video; fanfic narration. because he can.

[choiced]

[OOC: Warning for some smuttiness! I will avoid explicit stuff, and replies should likewise avoid explicit stuff, but there is absolutely smuttiness going on.]


[Zelos will be honest -- he didn't really know what to think of the fanfiction at the Foreigner Festival when he first realised what it was, and he hasn't gone out of his way to find any more since. There's something about the idea of someone narrating his life that doesn't sit well with him.

But then. But then.

He gets his hands on these.

When the camera turns on, Keeliai gets treated to one of Zelos's smarmiest grins. He's holding a book -- or a paper document that does its best to pass for a book, anyway -- and he waves it at the screen.]

Hello there, all my beautiful hunnies! I have a special treat for everyone today. You know those stories people write about us? [He waves the papers some more.] I hit the jackpot! You'll never guess what I found.

[Some people can maybe guess.]

Hang on, I'm going to read out the best part. If anyone knows who 'Inaev Morenth' is, by the way, I'm happy to pay you to tell me. Okay, so here we go! This one's called The Hot Dust.

[And Zelos clears his throat, repositions the papers, and... proceeds to narrate what is unmistakeably, from the very first word, smut. Perhaps mercifully, people can turn off their consoles whenever they want.]

Comments

[simulsimul]

An interesting thought, for an essential mercenary.

[It'd be like joining the castle guard. Some mercenaries did, but it rather changed the nature of the title.]

Useful by whose standards?

[People tend to have feelings about productive use of time. Or so Kratos has discovered, from Raine and Zelos and Pepper.]

[annihilist]

[How did they get on this topic? He's not liking where this is going.]

Mercenaries get paid by someone. I'm not for hire, where I come from.

[Well, he could be, but that wasn't how he operated. Fewer strings and paper trails.]

Mine.

[simulsimul]

[Essential, Devin. Essential.]

What would you call yourself?

[Freelancer, perhaps? Hmm. Kratos lifts a shoulder briefly.]

Be prepared for whoever suggested your contribution to have some feelings about that.

[He would have thought it was only something people from his world did, if not for Pepper and some things he's seen on the network. Not realised: that he is perhaps already filling that function.]

[annihilist]

A hunter. It's the most apt.

[It differentiates them, doesn't hide what they're doing. It's not as detached as being a pure mercenary, in his opinion.]

She didn't make it a requirement of me, and even if she did, it's not as though I care. It's been half a century since I followed orders.

[And that was largely because he had to, but it had been easy. Soldier fit well on him.]

[simulsimul]

['She'. Kratos pauses. He can think of at least two women who could fit that description. Kratos's head tips.]

But you care enough to make the effort, in any case.

[He is well-versed in the arte of hearing what hasn't been said. Yuan also speaks in subtext.]

[annihilist]

It's more a matter of coincidence. I'd get bored if I sat around doing nothing.

[Even those times when he was alone it the mansion, he occupied time either with reading or practicing or planning the next mission. Here, his focus has had to shift somewhat.

And Kratos is right, though Devin won't admit it out loud. He won't sit idly by when there's something he can do to protect people.]

[simulsimul]

Of course.

[It's said in the matter-of-fact way of someone responding to what's left unsaid. Dryly:]

Should I be asking what else you do to alleviate your boredom?

[annihilist]

Reading, for the most part. Learning kedanese. Memorizing the city layout, and as much in three dimensions as possible - rooftops, primarily.

[And... that's about it, outside of work. And memorizing the layout was definitely work-adjacent.]

[simulsimul]

Stargazing.

[There's the implication of a smile in his face. That had been both incredibly awkward and not, at the time. Which is perhaps actually relevant.]

I found a kedanese cartographer who's worked with constellations before. She has some beautiful maps of the sky.

[annihilist]

[Devin is immediately a little suspicious of the turn of this conversation, given that he was still using Kratos for entertainment at that time. This feels like it's leading to something and he's not sure he likes that, but he carefully keeps his expression the same as before.]

She must be tenacious, given how the turtle doesn't remain stationary for very long. I take it you've continued craning your neck at the sky, then?

[simulsimul]

I didn't say all of them are accurate. It's something of a family project, it seems; they've been trying to track the stars for generations.

[He tips his head.]

Yes, I have. Would you like a copy of the map she sold me? Or was the stargazing just an excuse, in truth?

[annihilist]

An interesting choice for a family business, but quite unique.

[Devin takes less than a second to decide whether or not to lie, and the rest of the second to decide whether or not to make the channel private.]

I do have a telescope in my home world. Nothing spectacular, but it pays to remain mostly nocturnal there, and it seemed a fitting way to fill the hours.

[Not to mention some of his favorite books as he grew up and taught himself things were written by astronomers and philosophers who looked to the stars and dared to wonder.]

[simulsimul]

[Kratos notices Devin volunteering personal details and not answering the question about the map. What's the difference there? He has to wonder.]

A logical hobby, given your circumstances. Is there a reason why you wouldn't want a copy of the stars here?

[It's possible he feels it's 'cheating', but then, why not say that from the off?]

[annihilist]

[Amateur astronomy was simply a tactic to pass time when he wasn't killing people, and a way to maintain his sleep schedule. Accepting the idea of something that might, in some lights, be considered a gift is ironically much more difficult.

It's possible he pauses a moment too long before answering.]

None that immediately come to mind, other than you haven't told me where to find this mapmaker yet.

[There, if he can buy it himself, it's just a good tip and not a problem.]

[simulsimul]

[Faintly amused.]

I already have one. The gald I had on me when I arrived is rather more than most things here are worth, so she gave me more than one for the price.

[He'd learned early on how rare metals were, on the turtle's back.]

[annihilist]

[How inconvenient.]

And I suppose you won't let me buy it off you, will you.

[It's half-observation, half-question, and Devin sounds faintly chagrined.]

[simulsimul]

[Uh huh. Another head-tip.]

Is it so difficult to accept a gift?

[annihilist]

[Yes, yes it is, Kratos. He can't remember how long it's been since someone gave him a real gift.]

People don't usually have a reason to give one. Where are you even keeping them? I was under the impression you weren't properly living anywhere.

[When in doubt, deflect.]

[simulsimul]

I wasn't aware a reason was required.

I've been keeping them in Raine's office.

[Without having actually asked, but he'd been fairly sure she wouldn't mind.]

[annihilist]

[This is more uncomfortable than Devin will admit and he's thankful he knows how not to show it.]

'Required' is perhaps a strong word. Typically there's a life event or some pretense or other.

[And typically you have to like someone to want to give them a gift.]

Or an ulterior motive, in a less genial context.

[simulsimul]

I haven't had much opportunity to give gifts. Consider it a selfish act of kindness. Or simply sharing intelligence, perhaps.

[Faintly amused. Honestly, Devin's the one making it a big deal.]

[annihilist]

[It's weird, okay? He doesn't know how to do normal about this sort of thing.]

Ah, yes, the classic marketing scheme of renaming something. Very well, if you're going to insist this much.

[simulsimul]

[Prickling makes it weirder, Devin. Perhaps uncharacteristically, Kratos chuckles.]

You remind me of someone I know. He reacted the same way when I first gave him anything.

[Unless one counts naming the Swallow, but Kratos doesn't. That's hardly tangible, and had happened far before he and Yuan actually spoke to each other.]

[annihilist]

[His life skills need to be expanded to include proper social interaction.

There is an eyeroll.]

People around this city keep telling me I remind them of someone. And here I thought I was unique.

[simulsimul]

Not so much. Does that offend you?

[Still amused.]