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[myownhand]

[There’s a finger tapping at the screen a bit, then a soft laugh of victory]

Haha, knew I could get it t’work.

[A blur of red as the figure of Merida comes into view. Seems like the princess has been figuring how to work this thing for most of the morning—and been watching the various other videos and messages zipping by all day.]

I suppose I should introduce myself. I am Merida, first born descendant of clan DunBroch. [There's a hitch of pride in her shoulders, it doesn't matter where, when, or WHY she is anywhere-- she will always wear her name with pride.] I guess y'could say I'm new here, though th'-- kedan, as they were, were very helpful in explainin' most everythin'. That we’re all stuck here, no way out, etcetera, etcetera.

[Then the camera switches directions and you’ll notice it firmly pointed at a toilet.]

But what is this—and why is it in th’bathroom?

[…They don’t exactly have indoor plumbing in DunBroch. Or porcelain toilets. The kedan told her about it, that doesn't mean she recognizes it quite yet.

But wait! There's MORE.]

Also, what is this I hear about a celebration goin' on? I haven't really found my way around yet.

Comments

[Video because it had to happen.]

[skybluejeep]

[He's staring at the screen before he starts talking, and his jaw is kinda hanging loose. And then he gets a big dumb grin on his face. Oh dear.]

Uh. That would be what we call a toilet. You use it for private moments rather than a privy. Like...you know. Um. I can't believe I'm trying to explain this. Um, just out of curiosity, when are you from?

[Video. because it is happening.]

[myownhand]

That's a toilet? Isn't it a bit..... [....] clean?


[YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW WHAT TOILETS LOOKED LIKE IN THE MIDDLE AGES.]

Erm, well, my father and th'other clansmen defeated th'vikin's before I was born, if that's any good indication.


[She's from waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay long ago.]

[Video.]

[skybluejeep]

Yup. That's a toilet. And it's a wonderful clean beautiful thing, trust me.

[He can take a guess what toilets were like! Since, you know, death by dysentery was common. Ew. Also, he might be totally enamored with her accent.]

...Okay, wow, that's a good indication, yeah. So...you must be going through some pretty bad culture shock right now. Electricity, computers, bound books, processed plastics...damn.

video

[backwordscompatible]

[You poor, poor thing who obviously doesn't realize the Turtle is full of immature teenage boys who will, no doubt, take advantage of the toilet question to demonstrate their lack of maturity. Just this once, Zatanna will take pity and focus on the latter inquiry instead.]

You mean the Bacchanal? It's pretty fun. You should come check it out.

[myownhand]

[Man, and it's still an improvement over the suitor situation she had faced back home-- OH WELL...]

Bacchanal, like Bacchanalia? Isn't that somethin' th'Romans celebrated?

[She may be comparatively ancient, BUT she was educated!]

...And what are we celebratin' anyway?

[backwordscompatible]

Well, apparently, everybody's Roman this week.

[Togas optional.]

[She actually has to stop and think about it for a moment, before shrugging.]

Does it really matter? A party's a party.

video;

[definingfuture]

You're going to find a lot of things like that here. Most of them are helpful.

[myownhand]

I've already figured out th'light things. I just haven't gotten a chance t'get a good look around yet.

[Lord help us when she finds the microwave.]

Is this what it's like beyond my time? All of these things exist everywhere?

[backinakidflash]

Hello Merida. I'm Bartholomew, male line descendant of clan Allen.

[He grins at the screen.] OK. No. Well. Yes. But call me Bart. The kedan are good at that whole huge information overload that tells you everything, but leaves you totally confused and feeling like you don't know anything.

So that thing there - [He points past her in the direction of where the toilet is] - is the toilet, and it's where you do your. Uh. Personal business. Just remember that you need to push the handle down when you're done and if there's a lot of business to attend to, you're gonna want to use the handle a few times.

1/i will tell you when this is finished.

[myownhand]

Hello, Bart. Nice t'meet you.

[Oh hey, another ginger! She'll give him a smile as she's back to the toilet to investigate.]

Why would y'push th'handle down m-- [And now she pushes the handle.]

[myownhand]

[There's a startled yelp as the handle depresses and the water flushes-- she even drops the comm device.]

OH--!! What's it--

DONE. Shorter than I thought tbh

[myownhand]

[The noise subsides and the princess will be appearing back onto your screen, Bart.]

What was that? Is it supposed t'do that?

[This... has been a startling day for Merida.]

[asoothingvoice]

[Someone's certainly excitable. And wondering about a toilet of all things. Thankfully it looks like at least a few others already answered that question.]

Hello, Merida. I'm Bianca.

There is another turtle island here underwater [which is such a strange thing to say], where they're holding a party. [Which is held by ghosts.]

[myownhand]

It's nice t'meet you-- Bianca. [She sounds out the name. hilariously more similar in origins to hers than her own name is to any of her other family members. But that's a topic for another time] More islands? Startin' t'seem a bit excessive if y'ask me. Though, I guess if it helps 'em keep things organized....

[She couldn't really complain.]

video

[neoguardian]

[Have an Echidna in your screen.]

That would be a toilet...they normally put them in the bathroom, at least where I come from...but sometimes you'll find houses with bathrooms that have hidden toilets!

[She'll let Merida chew on that for a little while.]

Oh, right, there's a festival going on right now, if you hurry you'll catch it...even though I don't think it's going anywhere any time soon.

[myownhand]

[.....]

Oh well, Thank you--




[Give it a second....





Give it a second.......]


So what would you be, then?


[SHE NEEDS TO ASK.]

video;

[wintershepherd]

Wow, I didn't think they made accents like that any more-- sounds kind of like you poured glue through a blender.

1/2

[myownhand]

[HAODISIHDOSAH HEAR THAT HORRIFIC NOISE OF DISGUST? THAT WOULD BE COMING FROM MER.]

[myownhand]

And what exactly is wrong with m'accent?


[Do you feel like running away from arrows for the rest of your stay here?]

[bacondivination]

It sounds like someone's settling in well.

[ Smiling at her is a tiny Norse godling. ]

[myownhand]

[Tiny Norse godling he may be, but he looks relatively normal to her. For the moment.]

I'm not sure about settlin' quite yet. I still don't understand what sweat pants are or how th'lights work. [Granted, this is more of an exciting prospect for her.]

'Least I know what a toilet looks like now.

Video

[aloneintheuniverse]

[Clark doesn't use the Network often, but he happens to catch this one.]

Don't worry, miss Merida. You're not the only person not in a time they're used to. [Though maybe the difference isn't as striking for Clark. He at least knows what a toilet is.]

And the party is... sort of fun. If you like dancing.

[myownhand]

[She smiles at the new face, a little happy to hear that there are others just as out of place as she is.]

Well, I haven't done much dancin'. Much more used t'sword fightin' and horse back ridin'.

video

[spiderkid]

I... Really hope someone explained to you what a toilet is.

BEST RESPONSE SO FAR.

[myownhand]

Yes, and that it makes a loud sound once y'push th'lever. I've got it, thanks.