[Console] Audio; OPEN

[edgeoftheknife]

Look, ah.

There's something I've been meaning to tell you, for... well, probably close to two hundred years, now. It's been on my mind a lot lately, and I think I need to just come clean about it.

So, here goes.

Anton?

You snore. A lot.

Comments

audio;

[cherrywood]

I make an herbal for that, dear. No one should be kept up for such a simple thing.

[edgeoftheknife]

Fantastic. I haven't been able to get a wink of sleep in weeks. You, my dear, are a life saver.

[cherrywood]

Come by my shop, and I'll give you a jar of it. How you get him to take it, now, that's your own challenge!

[redlightgreenlight]

Well, that was anticlimatic...

[edgeoftheknife]

Funny, that's just what I said.

[redlightgreenlight]

All that build up for something so...disappointing.

audio

[backwordscompatible]

[In spite of everything that had been happening over the last couple of months, including an increased level of semi-regular grumpiness from soul gem tainting...that brought a wide smile to Zatanna's face.]

I've said it before. I'll say it again.

You do realize this whole Network thing is completely public, right?

/hijacks

[wintershepherd]

... so this isn't the type of announcement you want when I tell you the same, right?

HI JACK

[backwordscompatible]

[Boy, you are lucky she likes you so much, or you would be so dead...er.]

Not unless you want to publically announce that the only reason you'd know whether or not I snore is because you watch me when I sleep.

[edgeoftheknife]

Mm? I'd kind of thought that was the point, yeah.

...why? There wasn't anything terribly offensive in all that, was there? Is there some taboo against snoring I haven't been told about?

[backwordscompatible]

Not particularly.

More like innuendo regarding certain sleeping arrangements. Given that the person most likely to complain about any snoring would be the one sleeping right next to you.


[...or trolling boyfriends who don't actually sleep often.]

[needmetoo]

[That startles a baffled but genuine laugh out of her.]

You wanted to say that for two hundred years?

[edgeoftheknife]

Well, if we're really counting it may be closer to three hundred, give or take a decade. It's hard to remember that far back, you know?

[aquanimity]

[There's laughter in Aqua's voice as she responds.]

Is that really the sort of thing you want say in public about your employer?

[Aqua has seen the maid clothes, Ravel. Everyone who works there has.]

[edgeoftheknife]

He's only been my employer for the last week or so, technically. He's been a thorn in my beauty sleep schedule for centuries.

audio;

[denyamenti]

So what you're saying is that you're a little slow, getting yourself up to things?

[edgeoftheknife]

What I'm saying is that I'm the very model of a polite, long-suffering friend, and yet even I can take no more of this.

You, sir, are reading far too much into things. I think you might need a hobby.

audio

[gistful]

[From some console somewhere while running an errand.]

I do no such thing. I'm a superior specimen in every way.

[edgeoftheknife]

No, you're right, you don't.

[He's just being a shit. Chin in hands.]

Having fun out there, Mister Superior Specimen?

(Audio)

[stonebird]

Do you seek to embarrass him?

[edgeoftheknife]

Always, my dear lady.

[bigdamnhiro]

[He is fourteen and reacting to this exactly how you'd expect a fourteen-year-old to react:

Which is to say, a whole lot of cackling as he ducks just off-screen.]

[edgeoftheknife]

Excuse you, sleep deprivation is incredibly serious.

[Except he's laughing as he says it so take that as you will]

[wolfstrike]

Huh, you don't say. You learn something new about your boss every day.

[Cause yeah, technically Yuri works for Anton too.]

[edgeoftheknife]

[Cheerfully:]

I don't know if I'd try the blackmail angle if I were you, unfortunately. He'll just deny that he snores and everyone already knows by now anyway.