tushanshu | 001

[ So, Roy hasn't been around that long, but he's gotten to know Keeliai, the natives, heard about the Emperor and definitely picked up on the tension between foreigners and the Kedan, but just out right asking about What The Hell Is Wrong With This Place seems a little too obvious. And lame.

And this way is much more fun. ]

Okay so is there a part of living on the back of a giant magic turtle that isn't supposed to be completely awesome? Because a lot of you seem to be really bummed about it, and I'm starting to think it's more than just a strong case of Stick Up The Ass going around.

[ And frankly, Roy likes looking like the idiot. He raises up a hand holding some kind of Kedanian smoothie in the cafe he's seated in, and gives an 'okay, humor me' kind of gesture. ]

Let's pretend for two seconds that you're all actually the most boring people ever and the part where we're on a monster turtle isn't enough for you - you're getting what's practically a free vacation. A beautiful city on a tropical island that's really more like a cruise, and even a space you can go sit near Yurtle's massive head and zen your neurotic brains out. The closest we have to that at home is legalizing pot.

I know I'm inviting a sea of sarcastic quips to kill my buzz about the whole badass Suessical adventure, so let's try to be organized and civil about this - there's only so much scathing sardonicism I can handle at once. Please fill out the attached form and get back to me:

Your Name: Self explanatory.
Your Age: It'd probably explain some things, I'm jussayin.
Level of Suck of Your Homeworld: On a scale of Fantasia to Bambi. Just trying to keep some perspective.
Your Complaints About Our Magical Turtle Adventure: Let it all out, brothers and sisters. Testify.
Notes: Whatever. How's my hair?

Thank you for your participation! Here is a wavier for your free snow cone! Not really. Sorry.

[ Oh wait, just this last piece here: ] Also, if you know anyone who likes to run around in tights and a mask, maybe a cape, let me know? Thanks! [ A little salute, and he signs out. ]

[[ ooc; If you could, please fill out his permissions post ova hurr, and here's the html for his little questionnaire thing :>

]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ 8( whoops ]

It's a sad face with an open mouth. See it? And it's a book written by a guy who loved opium.

[Oh! That makes sense. Still, Bryn switches to video because it's easier.]

Thanks for explaining. And that sounds like quite the book. I don't suppose you happened to come with a copy, did you?

[ He'll switch too. ]

Sadly not. I'll see if I can do a dramatic retelling of it for you sometime.

[She grins, pleased by the offer.]

I'd love that. With a drink it's bound to be entertainment enough for an afternoon.

[ Hm, oops, tmw you're a recovering alcoholic and you order sodas at bars :|a There's a little bit of awkwardness in his smile, but it passes and he laughs. ]

You'd probably understand it better after a drink or two, yeah. Let me know when you're free.

[Bryn notices that small bit of awkwardness and tilts her head.]

Oh anytime is fine, really. My schedule is quite flexible. There are a few cafes in the Fire Sector I'm partial to actually if you'd like to meet at one of those.

[The bars are largely depressing these days anyway. Hff rationing.]

[ Not really going to comment on it :T 'I ruined my life with substance abuse' isn't really a first conversation kind of thing. ]

Well, I'm meeting up with some guy who's gonna tell me about my better half from an alternate dimension, but afterwords, my schedule is blank. I could use some exploring.

[Yeah, that can be kinda awkward for a first conversation.]

Well if you want a tour around some parts of the city, I could show you. There's bound to be some place or another I haven't yet seen since I've only been here a few months.

Yeah, the don't really have a visitor's center and free park maps or whatever, so a tour would be awesome. Does the city take over the whole turtle or is there, I dunno, other fishpeople towns?

It seems to be centered over the highest point of the shell. There's a wide area around the city that's just barren. It's about four to six hours out to the edge and some areas are just shell, others have dirt. We've been trying to tend to some fields of crops where possible...oh, and the palace is up toward the turtle's head.

[ Hold on, trying to visualize. And barren, that's weird, then how do they get their foo--

Oh. ]

So that's why with the rationing? I'm guess the giant turtle doesn't import, huh? Right, I've been in the palace. Like zen central in there.

[Bryn nods immediately.]

The turtle does go to the mainland for supplies, but rarely from what I understand. We were just at a place called Atam, but it's the only time I've been around for landfall in the three months I've been here.

I don't think they would have even had to do any rationing except that there seemed to be some damage to the turtle. I think it was sick or injured and when it wasn't doing well other things started failing too.

So, this isn't an abandon ship kind of thing yet? How fast has it been going on the downward scale? 'Cause if that's the case we need to find life jackets and boats so this doesn't turn into a Titanic thing.

[ Srsly, he's not doing that 'never let go shit', Rose better move the eff over. ]

It's a recent situation and as far as I know, it's being taken in hand. Certainly I think there would be preparations being made if it was so bad we needed to worry about boats.

[Pausing.]

And what exactly is a Titanic thing?

A movie that will make you both develop a mancrush on Leonardo DiCaprio and then cry your face off later.

Also, a huge ship that has a bad meet up with an iceburg and ends up being super tragic and this joke was in really bad taste.

[ oops ]

[Yeah she...hasn't heard of Leonardo DiCaprio before. The blankness in her expression says as much.]

It must have happened a while ago for you to feel comfortable joking about it, however, yes?

[ 8| welp. Sorry, his native language is pop culture references. ]

It waaaaas... 1910s? I think? So little over a century ago, from where I was? I dunno, jokes about tragedies are kind of always in bad taste.

[She shrugs.]

Sounds like enough time to make jokes, I think. Deities know we do much of the same where I'm from.

[Grinning, she cants her head to the side.]

Sometime sooner rather than later.

Dunno, man, there's some things over a century old I'd still drop kick someone for.

[ Mention Trail of Tears to him and he will cut a bitch. Or make fun of drug addiction, idk. ]

But guessing neither you or I have relatives that were on the Titantic or have particularly strong feelings about DiCaprio, so I think we're cool with this one.

That's safe to say, considering I'm not from any version of your world.

[She grins and shrugs.]

In any case, we can talk about that more later. I ought to let you get acclimated some more. Come find me when you want that tour, alright?

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