oo2 ; [ video ]
[It has almost been a month, and already Eponine looks far better than she had when she made her first appearance on the Network. Gone are her bloody rags, replaced by clothing that, while perhaps not her preferred style, actually fit her small frame and kept her covered. There's a light in her eyes that hasn't been there before.]
I had been wandering about the other night, keeping to myself- an old habit that I cannot drop, I do love to venture out at night, to see what there is, to experience a world that no one else sees because they are asleep- and I had a thought.
I have been here near a month. A month since I could feel my life leave my body. Such a long time! But already- already here I have been happier than I can recall in nine years! Only one other time can eclipse this!
Here, I have a home, clothing, a bed. There is food and I am warm. I have my beautiful brother- and mark me, I shall not leave him again, I have promised him and I will not go back on this promise. Not again- and I have friends.
I do not suppose I have ever had a true friend until I came here.
Death is by far one of the more grand things that has ever happened to me! To think-- no. I shall tell you, if you are listening, that I am happy here. Happier than I have ever deserved!
[She pauses for a moment, looking off to the side of the screen, and frowning.] Perhaps Enjolras is right. It is stupid to do these things so late at night. Forgive me. I have made a fool of myself yet again.
I had been wandering about the other night, keeping to myself- an old habit that I cannot drop, I do love to venture out at night, to see what there is, to experience a world that no one else sees because they are asleep- and I had a thought.
I have been here near a month. A month since I could feel my life leave my body. Such a long time! But already- already here I have been happier than I can recall in nine years! Only one other time can eclipse this!
Here, I have a home, clothing, a bed. There is food and I am warm. I have my beautiful brother- and mark me, I shall not leave him again, I have promised him and I will not go back on this promise. Not again- and I have friends.
I do not suppose I have ever had a true friend until I came here.
Death is by far one of the more grand things that has ever happened to me! To think-- no. I shall tell you, if you are listening, that I am happy here. Happier than I have ever deserved!
[She pauses for a moment, looking off to the side of the screen, and frowning.] Perhaps Enjolras is right. It is stupid to do these things so late at night. Forgive me. I have made a fool of myself yet again.
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As far as bawdy though? I do not have much to temper, truly. I suppose I rarely pay attention to that sort of thing.
[Can one hide in their hair? he suddenly wants to, at the discussion of that.]
It would indeed, I think. And you were among our honored dead, though we did not know your name then. You would hardly be just a body.
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Very well. Just keep it in mind. I may be a lady, but I do not act as one.
[Technically, yeah.]
I was? [She smiles faintly.] Thank you, Enjolras. I... [his words catch up with her, and her smile falters, her eyes losing some of their shine.] Did Marius not tell you my name?
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[That does get a little laugh out of Enjolras actually.]
Marius came to us a Bonapartist of all things and still an ardent admirer of Napoleon. I cannot say I share those views of his, but they are not your own, so I will spare you the rant, I think.
Of course. You are much more...perhaps the soldier...than the lady. Well, no harm in that. If I should think of anything like that, I promise I shall not hold back with you, can that suffice?
You were. [His nod is grave again.] you died for the republic too, whatever your initial reasons coming might have been. That did deserve the honor we did the others.
He may have, at the time. I am quite sure he must have somewhere along the way.
[He HOPES Marius did at least. If he did not and she had died there, well, that would be fairly awful.]
There was so much chaos arising there. It is hard to keep track of everything, you see.
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Me? A soldier? Perhaps I will take it. I know not what I am, other than myself. I appreciate it. I do not wish people to be dainty around me. I am unaccustomed to it.
[Marius is clearly the greatest person. Oh look Eponine is dead, but hey, letter, so I'm going to go read it while covered in Eponine's blood, nbd.] I understand. He would have. He is a kind man like that. He gave me such hope.
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[Enjolras's tiny eyedart there should indicate the joke he's making in the moment.]
As much as any of us were in the end, I should think. And no, I will not be dainty. You bled and died with us, which is certainly good enough to make you an equal. Class makes no difference, so why should your gender?
