2 ϟ video .

[puppetfetish]

_{[ While other people are out and about in the snow, this certain Texan is staying indoors as much as possible.
Hey turtle-crew. Here is mysterious text guy that has been bothering you over the past week or so. Looks like he's climbed out of his shell and onto video, though it isn't his preferred method (in actuality, Bro prefers to be the person behind the camera... but that's another story.) The dude is tall, and his flaxen hair is spiked high. It typically is covered by a hat, but this evening, it seems he's going without. He's also wearing a black undershirt with black slacks, sculpted muscles rippling with his movement. ]}

Hey.

<sub>[ So what could this six-foot-something-tall, beef-cake guy want? The way he was stoically looking at the camera was a bit intimidating, umber colored eyes hidden by a pair of pointed shades. Behind him in his suite there seems to be a mess of all sorts of fabrics and materials he has obtained, along with a stray sewing machine.

He looks off to the side for a moment, lacking any expression, then turns his attention back to the feed. ]</sub>

I'm selling handmade cute shit.
Come and get it.

_{[ .... Okay? Not what you'd expect from a guy with his looks and physique, also not the greatest sales pitch, but maybe you ought to inquire further. ]}

Also taking commissions.
Bitches love commissions.

_{[ /end feed right there. ]}

Comments

[video]

[unconchonable]

[This... guy. Eridan's not sure why he's somehow surprised by this, but here he is. But hey, fabrics, sewing machine, commissions? Maybe this guy is actually good for something beyond being attractive.]

What... sort a commissions are we talkin' here? Like, what can you make exactly?

[Pls say capes pls say capes pls say capes]

[puppetfetish]

_{[ Oh, hey. Grumpy alien Sburb player. This kid needed the biggest attitude adjustment still— Bro liked a challenge. Everything will be okay, Eridan. Let him take you under his wing. Become a Strider. ]}

Already thought of you, princess. Don't you worry your fuckin' fins.

_{[ Look at that cheeky ass-smile.
He'll leave you in the suspense of what it is. ]}

[unconchonable]

[Sorry Bro, he is an Ampora and that isn't going to change!!]

Prince. [He gives him an incredulous and suspicious look. HE DOESN'T TRUST THIS....] You hawe?

video;

[baniichan]

[Short and simple. Barnaby can't say such a pitch would get the guy very far in the corporate world, but it suits him well enough. Although some people probably would have questioned whether hiring someone this weird would be such a good idea, Barnaby has worked with enough eccentrics that he honestly isn't very put-off by it.]

I might be interested, but I would have to see samples of your work first.

[puppetfetish]

_{[ oh fuck it's perfect hair cute guy again. He doesn't know this guy other than their short text interaction the other day, but now they're both on camera.
Cool. ]}

Hang on, bro.
I'll fucking show you.

_{[ He pans out of the shot. ]}

video;

[baniichan]

[Barnaby peers forward, trying to get a better look at what Bro is trying to show him.]

I meant samples of your completed work. Right now all I see are materials and...novelty items. [That's the politest way he can describe some of the puppets he's looking at right now.]

Unless that's your specialty, in which case I'll contact you if I ever find myself interested in puppetry. [Not too likely.]

[langsyne]

[Scott has no interest in cute shit but Cassie might. And even though he already has plenty of plans for holiday gifts, he can never resist buying more things for her.]

What sort of cute shit?

[puppetfetish]

You know— fucking cute shit. Cute shit that doesn't have a purpose— it's just hella fucking cute.
Stuffed toys, clothing, accessories. I can make anything.

_{[ He watches the other person intently. Hm. ]}

Shopping for somebody else?

[langsyne]

[HMM. Curiosity: piqued.]

Yeah, actually. My daughter. [Scott squints at the screen.] Can you make like--pink hair clips and stuff?

video;

[oyaji]

[ Cute shit?! This seems to be some kind of code hard-wired into middle-aged super heroes because they seem to be a'flocking to this transmission. ]

Can you make like bunnies or whatever? Like, really pink ones?

Re: video;

[puppetfetish]

Shit, man. I can make fucking pink bunnies every damn day of my life.

_{[ He can't complain about a request like that! ]}

video 1/2

[oyaji]

Really?!

video 2/2

[oyaji]

Okay, wait... How much are you charging here?

If I wanted like a bunny keychain or something?

video;

[crabmunicator]

[Karkat has no trouble recognizing Bro when he sees the post. For all their initial conversation was purely through text, he's watched things through the view screens enough to recognize this guy. Even if he hadn't, the blond hair, sunglasses, and stoic expression are dead on Strider cooldude act.]

[He's glaring a bit as he replies.]

Is this the misspelled "thing" you were working on? Quote-unquote "cute shit"? Let me guess, you're doing it for the ironies.

[Look at those enclosure talons his hands are making.]

1.2

[puppetfetish]

_{[ FUCK look at those little stubby horns. What a precious dysfunctional child. Let him papa you. ]}

2.2

[puppetfetish]

Nah, bro. Thing is a WIP still. Everything has to be perfect on that motherfucker.

[crabmunicator]

[Karkat flings his arms out in a gesture of utter frustration.]

Fuck me with a culling fork!

If this isn't the thing, then what is? And what is this shit? And why cute stuff? Is there any point in asking at all, or am I just flapping my word shutters in the breeze, babbling nonsense to the wind itself as it carries these bundles of sound and fury into the endless void of existence?

video;

[imaginate]

You got any samples?

[Kyle has no interest in buying any for himself, but he knows Midii or maybe even Toph might like something, and the man's short, efficient pitch appeals to him. So big brother hat is ON and he's peering at Bro's feed.]

video;

[puppetfetish]

Damn straight I do.

_{[ Bro pans out of the shot for a moment, then calls out. ]}

Clothing, accessories— whatever you want to see first, dawg.

video;

[imaginate]

What about stuffed animals?

[spiderkid]

What sort of [not gonna swear, not gonna swear] stuff are you selling?

[He might be in the market for a Christmas present or two…]

o/ yo, sorry i kind of flaked out on our last thread!

[puppetfetish]

You mean what sort of shit?
Bro, you can have whatever the fuck you want.
Usually can make it. I'm that good.

np, happens to the best of us

[spiderkid]

Can you make a scarf? And, uh, [He has to think about what he wants to give Cassie. He kind of has a crush on her and he doesn't want to screw up his chances.] a, like... oh, I dunno. What do girls like?

[Video]

[tony_redgrave]

...

[Are you serious right now guy. This dude doesn't even look like he'd know what cute was if it bit him on the ass. But you know what? The curiosity will kill him if he doesn't ask.]

Cute shit? The hell you making 'cute shit' for?

[puppetfetish]

Bitches love cute shit.