[NPC] | [console] video;

[ironrule]

[Around about lunchtime on the first of January, every console in Keeliai beeps with a city-wide announcement. While the announcement initially plays without prompting, it can be replayed and re-accessed at any time, ensuring that not a single citizen or Foreigner misses it.

It's Tu Yunxu, broadcasting from inside his study at the Snakes' mansion. He looks as immaculate as ever, dressed in a silken suit with gold thread used liberally throughout.]

It's come to my attention that several people have managed to extract considerable quantities of salt from this oppressive fog. I'm offering a bounty to anyone who chooses to turn their salt over to the Snakes. Prices are negotiable. You will, of course, not be punished for choosing not to take me up on my offer - I am by no means instituting a salt tax. The salt doesn't appear to be dangerous, although I wouldn't recommend ingesting it.

This offer is open to Foreigners as well. I'm sure some of you have been... experimenting.

Thank you.

[And the announcement ends.]

Comments

[ironrule]

I beg your pardon?

[Yes, it's most likely a joke or some other attempt at humour, but Yunxu isn't accustomed to people taking time out of their day for nothing more than making a joke to his face. It's... oddly appealing.]

[wolfstrike]

No salted fish, huh? Guess I still got a lot to learn about Kedanese food.

But if not for food, what else would you use it for? Some sort of scrub or maybe that crystal stuff I've heard about? Gotta be some sort of use for it if you're hoarding it like a rat.

[ironrule]

You're right. There does.

[Which is about all Yunxu will say on the matter, just as with everyone else who's asked.]

Do you have any salt to sell? Or do you, like so many of your compatriots, simply want me to reveal all my secrets to you?

[wolfstrike]

Secrets have a funny way of coming out eventually, and when they do its usually not pretty.

[He's pretty sure they'll find out what Yunxu is up to eventually.]

[ironrule]

That's true as well.

[Yunxu smiles. This particular smile isn't actually a dangerous one - it's pure amusement.]

The trick isn't to control whether or not a secret comes out. The trick is to control how it comes out.

[wolfstrike]

Yeah, spoken like a true evil mastermind.

[That definitely sounded like something a few other people at home would have said. And most of them were dead thanks to him.]

[ironrule]

Thank you.

[Yep. He definitely takes that as a compliment. Or at least, it sounds like he does.]

Can I help you with anything else?

[wolfstrike]

[Well okay then, seems he pegged this guy right.]

Nope, I'm good.

[ironrule]

Then if you'll excuse me, I have a terribly busy day ahead of me.

[As far as hang-ups go, it's not exactly impolite. That's probably a point in Yuri's favour. Then again, who's counting?]