[Console] Audio; OPEN

[edgeoftheknife]

Look, ah.

There's something I've been meaning to tell you, for... well, probably close to two hundred years, now. It's been on my mind a lot lately, and I think I need to just come clean about it.

So, here goes.

Anton?

You snore. A lot.

Comments

[edgeoftheknife]

Yyyy...ees. Your point being...?

[backwordscompatible]

That you're basically telling everyone you two are sleeping together.

Which, hey, is cool with me. I'm all for the latest Shell gossip that doesn't involve me.

[edgeoftheknife]

Funny, I'd have thought that would be common knowledge by now. Maybe news doesn't get around as fast as I'd imagined.

[backwordscompatible]

It is Turtle gossip, after all. Pretty sure it's going to be slow by nature.

Should I offer my congratulations [or condolences] belatedly, or is it too far gone for that?

[edgeoftheknife]

...you have a point. I'll have to start thinking in terms of turtle-related puns, this whole turtle thing is still awfully new to me.

Congratulations on what, sleeping with Shudder? [actual laughter] Good lord, have you met him? Besides, after this post I'm pretty sure I'm getting kicked out of bed tonight anyway. It's a long night of sleeping on the carpet for me.

[gistful]

I take offence at the fact you felt the need to laugh. Are you saying I'm unsuitable to sleep with for some reason, Ravel?

[edgeoftheknife]

...I meant only that it should be self-evident how amazing you are, Anton. Have I mentioned how amazing you are? And forgiving. And handsome.

[gistful]

Better. Continue.

[edgeoftheknife]

And not at all inclined to shove me out of the bed, because you're so understanding and wonderful. And snuggly.

[gistful]

What, in the three or so centuries we've known each other, has given you the impression that I enjoy snuggling?

[edgeoftheknife]

I didn't say you enjoy snuggling. I said you are snuggly. There's a subtle yet enjoyable difference there.

[gistful]

I don't want to be snuggly.

[Somehow, in some Anton way, he even manages to avoid making it sound petulant. It's more like he's pointing out that Erskine is overlooking the fact it isn't a compliment.]

[edgeoftheknife]

But I like snuggly. I sleep so much better when you just give in and accept the snuggles.

[backwordscompatible]

[Her response came slightly delayed, as she was a little preoccupied with both her own love life's surprise intrusion into the ongoing conversation, as well as his.]

[Where was the popcorn when she needed it? Partially to throw at Jack]

Sorry. If you're looking for pity on that one, then you've come to the wrong girl.

Boyfriends shouldn't publicly comment on their significant other's breathing habits and expert to walk away consequence-free. [AHEM]

[edgeoftheknife]

Oh we're not together together. Just... sleeping together.

Although I was totally right. See that, Anton? I'm the boyfriend.

[backwordscompatible]

You realize you just completely contradicted yourself, right?

[You can't NOT be together together AND be the boyfriend.]

[edgeoftheknife]

Did I? I hadn't noticed.

[backwordscompatible]

[Uh-huh. Sure, you didn't.]

Also, just for the record, if one of you is the boyfriend, then the other one would be too.

[edgeoftheknife]

No, I'm pretty sure that makes Anton the girlfriend. He even looks better in heels than I do--and that's saying something, let me tell you.

[backwordscompatible]

Not all girlfriends wear heels. Just saying. Makes it harder after to chase after the boyfriends when they're being stupid.

[Taking this conversation seriously? Not even remotely.]

[gistful]

With an emphasis on 'boy'.

[edgeoftheknife]

You're absolutely right.

Cradle-robber.

[gistful]

Grave-digger.

[edgeoftheknife]

I... have no come-back to that.

Well played, sir. Well played indeed.

[gistful]

We're working on your stamina when I get home, Ravel.