accept your offer of that flute, Dorian?

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That sounds stupid. [ Straight to the point. ] They ain't your friends if they don't stand by you, so why'd you be afraid to tell 'em? Then you thought they weren't really your friends. Makes no sense!

Unfortunately, that's how it is. Was. Old habits die hard.

[He smiles a bit]

You've quite a bit of sense for a boy, Gavroche.

It's common sense. I think you adults just forgot a bunch when you start worryin'.

[That gets a laugh out of Jehan again]

That we do.

I mean-- [ Oh no, Jehan, that laughter is encouraging him to share his views. ] --You guys worry about whatcha look like an' what you say but if you just be who you are normally and don't fool no one, no one would have that problem to begin with!

Unfortunately, there are times where we cannot be who we wish to be. My mother, for example, would have had a fit if she knew about what I got up to in Paris. Trips home were full of carefully worded responses and hiding my books from her.

Then it's best y'just get ridda your mom mom, then. I mean I don't, an' I'm fine. [ SHRUG ]

[Mildly horrified at the very thought:]

God, I could never do that. She is one of the most important people in my life.

[And it hurts, a little, to know that he can never see her again. Not in France]

Hey. [ Gavroche is trying to clap him on the shoulder like he's seen many other men do, trying to give advice to one another. ] It's time y'moved away from the nest, huh?

[He laughs a bit]

I moved away from home nearly ten years ago. I just love my mother very much.

Then you're a lucky man an' gotta hold on to that, I guess. If y'know your mom. [ Hmmm is that a brief, breif hint of bitterness? Yes, yes it is. ]

Edited 2013-05-01 04:42 (UTC)

You do not?

I seen her face around a bit, huh? [ Casual shrug. ] I recognize her, anyway. [ That's the same thing, right? ] If that counts as knowin', then yeah.

...may I ask why you do not know her very well?

'Cause I left. [ Or, more accurately, he was kicked to the curb. Still--Gavroche's tone is light, almost airy. ] It don't matter, does it? M'still Gavroche.

No, I suppose it does not matter. I was simply curious.

[Why would a child leave his mother?

Then again, he's seen a few terrible mothers. Perhaps it was for the best that the gamin left his]

Would you like something to eat?

Always, Jehan. Y'should know me by now, huh? [ But he's grinning--genuinely happy. ]

I'm glad 'bout this. That we all get to live here, for a lil bit, before we go to heaven or hell or wherever we're meant to go.

Heaven, I believe, or whatever paradise awaits the good.

[He goes to his kitchen and pulls out some fruit, traded to him for one of his items (he can't remember now, it was a day or two ago)]

No one who fought for liberty is meant for eternal torture.

We we're gonna get into heaven? Even if we've been pretty bad, right? Grantaire'll get into heaven? Or Bahorel, even though he just fights all the time?

I personally believe that all people will reach their paradise save for those truly despicable sorts, the ones that harm children and helpless women for no reason other than their own amusement or those who use religion to murder innocents.

Hmm... [ This is pretty heavy for a gamin, but Gavroche seems to be taking it in stride. He thinks Jehan is a little odd--and, well, he finds him fun to be with because of this stuff. ] D'you think of this stuff a lot?

Oh, yes. I've spent hours contemplating the afterlife and how we reach it once we die.

[He laughs]

When I was barely your age, I spent days wondering if my cat would go to heaven and was quite upset when my priest said she could not. I refused to attend Mass for months.

Why? Was she a bad cat? [ That..makes no sense. Gavroche is just gonna squint at you until you fess up on the real answer. ] Good cats should go to heaven.

I was told it was because she did not have a soul or some other such thing, I don't recall exactly. I refused to believe it, and did not attend Mass until that Christmas, when my grandmother made me.

That doesn't make any sense. Cats live, an' they eat lots, an' they either like you or don't like you, so they're like people. So they have souls!

...

This is confusin'.

(no subject)

poeticverses - 2013-05-29 19:45 (UTC) - Expand