[Not that he's prone to off color jokes or anything, but you know, if he was? He'd totally take note of this and make sure to tell them all to her. He's made a promise just now, after all.
Go Marius. Seriously. And preferably away for the moment. Not forever, but the moment. Thinking of you too much gives one a headache.]
Did he then? I am glad of that.
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If only all men were like you. Though I fear the world would be a strange place if that were the case.
[Marius Pontmercy: greatest friend ever. Greatest person ever. Just purely great. The best. What a dork.]
He did. He paid my family's rent, once. Lived next door to us. He was a saint.
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[ his tone is a little wry there, as he thinks on that consequence.]
As to Marius? Did he really? I've been learning here there is more to him than I thought. Perhaps I have been wrong to dismiss him so easily as I do.
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[She looks at him incredulously.] He did! Do you think I lie to you, m'sieur? No, he did that out of the kindness of his heart. He did not even know us as anything other than the Jondrettes, his neighbors. [He knew she was a Thenardier now, she was sure. And given that she'd been arrested? He had to know.]
No, do not dismiss him. His head may be lost, but his heart is right where it should be.
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[And it makes Enjolras feel almost worse that he's actually gone ahead and basically encouraged Marius to do risky, possibly very harmful things, and simply thought he was an idiot who would do them. He nods as Eponine tells the story, his expression becoming thoughtful.]
So it is. Marius is...confused I think, sometimes, but that is not so bad a thing in the face of all else. And after his actions at our barricade...were you there yet, when he threatened to blow us all sky high so the guard would back off?
Those are not the actions of someone who is entirely foolish or careless, no.
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[She tries to think back to that moment, and nods.] I... I was. I saw it all. From... From down below. [Her voice is quiet, her gaze averted. He'd done that after saving Courfeyrac and Gavroche, from what she could see. Only able to do it because of her actions.
Her selfish actions because she did not wish to live without him, even for a second.]
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I think that can be applied to many men that I have known quite well, yes.
It was good to have him at the barricade with us, in the end. He was certainly our salvation at some of the most important moments. I fear that I may not have shown him that appreciation for that here. I need to speak to him again.
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He held me as I died, and listened to me. I care for him greatly, but you have surmised as such.
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Then I shall try, at any rate. I cannot think that he would mind.
[This may have worked better when Marius thought they all died, actually.]
A true sign, right there. Grantaire of all people held MY hand, so I do understand that now.
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Grantaire, Enjolras? I do not know him.
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Grantaire was one of les amis, but not exactly so. He did not quite share all of our ideala, but kept our secrets, and heard our ideas, and then, he chose to die as one of us, when the squad came to shoot me.
It would be wrong to think he did that for me, and not for the republic, but we were together, so...I do know what that is like.
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It is a noble thing he did.
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I do not even know if he realizes.
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And yes, if I learned anything at the barricades, and from waking here and Grantaire's leaving us...do not leave those things aside for a moment. You will have cause to regret that, most likely.
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Then I shall tell him when I next see him.
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But yes. Grantaire was never happy in that life or in this one. With any luck at last, he will have found some measure of it.
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The poor man. I certainly hope he does. It's a miracle I have managed to find happiness here. However fleeting I am sure it is.
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I am glad you are here, then, for Gavroche as much as allowing us to come to know you. Jehan especially had been looking out for him, but even so. Better his sister be here for him.
[And if Grantaire were to return as Eponine has, what then? Enjolras is not sure he would like that at all, though there is much that he would say.
And, as for the other him, well...]
I do feel badly for the other me, being yanked first here, and then away from it. With any luck, those other selves have found peace though. That is the best we might hope for, I think.
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I do not know how I feel about the other me. She was not me, in the sense that I am. But she was. It... I try not to think of it, and wash the idea of her from my memory. But hopefully, she finds her happiness.
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[And he is nodding, a thoughtful look crossing his face.]
And nor was he. He did some work here that I hope I can continue but perhaps not in quite the same ways, and...I do think thinking too much of it would create some problems, but with any luck, he's well enough, or perhaps found Grantaire to tell him the things I did not have the time to say. At least one of my chief regrets would have some resolution then.
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