tushanshu | 002 Audio - The One Where Mike Tries To Barter

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002 Audio - The One Where Mike Tries To Barter

So...okay. Here's the thing. I can live frugal. I'm good at living frugal. There are fewer people out there who can dumpster dive as efficiently as I can. Trust me, my stone soup? Is amazing. I can make a Reclaimed Tuna Casserole Surprise that will knock your socks off.

As awesome as I am, even I can't make something from literally nothing, which is kind of what I've got at the moment. I say kind of because I have a whole bunch of little pots of home-made Floating Fruit preserves, jams, and jellies, and now that I'm officially out of money, I'm looking to trade them for...anything edible that isn't floating fruit. I've had my fill, thanks.

So, anyone out there interesting in jam for say...chocolate?
Or jam for bread?
Or jam for...seriously, anything.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

And you're willing to part with chocolate in exchange for...jam.

[It's not that he thinks you're crazy, it's just....he thinks you're crazy.]

I could always take back the offer if it bothers you that much. [Hey, even teenage girls have to eat more than just chocolate.]

Nono...let's not get hasty. It's just...if I had chocolate someone would have to pry it from my even colder dead hands. That's all.

[A laugh.] I'm not that serious about chocolate, and it sounds like a pretty good trade to me.

[There's an audible gasp from the other end of the line.]

Really?! How does it feel to be so totally and utterly wrong?

[Vanessa laughs again, a little louder.]

You keep convincing me that I'm wrong, you do realize that you're not going to end up with any chocolate at this rate?

Maybe that's all part of my plan.

...

Wait no, that's a stupid plan. Forget we ever said anything about it.

It's not like I'm giving you all of my chocolate.

So what you're telling me is that you have more chocolate than you're letting on.

Iiiiiinteresting.

Why do I get the feeling that's going to backfire on me?

Because you have better than average instincts?

We could go with that, sure.

Excellent.

So...for the sake of a purely hypothetical argument, what kind of chocolate are we talking about here?

Mostly just chocolate bars. They're the cheapest and easiest to get around here.

Seriously? How the heck did I miss that they actually just...sell chocolate?

There's not a lot of it now, because of the rations. Like, barely any. Even the cheapest is pretty expensive. [And she did a lot of her shopping when they made landfall.]

All right, well...I feel like less of an idiot then, because I only got here just before the rationing anyway. Or maybe it just feels like that's been going on forever.

You shouldn't feel like an idiot at all! [Yup.] It definitely feels like it's going on forever, though. [Sigh.]

I'm used to scrounging and scavenging, but...pickings are slim when everyone scrounges and scavenges.

People are working on solutions, but yeah. It's difficult, especially for people who have never been through something like this before.

Never thought there'd be a benefit to growing up dirt poor before.

Yay me!

[A snort.] There's a reason for everything that happens.

How Mister Miyagi of you.

I really don't mean to be all zen.

That's exactly what someone who is all zen would say.

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